Talk:Étienne Perier (governor)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: GhostRiver (talk · contribs) 23:22, 9 October 2021 (UTC)

I'll be happy to review this! —  Ghost River  23:22, 9 October 2021 (UTC)

Infobox and lede

 * Citation needed for Perier the Elder, since it is not mentioned in the body ✅

Early life

 * The note on spellings of his surname should probably be in the lede, per MOS:MULTIPLENAMES ✅
 * Comma after "the family moved to Dunkirk" ✅
 * The link to frwiki on his father should be when the father's proper name is given, as opposed to where it currently is ✅
 * For chronological flow, this should be one paragraph, with the information in the second paragraph slotted between the sentences starting "By 1961" and "Much later" ✅
 * Combined grafs and moved the sentence about ennoblement to the Governor of French Louisiana section, which is its proper chronological place. (During the consensus seeking on the rewrite, the ennoblement sentence was there as part of trying to explain the name (Perier vs. de Perier) that ended up moving to the footnote.)

In the French navy

 * Commas after "in a fleet of coursairs" and after "until August 1704" ✅
 * "but he was later released" ✅
 * Do we know what happened after that second capture?
 * Unfortunately not. The English-language sources tend to start with his time as governor and the French-language ones cover his military service at this time mostly as bullet points.


 * First two paragraphs can likely be combined ✅

In service of the Compagnies

 * No commas needed around "Antoine-Alexis" ✅
 * Unclear why Compagnies is italicized in the head but not in the body
 * It was part of the seeking consensus on how to name the section and the oddity that some of the Wikipedia articles for these French chartered companies use the French name and others translate the name into English. (A review and improvement of all these articles would be a pretty good project for someone.) Basically, in this case it's using the French word (thus italicized) in a semi-generic-but-still-capitalized way in the head to indicate Perier was attached to more than one chartered company. In the text, however, the actual company name (in French or English, depending on what's used in the linked article) is preserved (and thus not italicized). I'll go ahead and remove the italics in the head, but see if you think they should be restored based on the explanation.

Governor of French Louisiana

 * Extra space between end of sentence "from entering the territory" and the citation ✅

Slavery policies

 * and oversaw the importation of more captured Africans to Louisiana when it controlled the colony than at any other point in the 18th century. Slightly confusing phrasing; are you saying that this point is when the Company saw the highest levels of slave transit, or that the highest overall levels of transit occurred during this time period?
 * The latter. The original source text reads "The company period also saw the arrival of more transatlantic slave ships than at any other time in the eighteenth century. In the 1720s, more than 5,600 African captives boarded company-owned slavers bound for Louisiana." Broke it into two sentences (deleting the "and") and replaced the second half with During the time it controlled the colony, more captured Africans were imported to Louisiana than at any other point in the 18th century. Clearer?


 * "He was concerned particularly" "He was concerned in particular" ✅
 * I think this is the first time "Black" is used over "African" in the second paragraph
 * Standardized as "African"

Native American relations

 * While Perier worked to maintain positive relations with France's Choctaw and Quapaw allies. Sentence fragment.
 * Combined with the following sentence. While Perier worked to maintain positive relations with France's Choctaw and Quapaw allies, in other instances he sought to dominate tribes unwilling to align with France's colonial ambitions.


 * "Perier, alongside his counterpart" (helps to clarify that the Marquis was his Canadian counterpart) ✅
 * Last sentence of the section requires a citation ✅

Personal ambition on Natchez land

 * Comma after "throwing Dumont de Montigny" ✅
 * ""acts of injustice."" ""acts of injustice"." per [{MOS:LQ]] ✅
 * "an important cultural and religious site for the Natchez tribe" ✅

Natchez revolt and retaliation

 * "freedom for them too" "freedom for them as well" ✅
 * Comma after "until January 1731" ✅
 * Comma after "shipped to Saint-Domingue" ✅

Aftermath and recall

 * More slim paragraphs; the second and the third can likely be combined as they both fall under his post-revolt activities, while the last sentence can be placed in the paragraph before it
 * I'd push back on this one. They are different enough, unrelated events that combining them doesn't seem logical to me.

Return to the navy

 * "was back at sea" "returned to sea" ✅

Personal life

 * Good

General comments

 * Photos are relevant and properly licensed
 * No stability concerns within the revision history
 * Copyvio score looks good at 11.5%

All quick stuff, just some minor prose things and a couple citations needed. Putting on hold for now, and feel free to ping me with questions. —  Ghost River  23:48, 9 October 2021 (UTC)
 * Thank you, . I think I've covered all the items listed above. If there are any additional comments or concerns, or if I missed something, please let me know. —Carter (Tcr25) (talk) 01:37, 10 October 2021 (UTC)
 * Thank you for making these edits, as well as for your explanations regarding some of the quirks I noted above. Happy to pass! —  Ghost River  14:45, 10 October 2021 (UTC)
 * Hello, I am writing a book on Etienne de Perier which will be published in a few years.

I found his birth certificate after long research: he was born on 27 February 1686 in Brest and not in 1687 in Le Havre as everyone has been saying for a long time. See for yourself: https://archives.mairie-brest.fr/4DCGI/Web_RegistreArtGG305/ILUMP30831 (page 11) Moreover, why was Etienne Perier chosen instead of Etienne de Perier? On what arguments do you base this choice? Thank you in advance for your answer. I suggest modifying the introduction as follows: Étienne Perier (1687 - 1766), or Étienne de Perier, also known as Perier the Elder (French: Perier l'Aîné). Loris565 (talk) 12:51, 11 April 2022 (UTC)