Talk:2019 West Coast Eagles season/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Harper J. Cole (talk · contribs) 11:34, 25 July 2021 (UTC)

I'll take on this review, as part of the July 2021 Backlog Drive.--Harper J. Cole (talk) 11:34, 25 July 2021 (UTC)

Lead

 * [Liam Ryan won Mark of the Year with his mark he took] --> "Liam Ryan won Mark of the Year with a mark he took"

Background

 * [After the five year agreement with East Perth ended] Add the date when it ended.


 * [This was the second highest number of memberships out of each AFL team in 2019.] --> "This was the second highest number of memberships out of the eighteen AFL teams in 2019."

2018 off-season changes

 * [whilst Nic Naitanui recovers from injury] --> "while Nic Naitanui recovered from injury"


 * [2018 was the first year where there was the trading of draft picks during the draft. During the draft, West Coast made three trades.] Rephrase so that "during the draft" doesn't come up twice in a row.

Rounds 1–12

 * [Gaff had been out due to an eight match ban received due to...] The repetition of "due to" is a little awkward. Maybe replace the second one with "for"?


 * [It was the greatest defeat of an AFL reigning premier since Richmond were beaten by Carlton by 62 points in 1981.] Specify Round 1 defeat, and Wikilink 1981 to 1981 VFL season.


 * [The grand final rematch was in round three] They played each other twice, so "The first grand final rematch..."


 * [an 18 point win] Hyphenate: "18-point".


 * [Liam Ryan took a spectacular mark] Put "spectacular" in inverted commas to show that it's a quote from the AFL website (and not an NPOV violation).


 * Wikilink stress fracture.


 * [increased their percentage considerably] Can you add a note explaining what percentage is in this context?


 * My instinct is that early rounds should be written as numbers rather than spelled out ("round 3" rather than "round three"), so that you aren't switching styles for round 11 onwards. I haven't been able to find official Wikipedia policy for this though - I'll leave it to your judgement.


 * [Willie Rioli and Nathan Vardy both received a one match suspension for rough conduct] Comma after "conduct"

Rounds 13–23

 * [a much anticipated return] Hyphenate: "much-anticipated".


 * [With scores level] Unless this phrasing is common in Australia, I'd expect "With the scores level".


 * [and the second largest margin] --> "and achieving the second largest margin"


 * [West Coast had a solid win, beating Carlton 75–99.] You've generally put the winning score first.


 * [It started raining at half time] You mentioned the margin at three-quarter time in the previous sentence - thus, we are now looking back on half time, so it should be "It had started raining at half time".

Awards

 * [the Rising Start award] Typo: "Rising Star"

Summary

 * This is a thorough article with only minor issues. Bear in mind I'm not Australian, so it's possible that I may have made errors through a lack of knowledge of the field.--Harper J. Cole (talk) 14:51, 25 July 2021 (UTC)

Reply
I have done you suggestions, aside from suggestion 13, 14 and 16. I disagree that there should be a comma after conduct. With scores level is common phrasing in Australia (see, and ). I also wikilinked spectacular mark instead of putting quotes. Steelkamp (talk) 16:31, 25 July 2021 (UTC)
 * Looking good! I shall promote to GA status. Thanks for an interesting read,--Harper J. Cole (talk) 19:25, 25 July 2021 (UTC)