Talk:1922 Vanderbilt Commodores football team

Comments/suggestion
I've followed the work on this article, and it is quite impressive. I'll note below comments/suggestions that occur to me.
 * In the lead, you say: "With an undefeated year, the Commodores were often recognized as the greatest Southern team, putting them in the conversation for the best teams in the nation along with: Princeton, Cornell, California, Michigan, and Iowa." While this may be correct, the only source that you give is a fan blog written by James Vautravers.  Even if Vautravers' blog is a reliable source, there is nothing in that blog that says that the Commodores "were" (past tense) "often recognized" (i.e., recognized by multiple sources) as "the greatest Southern team."  I believe that your contention is likely correct and so have not modified it.  But such an assertion really does need better sourcing than a 21st century fan blog. Cbl62 (talk) 17:40, 9 December 2012 (UTC)
 * I was confused by the following two sentences from the lead, which appear initially to be contradictory: (1) "Vanderbilt sat atop the conference for the second year in a row", and (2) "This was also Vanderbilt's first season in the new Southern Conference." How could they have been the top team in the conference "for the second year in a row" if it was their "first season" in the new conference?  Cbl62 (talk) 17:40, 9 December 2012 (UTC)
 * You have a tendency to use the feminine article "her" in referring to the team, i.e., "her line", "her speed", and "her" new stadium. Such phrasing was common in the early to mid 20th century, but strikes me as antiquated and unsuitable to an encyclopedia article about a men's college football team. I previously changed some such references to the neutral articles ("its" when referencing Vanderbilt or the team or "their" when referencing the Commodores) and suggest that change be made throughout. Cbl62 (talk) 17:58, 9 December 2012 (UTC)
 * We face a challenge in preparing articles on teams of which we are fans. Not sure if you're a Vandy fan, but I assume so.  I've previously tried to eliminate some of the more peacockish language (i.e., "stole the show") from an earlier draft.  Some remains.  I understand and agree with the desire to use active language to bring past events to life. However, we have to temper that a bit, knowing that we are creating an encyclopedia that should neutrally reflect historical events.  Not the easiest balance to maintain.  Reading through WP:PEACOCK, WP:WEASEL, and WP:EDITORIAL might help.  Cbl62 (talk) 17:58, 9 December 2012 (UTC)

I'll read through those. As for that source, the contention is more that they were often considered the greatest Southern team (certainly were, can check the footnotes for those claims in the post-season field. I believe Camp or someone picked Tech, with Vandy second, and the rest I've seen talk about it say Vandy), and that therefore they get thrown into the conversation of best teams of that year during any time. I will still try to find a better source though. Also, I do try to edit along the way but am a lot worse at it as I write and not after, and even then I readily admit my writing could use improvements. Thanks for any suggestions; and no I am not really a Vandy fan, but an ancestor of mine was on the team, which allowed me to get through what would've been square-one of gathering sources for writing such an article. I have tried to be unbiased (of course), but nonetheless tell the season through Vandy's lens so to speak as best I could; pardon if I ran astray anywhere.

I'll also see what I can do to make that part about conference titles less confusing, some elements of the conference alignment at the time still have me confused. Perhaps I can brush up the footnote I have explaining it, it was originally in that introductory part but later moved to the post-season part. It's citation 111 at the moment, and it is an attempt to make the part you were curious about understood. If you are also just interested yourself in quelling the confusion, in 1921 Vanderbilt was Co-Champions of the SIAA finishing with the same record as Georgia, undefeated with one tie; and the one tie was Georgia v. Vandy. In 1922, the Southern Conference was established, and Vanderbilt was one of its champions that year as outlined in the article. Cake (talk) 21:55, 10 December 2012 (UTC)

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