Talk:1995–96 South Pacific cyclone season/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 17:09, 30 July 2011 (UTC)


 * First thing, you should mention how, per the JTWC, that because of the La Nina, tropical cyclone activity was shifted westward, which accounted for the diminished activity in the basin. That is the biggest thing missing, the "why" the season activity was so minimal. Broader meteorological conditions (such as in the callaghan ref) would be great for the season summary
 * Added.Jason Rees (talk) 01:56, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
 * Could you just point out to me what ref and on what page that says this season was the least active? BTW, the article is internally inconsistent, as you say it was the least active in the lede, but just "one of the most inactive seasons" in the season summary
 * Actually I didn't say it was the "least active TC Season" - i said "one of the least active seasons" so the article is at least consistent :P.Jason Rees (talk) 00:15, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * Ah, true. But, where in the ref does it say it is "one of the most inactive seasons"? --♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 00:25, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * Whoops forgot to source it - should be cited now.Jason Rees (talk) 19:14, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "The season ran from November 1, 1995 until April 30, 1996 though the first tropical cyclone of the season did not develop until January 12 before the last dissipated on April 2." - you're trying to fit too much in there. First, just say the season (and you should get a source for the season dates, even if it's just a modern source that indicates the duration of the SPAC season). Second, you shouldn't just [d]o a clean split in the sentence, as the latter portion is somewhat grammatically awkward.
 * Should be sorted - i used the TCOP from 99.
 * The subsequent sentence could be written better, though. --♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 00:25, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 00:42, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * "4.6 and 5.6 million united states dollars" - is there a stylistic reason you didn't do "$4.6–5.6 million (USD)"?
 * Nope. Ive switched to USD.Jason Rees (talk) 00:15, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * You're inconsistent with the lat/lon markings. You say "25S" but "160º", and you also say just "180º" when saying "International Date Line" would probably be better
 * Fixed the first part but with regards to the second part — Remember that the IDL does not always = 180° in the SHEM.Jason Rees (talk) 00:15, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * "On February 22 and 23, a shallow tropical depression that was moving around the Fijian archipelago, caused some flooding of low lying areas in Vanua Levu." - that's technically not a complete sentence. Try rewording
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 19:03, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * In the Beti portion of the season summary, you use the phrase "before it [verb]" in two consecutive sentences. Could you re-arrange for better flow?
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 19:03, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * 1"However RSMC Nadi did not name it as Yasi for another 12 hours, as the system reached its peak 10-minute sustained windspeeds of 85 km/h (50 mph)." - when you say "as", do you mean "until", "while", "because"? This also happens with
 * 2"During January 18, the NPMOC issued their final warning as Yasi had become an extratropical cyclone"
 * 3"RSMC Nadi then issued their final advisory at 0600 UTC, as Zaka had weakened into a tropical depression and was moving into TCWC Wellingtons area of responsibility"

That's it for now. --♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 17:09, 30 July 2011 (UTC)
 * I have removed number 1 - the other 2 refer are a because though i feel that as works better here.Jason Rees (talk) 15:19, 3 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "After it was named, Yasi accelerated towards the southeast, before moving out of RSMC Nadi's area of responsibility during the next day" - there is no date in the previous sentence, so you should clarify the exact date
 * Clarified.Jason Rees (talk) 19:11, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "During that day an upper level trough moved over New Zealand which brought the jet stream over New Caledonia, which in turn made the depression hard to locate with satellite imagery." - try rewording. You use "which" twice
 * Reworded.Jason Rees (talk) 19:11, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "However later that day despite the system being poorly organized, RSMC Nadi reported that based on observations from Matthew island, the depression had intensified into a tropical cyclone and named it as Zaka" - that's a pretty disorganized sentence
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 20:19, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "before on March 11" - :/
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 20:19, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * How close was Atu to Zaka? You mention them developing contemporaneously
 * Good Question but it is one i am not sure i am able to answer without more data from either center.Jason Rees (talk) 01:09, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "moved southeast towards 160°E and the South Pacific basin.[11] The system then crossed 160°E and moved into the basin" - that's sort of redundant. Try re-organizing
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 23:20, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "before during the next day" - eww
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 23:20, 1 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "During March 11, the depression developed further as it moved towards the southeast before at 1800 UTC, RSMC Nadi reported that the depression had intensified into a tropical cyclone and named it as Atu" - try re-organizing. I'm not sure what you're doing, but you have a lot of awkward phrasing ("before at"?).
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 12:17, 3 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "The JTWC then reported at 0000 UTC on March 12 that Atu had reached its peak 1-minute windspeeds of 100 km/h (65 mph), before 9 hours later RSMC Nadi reported that Atu had reached its peak 10-minute sustained windspeeds of 85 km/h (50 mph)" - see above ("before 9 hours later")
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 12:17, 3 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "After it had peaked, Atu started weakening under the influence of strong vertical windshear, before later that day the JTWC issued their final advisory on Atu as it had become extratropical" - the previous sentence mentions March 12, but this sentence says "later that day", implying ET that day. However, the Infobox says March 13. Furthermore, it's a rather wordy sentence. Try making it simpler, regardless which agency says what
 * From memory the JTWC said ET @ 18z while N/W followed 6 hrs later.Jason Rees (talk) 00:15, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * It's still wordy though. --♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 00:26, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 15:04, 3 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "before on..." - please fix its multiple usages
 * I think ive caught this one.Jason Rees (talk) 01:57, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "During the next day, Beti continued to develop further before early on March 24, the system passed directly over the Pentecost and Malekula islands of Vanuatu and moved into the Coral Sea" - once more, there is no date before "During the next day", and the "before early on March 24" is ehh wording.
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 22:49, 4 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "As Beti intensified into a severe tropical cyclone, the ridge of high pressure, weakened after interacting with an upper level trough of low pressure, which enabled the system to start moving to the south-southeast" - I think I know what you're trying to say, but it's poorly worded
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 01:35, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "before at 1800 UTC on March 26"
 * Reworked.Jason Rees (talk) 22:49, 4 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "During the next day, Beti moved towards the southeast under the influence of the trough, and emerged into the Coral Sea as a weakening tropical cyclone and had started to transition into an extratropical cyclone" - that's a bit of a run-on (using "and" twice)
 * Ive reworked it but im not sure im happy with my solution.Jason Rees (talk) 22:49, 4 August 2011 (UTC)
 * "and between 4.3 -5.3 million (USD)" - something isn't right there. You have improper spacing, and it should probably start with $
 * Ive added the space but i think i will leave the $ sign off as it is redundant otherwise.Jason Rees (talk) 19:34, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * "The most significant damage occurred in New Caledonia where wind and flooding destroyed crops and gardens and caused widespread disruption to the electricity network, water supply, road and telephone communications" - a comma could actually be useful there, although it's your call how you want to re-organize it (since it's a run-on)
 * You mention the (USD 4.3 -5.3 million) twice in the section, once in regards to overall damage and once in regard to New Caledonia. I'm guessing that total is limited to NC
 * Sorted i forgot to add the 0.3 that came from Vanuatu to the first one.Jason Rees (talk) 19:12, 30 July 2011 (UTC)
 * No, I don't think that's right. It says Vanuatu was $30,000, not $300,000, so the total is still $4.3 million. --♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 00:25, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * Whoops - should be sorted.Jason Rees (talk) 00:42, 31 July 2011 (UTC)
 * You should link VUV
 * Linked.Jason Rees (talk) 19:12, 30 July 2011 (UTC)
 * Is there anything above you didn't do? ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 17:02, 2 August 2011 (UTC)
 * There are a few bits i still need to sort out i think (from Atu downwards).Jason Rees (talk) 17:11, 2 August 2011 (UTC)