Talk:1999–2000 South-West Indian Ocean cyclone season/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contribs) 00:44, 21 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "The most notable storm of the season was Eline, which was the longest-lasting storm on the record in the basin." - in the record or on record; on the record is worded strangely.
 * Hah, that is strange. Fixed. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "It lasted for 29 days while traversing the entirety of the southern Indian Ocean, making landfall in Madagascar in late February with the highest winds in decades." - the entire southern Indian Ocean? Every single crevasse? Also, I understand this sentence after having reviewed Leon-Eline, but the way this is worded could be interpreted to mean that Leon-Eline had the strongest winds in decades when making landfall in Madagascar as opposed to being the strongest Madagascar cyclone in several decades (if that makes sense).
 * Removed "entire", and changed to "strongest landfall in decades". Good call. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "The storm was the first in a series of three storms that struck the country in early 2000, along with Gloria in March and Hudah in April." - Wikilink the storms.
 * Gloria doesn't have an article, and Hudah was linked previously. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "Collectively, the three storms killed 316 people" - Given the ambiguity of Leon-Eline's death toll, I'd add "at least" before the toll.
 * Good call. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "The season started on November 1, 1999, and ended on April 30, 2000" - Across the basin? Might be a good idea to clarify since the two succeeding islands have specific end dates.
 * Clarified. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "Cyclone Astride originated toward the end of December to the northeast of Madagascar. It moved generally westward, bringing rainfall and gusty winds to northern Madagascar while in the region" - Change the second instance of "Madagascar" to "the island country" to remove repetition?
 * I merged the sentences instead. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "Eline, the longest lasting storm of the season, struck Mozambique while the country was experiencing its worst flooding in 50 years, collectively causing around 700 deaths and about $500 million in damage." - Hudah, Leon-Eline, and Gloria collectively caused at least 316 fatalities, but Leon-Eline itself caused ~700? Does not compute.
 * No, Eline and the floods killed 700. Those three storms killed at least 316, that's confirmed, but there were a lot of other deaths that might've been related. Lots of flooding that year. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "It only caused three deaths in Mozambique, although its effects were worse in Madagascar, where there were 111 deaths." - only 3 deaths?
 * Eeek, removed. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * " In addition to the named storms, there were four non-developing tropical disturbances or storms, as well as one subtropical cyclone that formed in the southern Mozambique Channel." - What does "non-developing" mean? Do you mean non-designated or..?
 * Changed to unnamed. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "The agency estimated intensity estimated intensity through the Dvorak technique, which utilized the continuous satellite imagery in the basin since May 1998." - it seems there's a repeated phrase a repeated phrase.
 * :F ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "There were no indications of tropical cyclogenesis before the middle of December, putting the season among latest 20% since 1967 in terms of seasons' first storms." - add "the" after "among".
 * Got it. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "In general, the MFR used During the season, 14 tropical disturbances formed." - What?
 * Crap, removed. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "In general, there were not more disturbances than usual, although the ones that did develop tended to last longer than average." - is this tidbit in the MFR seasonal report? Also, "there were not more disturbances than usual" reads strangely.
 * Merged w previous sentence. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "There were 61 days in which a storm was active, greater than the median of 48, and more than double than the previous season." - no comma after 48.
 * Removed. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "In general, storms formed south of 10º S, with the exception of the first storm Astride, and most storms had a general east to west track due to a strong ridge east of Madagascar." - can we find a better word than "had"?
 * "tracked" better? ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:09, 22 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "Around the time of peak intensity, Babiola began turning more to the south, due to an approaching trough." - no comma after "south".
 * Axed. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "Increased shear weakened the eye and convection,[3] and Babiola weakened below cyclone status on January 11." - Eyes don't weaken, storms weaken. Eye's become obscured or open up, in which case they aren't eyes anymore.
 * What about "weakened the eyewall"? ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "On January 14, the remnants of Babiola passed just west of Île Amsterdam, where gusts reached 90 kilometres per hour (56 mph)." - Random instance of spelling out km/h.
 * Abbr didn't work :( ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "While passing northwest of Mauritius, Connie brought heavy rains peaking at 647 mm (25.5 in) over six days, equivalent to a month's worth of precipitation." - to Mauritius? This is a little unclear. Suggestion: "While passing northwest of Mauritius, the outer fringes of the cyclone brought heavy rains peaking at 647 mm (25.5 in) over the span of six days, or equivalent to a month's worth of precipitation."
 * Works well for me. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "The storm also produced gusts of 134 km/h (83 mph),[3] and one person died after falling off his roof." - Nothing wrong with this sentence, just have to wonder why a guy was on his roof in the middle of a cyclone...
 * IIRC he was repairing something during the storm. Tut tut. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "The storm also brought heavy rainfall rainfall to Réunion, totaling 1,752 mm (69.0 in), 1,296 mm (51.0 in) of which occurred in over 24 hours." - maybe put "of which" just after the second comma so that it's easier on the eyes. That's a lot of numbers in one spot.
 * Ah, good catch. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "Increased wind shear tore away the convection on February 2, causing marked weakening" - "tore away?" Sounds like something TWC or Fox News would say (i.e. it's a little too hyperbolic IMO) :)
 * Eh, I have a flare for the dramatic. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "Late on February 17, Eline made landfall near Mahanoro, with 10 minute winds of 165 km/h (105 mph), making it the strongest storm to hit the country in several decades." - don't need a comma after "Mahanoro" I don't think.
 * Agreed. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "On February 22, Eline made landfall about 80 km (50 mi) south of Beira, Mozambique near peak intensity, and quickly weakened over land." - don't need a comma after "intensity" I don't think.
 * Potato, potato. (doesn't work in prose) ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "Collectively the two storms killed 205 people,[17] destroyed about half of the rice harvest,[18] and left 10,000 homeless." - Now we're back down to less than 700 for Eline-Leon's deaths?
 * Just in Madagascar. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "In the region around Vatomandry, where Eline made landfall, 65% of houses were damaged, 90% of crops were lost, and 75% of health facilities were wrecked." - get rekt m8. Seriously though, "wrecked" -> "damaged" or, if it were severe, "damaged beyond repair".
 * What's wrong with "wrecked"? :P It's just another synonym so I don't say "damage" for the zillionth time. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "When Gloria struck Madagascar, it produced winds of 72 km/h (45 mph) at Antalaha, about 70 km (45 mi) south of Sambava." - sustained or gusts?
 * Sustained. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "The storm brought heavy rainfall,[3] with Mananjary reporting a two day total of 427 millimetres (16.8 in)." - hyphen between "two" and "day", abbreviate millimetres.
 * Done. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "However, the anticipated effects much worse than the minimal rainfall that accompanied Gloria's final landfall." - Huh?
 * Eek. I was going for this: the fear ahead of the storm was pretty bad, and there were major fears that it would cause utter chaos. In the end, those fears were so much worse than what happened. But I removed it so it makes more sense :P ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * " It re-attained tropical cyclone status on April 5, and reached 10 minute winds of 160 km/h (100 mph) by the time it made landfall on Mozambique near Pebane, Mozambique, on April 8." - first and last commas aren't needed.
 * Gotcha. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "Due to the small radius of maximum winds, the coastline was spared from strong gusts,[3] although the system dropped 93.8 mm (3.69 in) in Inhambane over 48 hours." - 93.8mm of gusts? :)
 * Fixed. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "In Morombe, rainfall over 36 hours accumulated to the average yearly total." - which was what?
 * Didn't say... ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "This caused flooding and damage to crops, and preceded devastating flooding that affected the nation over the subsequent months." - no comma.
 * Got it. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * "The convection weakened on March 3 due to the wind shear and the circulation steered more to the west-northwest." - comma after "shear".
 * "The system remained nearly stationary, and failed to organize more." - no comma.
 * K. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)


 * References 5 and 56 are dead. External links titled "Annual Summary of Global Tropical Cyclone Seasons 2000," "RA I Tropical Cyclone Committee Final Report," and "Joint Typhoon Warning Center 2000 ATCR" are dead.
 * Fixed the one, removed the others. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 03:37, 23 January 2015 (UTC)

You know the drill by now. :) TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk) 00:44, 21 January 2015 (UTC)
 * Passing. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk) 03:52, 23 January 2015 (UTC)