Talk:2016 Paris ePrix/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Kpgjhpjm (talk · contribs) 16:23, 4 August 2018 (UTC)

Let us start this GA review. Kpgj hpjm  16:23, 4 August 2018 (UTC)

Lead

 * Please change in the Les Invalides building complex before a crowd of 20,000 . to in the Les Invalides building complex . A total of 20,000 people attended the race. Kpgj  hpjm  16:31, 4 August 2018 (UTC)
 * Please change but lost his advantage to DiGrassi on the run to the first corner . to but was passed by DiGrassi on the run to the first corner.  Kpgj  hpjm  16:36, 4 August 2018 (UTC)
 * Please change but retained his hold on third position . to but managed to retain the third position in the Championship. Kpgj  hpjm  16:46, 4 August 2018 (UTC)
 * It's late night in my time zone, I will review the rest of the article tomorrow . Kpgj  hpjm  17:09, 4 August 2018 (UTC)

1st paragraph

 * Please change Coming into the race from Long Beach 3 weeks earlier. to After winning the previous round at Long Beach 3 weeks earlier, Kpgj  hpjm  03:07, 5 August 2018 (UTC)
 * Please change and Jerome D Ambrosio for Dragon had seven points less in the battle for the position. to, seven ahead of Jerome D Ambrosio of Dragon in the battle for third position. Kpgj  hpjm  05:35, 5 August 2018 (UTC)

Second Paragraph

 * No issues

Third Paragraph

 * No issues

Fourth Paragraph

 * No real issues, but I will be making a few tweaks.

First Paragraph

 * In the first sentence remove the second occurrence of the word Sunday.
 * The team names in the parenthesis is not needed . Kpgj  hpjm  15:40, 5 August 2018 (UTC)

Second Paragraph

 * No issues

Third Paragraph

 * No issues

Fourth Paragraph

 * Mostry OK, I have made a tweak though . Kpgj  hpjm  15:40, 5 August 2018 (UTC)

Fifth Paragraph

 * : Can you say what is meant by lost time in the first second . I think it might be lost time in the first sector.  Kpgj  hpjm  15:48, 5 August 2018 (UTC)

Race
This is the section with problems in many Motorsports articles.

First Paragraph

 * When the race started . Remove the word when and capitalise T in the.

Second Paragraph

 * Remove the word Nevertheless
 * A tweaks will be made by me here.

Third Paragraph

 * In the previous paragraph, it is stated that Buemi and Turvey were battling for fifth place , so when Buemi passed Turvey, he moved into fifth . So when he passed Sarrazin , that move should be for fourth.
 * Please fix this - if di Grassi was leading, Vergne second , Bird third , and as per above sentence Buemi fourth , then where did Prost come from.

Fourth Paragraph

 * Change '''due to the tight track to due to the tightness of the track.
 * Change used FanBoost to used his FanBoost - he can' use the FanBoost of others.

Fifth Paragraph

 * No issues

Post-Race

 * No issues

Classification

 * Question : Why are names of some drivers in bold ?

Comments

 * On-hold for now, On these issues are fixed , I will take a final look and then promote the article. The issues in the Race section's third paragraph are very important ,So please take some time to fix them . When you are done , please ping me .  Kpgj  hpjm  12:54, 6 August 2018 (UTC)
 * Looks like all issues are fixed . Taking a final look . Kpgj  hpjm  13:34, 6 August 2018 (UTC)
 * It's see no more issues, passing . Kpgj  hpjm  13:42, 6 August 2018 (UTC)