Talk:2011 Tarlay earthquake/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Mujinga (talk · contribs) 17:32, 7 August 2023 (UTC)

Hi I'll take this for review as part of the August 2023 GAN Backlog Drive Mujinga (talk) 17:32, 7 August 2023 (UTC)


 * I'll pause the review here to discuss the issues raised by the spotchecks Mujinga (talk) 19:07, 7 August 2023 (UTC)
 * Hi thanks for taking up this review. I'll take a few days for this because I'm down with flu. Hope to recover soon so I can get back to my keyboard. Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 12:08, 8 August 2023 (UTC)
 * @Dora the Axe-plorer Oh no hope you feel better soon! Take your time, as long as we keep in contact I'd be fine with the review period taking longer than seven days. Mujinga (talk) 12:10, 8 August 2023 (UTC)
 * Thanks. I'll try to complete this over the weekend. I'm a lot better now :) Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 03:33, 9 August 2023 (UTC)
 * nice work, hope you are back to full health - i'll carry on with the review now Mujinga (talk) 11:38, 13 August 2023 (UTC)

Copyvio check

 * Not much flagged up by Earwig

Spotchecks and referencing

 * On this version
 * Spotcheck 3: :The earthquake occurred in an area of complex tectonics caused by the continuing collision between the northward moving Indo-Australian Plate and the Eurasian Plate, which created the Arakan Yoma mountains. In this zone of highly oblique collision, most of the motion is accommodated by the north-south trending Sagaing fault, a major right-lateral strike-slip fault that runs through the western and central part of Myanmar. The remaining shortening component across this zone causes distributed deformation of eastern Myanmar and Thailand extending into Laos. This deformation is partly accommodated by a set of southwest-northeast trending sinistral (left lateral) strike-slip faults. - this seems to be giving more information than the data summary in the report? eg I don't see mention of Arakan Yoma mountains? "that runs through the western and central part of Myanmar" - also not seeing that
 * Will address this issue, gimme while Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 11:51, 8 August 2023 (UTC)
 * Okay added new sources, rewritten the paragraph to match the sources Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 02:01, 12 August 2023 (UTC)


 * Spotcheck 5: It was one of the largest earthquakes in the Golden Triangle region. Large earthquakes also struck the area in 1976 (Mw  6.7 and 6.6), 1988 (Mw  7.0) and 1995 (Mw  6.8). - 1988 and 1995 backed by source, 1976 not
 * 1976 removed Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 11:51, 8 August 2023 (UTC)


 * Spotcheck 24: On 28 March, The Irrawaddy reported many injured survivors at the Tachilek Hospital had "disappeared". The hospital was overwhelmed by an estimated 700 patients a day before the alleged disappearances. Remaining patients and hospital workers said the survivors were "sent away" by local authorities after journalists reported and distributed media on damage and casualties. Locals also reported up to 200 may have died in Shan State
 * "On 28 March, The Irrawaddy reported many injured survivors at the Tachilek Hospital had "disappeared"." - ok
 * "The hospital was overwhelmed by an estimated 700 patients a day before the alleged disappearances" - ok, "the day" would help make the meaning less ambiguous
 * "Remaining patients and hospital workers said the survivors were "sent away" by local authorities after journalists reported and distributed media on damage and casualties." - ok
 * "Locals also reported up to 200 may have died in Shan State" - ok
 * Spotcheck 26: Two days later, government officials visited Tachilek and Tarlay, meeting affected residents. Affected families were also handled cash assistance, clothings and food. Patients at the Tachilek Station Hospital were also given cash. Government officials also surveyed repair works at the Kengtung–Tachilek Union Highway, Tachilek–Tahlay Road and Tahlay Bridge. By the afternoon of 27 March, buses and small vehicles could drive along the roads and bridge - ok
 * Sptocheck 27 - ok

Images
Pix are appropriately licensed and relevant to the article. Would be great if you could add alt descriptions per MOS:ACCIM. Also I don't believe you need to have both "thumb" and "200px". Thumb is the advised sizing since it is browser adjustable.

Prose

 * As a starting question, looking at some of your previous earthquake GAs (eg 2010 Damghan earthquake), they tend to begin in the style of The 2011 Tarlay earthquake ... - have you moved away from that? Because I find "A Mw  6.8 earthquake occurred on 24 March 2011 in Shan State, Myanmar" a bit abrupt in comparison.
 * There's few editors going around removing the bold titles on their basis of WP:BOLDAVOID and those titles generally not representing the name of these events; no other explanation given. Reintroducing bold title and another editor would just remove it—that'll just irritate me so might as well not mention it. Tarlay2011 was the name given by the ISC-GEM but various literature about the earthquake also calls it the Burma/Myanmar/Nan Ma earthquake; I don't believe it's representative to settle on one name but it's also messy to have many bold titles.Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 12:06, 8 August 2023 (UTC)
 * i see you decided to go bold and the lead looks much better generally now Mujinga (talk) 11:39, 13 August 2023 (UTC)


 * Also suggest linking Seismic_magnitude_scales as in infobox
 * Done.Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 12:06, 8 August 2023 (UTC)


 * The lead needs fleshing out to summarise the article better and indeed right now it contains info not present in the body below eg Mw  6.8 earthquake and eg 151 deaths, reported in the body as "The death toll in Myanmar stood at 74 to 150"
 * The body specifies 74–151 deaths in Myanmar and one in Thailand hence the lede and infobox mentions 75 to 151. Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 12:06, 8 August 2023 (UTC)
 * yes my (badly made) point was the body is saying "The death toll in Myanmar stood at 74 to 150" and the lead is saying "There were between 75 and 151 fatalities", as is the infobox. so there's a numerical inconsistency Mujinga (talk) 11:41, 13 August 2023 (UTC)


 * link earthquake on first mention in body, in fatc I'd repeat "A Mw  6.8 earthquake occurred on 24 March 2011 in Shan State, Myanmar. It had an epicenter northwest of the border between Myanmar, Thailand and Laos" to begin the text in the body
 * I've reworded slightly but will continue to improve that.Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 12:06, 8 August 2023 (UTC)


 * link Modified Mercalli intensity scale
 * Done.Dora the Axe-plorer (explore) 12:06, 8 August 2023 (UTC)

Prose2

 * "humanitarian organizations also supported in the relief and recovery" - "relief and recovery efforts" seems more normal to me?

Spotchecks2
On this version:
 * 2 - Myanmar lies at the junction of the Alpide belt and Sunda Arc. In northern Myanmar, continental collision is ongoing between the between the northward moving Indo-Australian Plate and the Eurasian Plate. Collision also occurs along the Indo-Burman Ranges (Patkai, Naga and Chin Hills) and Arakan Mountains of western Myanmar - keyword searches for Alpide, Sunda Arc, Indo-Australian and Arakan Mountains all turn up no results?
 * Alpine–Himalayan Orogenic Belt was shortened to follow the Wiki article title. Rakhine Yoma is another name for Arakan Mountains, again to follow the Wiki title. The source refers to the Sunda arc as Indonesian Island Arc System which is one I've never stumbled upon before. I'll rename them according to the sourcesDora the Axe-plorer (explore) 12:45, 13 August 2023 (UTC)


 * 7 - The mainshock produced a 30 km (19 mi) long surface rupture along the westernmost segment of the Nam Ma Fault. The surface offset peaked at almost 2 m (6 ft 7 in). Based on inferring InSAR data, the coseismic slip along the fault rupture was concentrated within the shallow 10 km (6.2 mi) of the crust. The maximum slip was estimated at 4 m (13 ft) at depths of 3–5 km (1.9–3.1 mi) - this seems to be close paraphrasing from the article abstract which says "We find the total length of surface rupture is approximately 30 km, with nearly 2 m maximum surface offset along the westernmost section of the Nam Ma fault (the Tarlay segment) ... Interferometric Synthetic Aperture Radar (InSAR) and pixel-tracking data suggest that fault slip is concentrated within the upper 10 km of the crust. ... Maximum slip exceeds 4 m at a depth between 3 and 5 km". Also InSar shoudl be spelled out. Also in the text, the maximum slip is summed up as "the major slip patch concentrates between depths of 2.5 and 6 km, with a maximum slip of nearly 4.5 m at the central part of this depth range" so it would have been better to give those figures.
 * 20 - Most residents in Tachileik spent the night outdoors after being advised by government officials about aftershocks through loudspeakers. Many people in the town did not return to their homes and businesses were closed. Authorities were hampered by road closures in their effort to locate some injured people in the affected areas. The United Nations Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs received reports of intermittent disruption of services including power, water and telecommunications. A damaged bridge at Tarlay made access to the town challenging for aid and rescue. - closeparaphrasing again...
 * We say Most residents in Tachileik spent the night outdoors after being advised by government officials about aftershocks through loudspeakers
 * Source says: "Most of the people in Tachileik spent the night sleeping outdoors following warnings of aftershocks. Government officials, using loudspeakers, warned the people to brace for aftershocks.
 * We say Many people in the town did not return to their homes and businesses were closed.
 * Source says ""It looks like a public holiday with all shops closed," said U Maung, a Tachileik resident. "People dare not go back to their homes." - this bit is acceptable
 * We say Authorities were hampered by road closures in their effort to locate some injured people in the affected areas.
 * Source says "the military, police, and local authorities are trying to find some people injured in those affected areas, but the roads are still closed."
 * We say The United Nations Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs received reports of intermittent disruption of services including power, water and telecommunications.
 * Source says "The United Nations Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs (UNOCHA) said the "risk of landslides remains high" in affected areas and added that it had received reports of "sporadic disruption of basic facilities, including electricity, water supply, telecommunications."
 * We say A damaged bridge at Tarlay made access to the town challenging for aid and rescue.
 * Source says "A U.N. official said damage to a bridge in Tarlay made it difficult to access the town"
 * I put the source through earwig, the score is only 12% but it also gives "when a wall collapsed. Sixteen people, including seven Burmese and five Chinese nationals were also injured" versus "wall in her house collapsed. Sixteen people, including seven Burmese and five Chinese nationals, were hurt in the quake, "


 * OK so I'm stopping here to fail the article, this level of closeparaphrasing is really not good. It's disappointing to find more issues after previously querying the sourcing. I hope you haven't done this in your other GAs and would recommend to give Close paraphrasing a read Mujinga (talk) 12:26, 13 August 2023 (UTC)