Talk:Übers Gebirg Maria geht

Recent edit
 I was looking at your recent edits to the article, and I wanted to ask you about something. Now, the first sentence reads:


 * Übers Gebirg Maria geht (Over the mountains Mary goes) is a sacred motet by the Renaissance Johannes Eccard.

The phrase "the Renaissance Johannes Eccard" is not colloquial English. Normally, a noun would follow "Renaissance" when it's used as an adjective. I think it would be best to add "composer" after "the Renaissance":


 * Übers Gebirg Maria geht (Over the mountains Mary goes) is a sacred motet by the Renaissance composer Johannes Eccard.

However, then you have "he composed" in the next sentence. Since the first sentence is really about the motet more than Eccard, it would make sense to continue referring to the motet. Would you object to changing the second sentence to passive voice, with the subject being the motet?

That is, changing:


 * He composed the work on a German text by Ludwig Helmbold in two stanzas, which contains as a chorus a paraphrase of the Magnificat.

to:


 * It is composed on a German text by Ludwig Helmbold in two stanzas, which contains as a chorus a paraphrase of the Magnificat.

This last bit is not really correct, either. The verb, "contains", is third-person-singular, so cannot refer to "stanzas". I believe it really refers to the motet (the "It" at the beginning of the sentence), but the clause ("which...") following "two stanzas" so closely makes it seem as if it refers to the two stanzas. To fix this, I would change "which contains" to "and contains", or re-word it as a prepositional phrase:


 * It is composed on a German text by Ludwig Helmbold in two stanzas, and contains as a chorus a paraphrase of the Magnificat.


 * It is composed on a German text by Ludwig Helmbold in two stanzas, with a chorus consisting of a paraphrase of the Magnificat.

Which do you prefer? Corinne (talk) 00:51, 22 December 2015 (UTC)


 * Thanks for thinking, I had meant to write "Renaissance composer" but was too tired, sorry. It don't like the passive voice, but we could say "he wrote", once we established that it was music. I like "with a chorus" --Gerda Arendt (talk) 06:34, 22 December 2015 (UTC)