Talk:Ansel Adams/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: RockMagnetist (talk · contribs) 23:03, 26 February 2019 (UTC)

I plan to review this article. RockMagnetist(talk) 23:03, 26 February 2019 (UTC)


 * GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):  d (copyvio and plagiarism):  (Note: the copyright detector flagged this article, but it postdates the relevant additions to Wikipedia by several years.)
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:

Text

 * The info on his flu was inaccurate. I added some material and a source - can you check the page number?
 * It looks like that source already has page numbers included: Adams & Alinder 1985, p. 54–55. Let me know if I'm mistaken. Qono (talk) 04:10, 28 February 2019 (UTC)
 * Yes. The problem is, I don't have access to the edition that you're using, so the page numbers might be different. RockMagnetist(talk) 06:20, 28 February 2019 (UTC)
 * Sorry, I don't have the print edition of this book, so can't check the page numbers. Qono (talk) 02:14, 5 March 2019 (UTC)
 * Yosemite Valley quote: this is a nice quote, but its reason for inclusion is not clear. There isn't any text referring to it outside the quote.
 * I agree. I've removed the quote. Qono (talk) 02:15, 5 March 2019 (UTC)

Citations needed

 * Paragraph on marriage to Virginia Best
 * Done. RockMagnetist(talk) 06:36, 5 March 2019 (UTC)
 * "He decided that the purpose of his art, whether photography or music, was to reveal that beauty to others and to inspire them to the same philosophy."
 * I think it's going to be difficult to source this, and the sentiment is expressed in the preceding, sourced quotation, so I have removed this. Qono (talk) 04:14, 28 February 2019 (UTC)
 * "An early piano student was mountaineer and fellow Sierra Club leader Jules Eichorn."
 * Looked around and was not able to find a reputable source for this. Sentence removed. Qono (talk) 04:22, 28 February 2019 (UTC)
 * "His marriage also marked the end of his serious attempt at a musical career, as well as her ambitions to be a classical singer." Judging by what I have read, the marriage has little or nothing to do with ending his musical career.
 * Removed this. Qono (talk) 23:40, 3 March 2019 (UTC)
 * "During the 1930s ..." (paragraph on advocacy for King's Canyon). The NY Times article isn't an adequate source as it says very little. The proper source is the autobiography, but I don't have access to a copy with page numbers.
 * Added one with chapter numbers. RockMagnetist(talk) 02:47, 5 March 2019 (UTC)
 * I felt the second on the Mural Project needed a little fleshing out, but I am still unable to determine page numbers for the 1996 edition of the biography. Can you check the page numbers for the first and second last paragraphs?
 * I don't have access to the print material to check page numbers. Can you use the "at" parameter in the citation, quoting the text where the citation is sourced? This can be easily overridden with a page number later. Qono (talk) 02:27, 5 March 2019 (UTC)
 * I suppose I could just name the chapter. RockMagnetist(talk) 02:36, 5 March 2019 (UTC)
 * Done. RockMagnetist(talk) 02:47, 5 March 2019 (UTC)
 * First paragraph of section on 1950s cites a single page in Alinder (1996), but it's clearly multiple pages.
 * Done. RockMagnetist(talk) 02:47, 5 March 2019 (UTC)
 * Paragraph on Arles Festival of Photography
 * Sentence changed and citation added. Qono (talk) 00:11, 6 March 2019 (UTC)
 * First two sentences of last paragraph in Later Career.
 * Done! Qono (talk) 00:35, 6 March 2019 (UTC)
 * "Adams's images of the West ..." (Landscapes of the American West).
 * This is out of place anyways, so I've simply removed this unsourced content. Qono (talk) 00:39, 6 March 2019 (UTC)

Citation style

 * This is not a very important issue, but the citations/sources sections would be more compact if sfn tags were only used for sources where books are being repeatedly cited with different page numbers. One-off citations could be cited using the usual format. I have taken the liberty of using that approach for the citations I have added.
 * I think these are the two best options. 1) We use Sfn for all citations. This keeps things consistent and provides a single master list of sources. 2) We use inline page numbers instead of Sfn, which would consolidate sources used repeatedly with different page numbers, and would, in effect, combine the references and sources list. This would tidy up and consolidate the citations, perhaps at the expense of cluttering the article itself with inline page numbers. Thoughts? Qono (talk) 17:50, 2 March 2019 (UTC)
 * I'll tell you two reasons why I like the scheme I suggested: first, it's really convenient to use the pull-down menu for one-off citations, which results in the footnotes. And restricting Sfn to a few books has the advantage that it highlights the major general sources. I think my second choice would be your option 2. But you're the one who has been putting most of the work in this article, and I'm fine with whatever you choose. RockMagnetist(talk) 02:15, 3 March 2019 (UTC)
 * This makes sense to me. I've converted the citations without multiple page number being sourced to the ref style. Qono (talk) 23:34, 3 March 2019 (UTC)
 * A consistent format is needed for dates.
 * This is done. I used "Month D, YYYY" given that this ia an American photographer and the article itself and most of the sources were already using that format. Qono (talk) 23:34, 3 March 2019 (UTC)
 * I am glad to see that you are expanding the references for the works by Adams. But I'm puzzled that you moved them into Select Bibliography. Wouldn't it make more sense to keep them under Works?
 * The "Works" section is now "Photographs". I think, ultimately, much of what is in this section will be moved. The bit about color photography could be covered in "Contributions and influence" and the list of notable works can be moved to the infobox. The gallery would then be its own section. So I think it makes sense to move the works under bibliography. Qono (talk) 02:45, 5 March 2019 (UTC)
 * Fair enough. I like your new organization for "Bibliographies". RockMagnetist(talk) 02:49, 5 March 2019 (UTC)

Personal life

 * While the breadth of coverage is more than adequate for GA class, it dawned on me that there is little information on his personal life in the section on his career. When I was adding to the infobox, I couldn't determine where he lived most of his life from this article! I have added a note about the home they built after their marriage, and will add something about the later home near Carmel. But it leaves me wondering whether there are other important personal details that are missing.
 * I'm not going to worry about this one. Something to think about before submitting for FA, maybe. RockMagnetist(talk) 15:35, 5 March 2019 (UTC)

Almost done
I'm almost ready to sign off on this one. I just need to see the citations for those last three items in Citations needed. RockMagnetist(talk) 22:13, 5 March 2019 (UTC)
 * This should be done now. Let me know if you spot anything else. Qono (talk) 00:41, 6 March 2019 (UTC)
 * That will do it! RockMagnetist(talk) 01:21, 6 March 2019 (UTC)