Talk:American Airlines Flight 1 (1962)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: ---Dough4872 15:52, 16 December 2009 (UTC) Comments: I am placing the article on hold. ---Dough4872 15:52, 16 December 2009 (UTC)
 * 1) The lead of the article appears a little short. Is there any more information that can be added?
 * 2) Remove colon after "including".
 * 3) "no-one" should not be hyphenated.
 * 4) The sentence "300-400 policemen and fire fighters, including 125 detectives attending a narcotics seminar at the Police Academy, as well as Coast Guard helicopters were mobilized to the crash site within half an hour of the crash for rescue operations, only to find that there were no survivors." should not begin with a numeral.
 * 5) International Hotel needs to be disambuguated or unlinked.
 * 6) Throughout the article, there are many short paragraphs. Can these be combined to form longer paragraphs?
 * 7) Are there any pictures related to the accident that can be added to the article?

Changes

1. The lead of the article appears a little short. Is there any more information that can be added?


 * Added statistics (deadliest crash at the time on US soil; sixth crash of 707; deadliest crash of 707 at the time)

2. Remove colon after "including".


 * Removed.

3. "no-one" should not be hyphenated.
 * Fixed.

4. The sentence "300-400 policemen and fire fighters, including 125 detectives attending a narcotics seminar at the Police Academy, as well as Coast Guard helicopters were mobilized to the crash site within half an hour of the crash for rescue operations, only to find that there were no survivors." should not begin with a numeral.
 * Changed to "Upwards of 300 policemen and fire fighters..."

5. International Hotel needs to be disambuguated or unlinked.
 * Unlinked.

6. Throughout the article, there are many short paragraphs. Can these be combined to form longer paragraphs?


 * Removed the "In popular culture" section, that was almost a trivia section with a 1-sentence paragraph. Combined two sets of short paragraphs in section "Investigation"; remaining 2-sentence paragraph really can't be combined with any of the existing paragraphs.

7. Are there any pictures related to the accident that can be added to the article?


 * Commons and Flickr have no images of any American Airlines Boeing 707. The Accident report does not have any useful images or diagrams. So -- no.

Mûĸĸâĸûĸâĸû  (blah?)  19:54, 16 December 2009 (UTC)
 * I will pass the article. ---Dough4872 01:24, 17 December 2009 (UTC)