Talk:Amar pelos dois/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Kyle Peake (talk · contribs) 18:08, 14 May 2020 (UTC)

Reviewing this soon --Kyle Peake (talk) 18:08, 14 May 2020 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

 * Are you sure the language should be in the infobox?
 * That looks good otherwise
 * "is a song performed by Portuguese" → "is a song by Portuguese"
 * "The track was written and produced" → "The song was written and produced"
 * "and released as a digital download on" → "and released for digital download as a single on"
 * "It premiered on 19 February 2017" → "The song premiered on 19 February of that year"
 * "with a lyrical theme of" → "with the lyrical theme of"
 * Remove wikilink on breakup
 * "The track received praise from music critics – some reviewers considered" → "The song received positive reviews from music critics, with some reviewers considering"
 * Wikilink Eurovision to Eurovision Song Contest on the best entry mention
 * Wikilink Portuguese to Portuguese language
 * Remove wikilinks on commercial success and Europe
 * "number one or top ten in several territories" → "number one or the top ten in several countries"
 * Remove wikilinks on competition and 2010s
 * "Salvador Sobral performed alone" → "Salvador Sobral performed the song alone"
 * ✅ Except: The language should be in the Infobox anytime a song is not in English per the Infobox instructions. Also, I took the "all-time top Portuguese love song" to mean musically, not linguistically, but I've made the change anyway.

Background and release

 * "that's what I did."" → "that's what I did"."
 * Wikilink Luísa Sobral to himself in the quotebox
 * "was one of sixteen songs" → "was one of 16 songs"
 * "for their entry. Luísa Sobral composed" → "for their entry, with Luísa Sobral having composed"
 * "her brother, Salvador Sobral" → "her brother, Salvador" per MOS:SAMESURNAME
 * "created by his sister Luísa, she gave" → "created by Luísa, she gave"
 * "it was performed in" → "it was performed for"
 * Remove wikilinks on Festival da Canção 2017 and Eurovision Song Contest 2017 in the second para of this section
 * "became available through digital retailers and streaming services" → "was released for digital download and streaming services as a single"
 * "was released on physical format via" → "was released as a CD single through"

Composition

 * "by Luísa Sobral, Salvador Sobral's sister." → "by Luísa Sobral."
 * ""Amar pelos dois" is a" → "The song is a"
 * Give jazz waltz the same target as in the lead
 * "five seconds (3:05)" → "five seconds (3:05),"
 * "The song is composed in" → "It is composed in"
 * "and is written in" → "and written in"
 * "with Sobral's vocals spanning" → "with Salvador Sobral's vocals spanning"
 * "it has an" → "the song has an"
 * Remove wikilink on instrumentation
 * "Salvador Sobral stated that" → "Sobral stated that"
 * Remove wikilink on breakup

Critical Reception

 * Retitle to Critical reception
 * "received praise from" → "was met with positive reviews from" to be less repetitive with the lead by changing to "was met with"
 * Newspapers and other forms of publication don't need to have full introductions in this section since only quotes of critics' viewpoints are mentioned; just mention the names of the publications, not what type they classify as
 * 20 Minutes should not have minutes capitalised as that's how it's titled
 * "called "Amar pelos dois" a" → "called the track a" to avoid stating the title two sentences in a row
 * "that its jazz-pop tempo" → "that the song's jazz-pop tempo" and switch the word claimed to something else per WP:CLAIM
 * Write "The staff of" before Paris Match
 * "it as one of their ten favourite entries of the year" → "the song as one of their ten favourite entries of 2017"
 * "named it "Portugal's" → "named the song "Portugal's"
 * Wikilink to Eurovision Song Contest on this quote's mention of the contest
 * Wikilink ballad to Sentimental ballad
 * "of" has been used too many times by this time; try to variate more with "from" in the section to be less repetitive as it reads rather tedious
 * Remove wikilink on contest as that is the wrong place for that target; follow above instructions instead
 * "described it as an" → "described the track as an"

Commercial performance

 * Remove wikilinks on commercial success and Europe
 * "reached number 1" → "reached number one"
 * Sure you shouldn't name the Portuguese chart for singles and include the appropriate wikilink?
 * "following its victory" → "after its victory"
 * Remove wikilink on Eurovision Song Contest 2017
 * "debuted at number 4" → "debuted at number four"
 * "winning the national final" → "winning the national final of"
 * Remove wikilink on Festival da Canção
 * "In the following week, it" → "The following week, it"
 * "number 3,[19] and topped the chart eventually" → "number three,[19] and ultimately topped the chart"
 * "It was certified gold by" → "The song was certified gold by"
 * "selling over" → "for selling over"
 * "reaching number 1 in" → "topping the charts in both" to specify they are different charts and avoid repetitive wording
 * Again, maybe you should name the charts but I'm less sure since download ones are more minor; wikilink to them at least though?
 * "number 3 in Luxembourg, Norway and Sweden" → "number three in Luxembourg, Norway, and Sweden"
 * "number 4 in" → "number four in"
 * "number 5 in" → "number five in"
 * "number 6 in" → "number six in"
 * Probably name some of these actual "single charts"
 * "the song peaked at number 1" → "the song was a chart topper"
 * "number 6 in Switzerland, number 8" → "number six in Switzerland, number eight"
 * "it reached number 4" → "it reached number four"
 * "debuted at number 1" → "debuted at number one"
 * "peaked at number 7" → "peaked at number seven"
 * Identify the chart as being from Billboard
 * ✅ It's already pretty difficult to list the peaks without it sounding too wordy. I feel like adding in the chart names might make it harder to read, as many of them have similar, descriptive names. Up to you.
 * Just wikilink to the appropriate pages. --Kyle Peake (talk) 10:26, 25 May 2020 (UTC)

Festival da Canção 2017

 * "participating songwriter in" → "participating songwriter of"
 * Remove wikilinks to the Festival and Eurovision, respectively
 * "her brother, Salvador Sobral, was" → "Salvador Sobral was" as we already know they're related from earlier in the article
 * "by Luísa Sobral, written for the competition, Salvador Sobral selected" → "by Luísa, written for the competition, Salvador selected" per MOS:SAMESURNAME
 * "the song he would like" → "the song that he would like"
 * "Sobral competed in" → "Salvador Sobral competed in"
 * "on 19 February, placing" → "on 19 February 2017, placing"
 * "held on 5 March, he" → "held on 5 March of that year, he"

In Kiev

 * Img alt text needs improving
 * Remove Eurovision Song Contest 2017 wikilink
 * "Ukraine and consisted of" → "Ukraine, and consisted of"
 * "and the final on" → "followed by the final on"
 * "first semi-final.[36] The running" → "first semi-final, with the running" and put ref 36 at the end of the "merged" sentence
 * "was decided by the" → "being decided by the"
 * "was set to perform in position 9" → "was set to perform at position nine"
 * "and before the entry" → "and preceding the entry"
 * "Portugal was subsequently placed" → "The country was subsequently placed"
 * "before the entry from" → "preceding the entry from"
 * "Salvador Sobral was one of" → "Sobral was one of"
 * "win the contest according" → "win the contest, according"
 * Remove wikilink on bookmakers
 * "predicted Sobral's victory" → "predicted his victory"
 * "siblings Salvador and Luísa sang" → "Salvador and Luísa Sobral sang"
 * "just like they did in" → "as they previously did in"
 * Add a ref at the end of this para's last sentence
 * Merge para 3 with 2 as it's only one sentence
 * "Salvador Sobral's victory was hailed" → "Sobral's victory was hailed"
 * "Luís Filipe Castro Mendes[44] and" → "Luís Filipe Castro Mendes,[44] and"
 * "Marcelo Rebelo de Sousa who distinguished" → "Marcelo Rebelo de Sousa, who distinguished"
 * ✅. It makes more sense to leave the existing alt text per here as the caption describes what is happening.

Record-breaking victory

 * Remove Eurovision Song Contest wikilink
 * ""1944" which had scored" → ""1944", which had scored"
 * ""Amar pelos dois" is the only" → "The former is the only"
 * Remove wikilink on 2010s
 * Remove wikilink on triple metre
 * "which received 353 points" → "in receiving 353 points"
 * "becoming the only entry" → "and have become the only entry"
 * "points and surpassing" → "points and would surpass"
 * "under the 1975-2015 voting system" → "under the voting system"
 * ""Amar pelos dois" would have received" → "The song would have received"
 * "record of twenty combined" → "record of 20 combined"
 * "12 points (televote + jury vote), overcoming the eighteen" → "12 points, from televotes and jury votes, overcoming the 18"
 * Remove Sweden related wikilinks towards the end of the sentence, as they have been done in the Awards section that comes before this in the need order

Points awarded to Portugal

 * "the first semi-final and grand final" → "the first semi-final and the grand final" to differentiate that they are not both first
 * "In the end, Portugal won" → "In the end, the country won"
 * "a total of thirty sets" → "a total of 30 sets"

Live performances

 * Should be inbetween Commercial performance and Eurovision Song Contest
 * "Salvador Sobral and his sister Luísa Sobral, composer of" → "Salvador and Luísa Sobral, the latter of which composed"
 * "RFM (8 March 2017) and Rádio Comercial (14 March 2017)" → "RFM and Rádio Comercial on 8 and 14 March 2017, respectively"
 * "On 2 May 2017, Salvador Sobral's" → "On 2 May of that year, Salvador Sobral's"
 * "On 12 May 2018, Salvador Sobral performed alongside Brazilian singer Caetano Veloso at the Eurovision Song Contest 2018." → "Sobral performed alongside Brazilian singer Caetano Veloso at the Eurovision Song Contest 2018, on 12 May of that year."

Legacy

 * Merge this with the below section since that counts as legacy and place that info about the sub-section; still keep the latter here, though.

European Union Songbook

 * Remove wikilink on love song
 * ""Amar pelos dois" was the most" → "The song was the most" as you mentioned the title one sentence ago

Use in media

 * Look at what I said above; still make these changes as well, though.
 * ""Amar pelos dois" generated" → "The track generated"
 * "theme, "Amar pelos dois" is" → "theme, it is"

Cover versions

 * Imgs need alt text
 * Remove the two Eurovision wikilinks on the first bullet point
 * Remove wikilink to Eurovision Song Contest 2017 on the second
 * Do this for 2018 on the fourth
 * Remove wikilink to talk show on bullet point five
 * Mention actor's nationality on seven
 * Remove second wikilink in this section to France's 2018 Eurovision Contest involvement
 * Do the same for any wikilinks to country involvements for years that have been wikilinked earlier in this section or elsewhere prior in the article; I am not going to point out each individual one as you can find them yourself.
 * ✅ except changing the alt text. Having descriptive alt text (woman in hat, etc) is not relevant to the inclusion of the photo. The caption states everything relevant, which is that they are photos of people who have covered the song. This is in line with alt text criteria. Grk1011 (talk) 21:39, 30 May 2020 (UTC)

Track listings

 * Good

Credits and personnel

 * Are you sure capitalisation is required for the roles enlisted?
 * Rather than having ref 101 invoked twice, invoke it before ref 102 and change the sentence to including being adapted from ESC Portugal website

Awards

 * Place this directly after Critical reception section
 * "two Marcel Bezençon Awards. Salvador Sobral received the Artistic Award, whereas Luísa Sobral" → "two Marcel Bezençon Awards; Salvador received the Artistic Award, whereas Luísa" per MOS:SAMESURNAME
 * Add ref at the end of the first para's last sentence
 * Second para looks good
 * Make this table sortable
 * Add a separate col for refs that is not sortable and puts them in the centre

Charts

 * Good

Certifications

 * Are you sure a different certification table bottom shouldn't be used? Otherwise, looks good.

Release history

 * Use bullet pointed list to separate digital download and streaming here
 * Good elsewise

Final comments and verdict
all good apart from ref 87's missing accessdate. --Kyle Peake (talk) 07:48, 31 May 2020 (UTC)
 * These are my initial comments, will have more soon! --Kyle Peake (talk) 17:00, 23 May 2020 (UTC)
 * but will have comments about the refs after you have sorted out everything; the other issues are a lot bigger, that's why I'm putting this to the current state! --Kyle Peake (talk) 20:07, 23 May 2020 (UTC)
 * I believe the references are the only items I have left. I need to work on the access dates a bit more. They won't move around now if you want to start to look through them? I'm trying to finish this up for you so you can make the 31 May deadline. Regarding the copyright score, it's just the eurovision.tv website because of the quote by the song's writer as well as "Eurovision" a few dozen times. The compare button shows no correlation. Grk1011 (talk) 01:44, 28 May 2020 (UTC)
 * Have suggested more changes now. --Kyle Peake (talk) 07:38, 29 May 2020 (UTC)
 * I have made the above changes to the references and a few more that were related to your comments that may have been missed. The social media sources are ok per WP:SELFSOURCE. Is there a guideline that says otherwise? I'll reformat them with dates, titles, etc when I hear back. Thanks. Grk1011 (talk) 19:45, 29 May 2020 (UTC)
 * Take a look at External links/Perennial websites, I think you might be able to use the verified sources? --Kyle Peake (talk) 07:20, 30 May 2020 (UTC)
 * I removed the ones that were not verified and replaced one with a better source. Should be all set now. Grk1011 (talk) 21:37, 30 May 2020 (UTC)
 * Should be all set now. Grk1011 (talk) 13:20, 31 May 2020 (UTC)
 * Have looked again, and a few other refs are missing accessdates; check that all have them apart from ones like liner notes that don't cite that parameter at all. --Kyle Peake (talk) 14:26, 31 May 2020 (UTC)
 * Ok, I found the last of them! Grk1011 (talk) 00:09, 1 June 2020 (UTC)
 * ✅, since the Instagram ref can't seem to have one added when I tried. --Kyle Peake (talk) 07:04, 1 June 2020 (UTC)