Talk:ʻAkahi/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Eddie891 (talk · contribs) 23:25, 27 April 2018 (UTC)

I'll be starting this soon. Eddie891 Talk Work 23:25, 27 April 2018 (UTC)
 * The blacklist links template has got to go.
 * ✅ Eddie891 Talk Work 12:43, 5 May 2018 (UTC)
 * If no image is available, so be it. Eddie891 Talk Work 23:26, 27 April 2018 (UTC)
 * Maybe add a sentence about something she did as high chief in the lede.
 * She didn't do much of note besides held land and married politically active chiefs. The Catholic sympathy incident seems marginal to mention in introduction.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)


 * "became one of the wives" would it make more sense to say "married?" perhaps add the year of the marriage, if available.
 * Changed but there are no known dates.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)


 * "In his own right" remove, as it is unnecessary.
 * Changed.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)


 * "was known commonly by foreigners" because was is used a bit before in the sentence, perhaps rephrase as "and commonly known by foreigners as..."
 * Changed.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)


 * "attended by the chiefs and foreign residents." this reads like all the chiefs and foreign residents attended. Perhaps clarify.
 * Changed.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)


 * "Her second husband Kalanimoku," saying "her second husband" is unnecessary, because it is described above.
 * Changed.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)


 * Source 7 needs a URL to determine verifiability.
 * Added back in.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)


 * I think I will be promoting upon conclusion of my problems. Eddie891 Talk Work 12:43, 5 May 2018 (UTC)

Will address this on the weekend.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 07:05, 9 May 2018 (UTC)

Addressed all points.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)
 * See No reason not to promote. Eddie891 Talk Work 23:52, 16 May 2018 (UTC)