National Anthem of the Ancient Britons

"National Anthem of the Ancient Britons", also known as "Woad" or "The Woad Ode", is a humorous song, set to the tune of "Men of Harlech". It first became popular in the 1920s as a song in the British Boy Scouts and appeared in The Hackney Scout Song Book (Stacy & Son Ltd, 1921). The author was William Hope-Jones, a housemaster at Eton, who wrote it some time before 1914, as he sang it at a college dinner at that time. "Ho Jo" appears in the M. R. James' ghost story Wailing Well (1928), in which a group of masters take the Eton Scout Troop on an ill-fated camping expedition. The song recounts the ancient British tradition of fighting naked, dyed with woad. It has also been known as "The Woad Song" and "Woad of Harlech".

Lyrics

 * 1.
 * What's the good of wearing braces,
 * Vests and pants and boots with laces,
 * Spats or hats you buy in places
 * Down in Brompton Road?


 * What's the use of shirts of cotton,
 * Studs that always get forgotten?
 * These affairs are simply rotten:
 * Better far is woad.


 * Woad's the stuff to show, men.
 * Woad to scare your foemen:
 * Boil it to a brilliant hue
 * And rub it on your back and your abdomen.


 * Ancient Briton ne'er did hit on
 * Anything as good as woad to fit on
 * Neck, or knees, or where you sit on.
 * Tailors, you be blowed.


 * 2.
 * Romans came across the Channel
 * All wrapped up in tin and flannel:
 * Half a pint of woad per man'll
 * Dress us more than these.


 * Saxons, you can waste your stitches
 * Building beds for bugs in britches:
 * We have woad to clothe us, which is
 * Not a nest for fleas.


 * Romans keep your armours;
 * Saxons your pyjamas:
 * Hairy coats were meant for goats,
 * Gorillas, yaks, retriever dogs and llamas.


 * Tramp up Snowdon with our woad on:
 * Never mind if we get rained or blowed on.
 * Never want a button sewed on.
 * Go it, Ancient Bs.

Variants
Last-line variations include: "Go it, Ancient Britons", "If you stick to Woad", "Bottoms up to woad", "W - O - A - D", "Good for us today", "Go it Ancient Brits", "Woad for us today!" and "Bollocks to the breeze!"

The song appeared in a YHA Songbook from the Youth Hostels Association in the early 1970s. A version of the song appears in the 2009 novel Skin Overcoat by British author Skee Morif.

Published versions

 * The Hackney Scout Song Book (Stacy & Son Ltd, ten editions; 1921 to 1972).
 * Dick and Beth Best The New Song Fest. Intercollegiate Outing Club Association, 1961. May be in 1948 and 1955 editions also.
 * Anthony Hopkins Songs from the Front and Rear: Canadian Servicemen's Songs of the Second World War. 1979 ISBN 0-88830-171-5
 * Skee Morif Skin Overcoat. 2009 ISBN 0-9552841-2-0

Recordings

 * Joe Hickerson with a Gathering of Friends Folk Legacy 2002
 * Oak, Ash & Thorn Sowing Wild Oats & Out On a Limb