Talk:Antarctica: Empire of the Penguin

Advert tag
Just wondering if anyone would be willing to please highlight the "downright breathless" parts of this article, following, so that I can work on addressing them? Thanks Themeparkgc   Talk  04:50, 31 May 2013 (UTC)
 * A few:
 * "rumors began circling" —this isn't really encyclopedic, reading more like a fan magazine
 * "three degrees of freedom including pitching, yawing and rolling" —"including"? no, that's all three of them; shouldn't suggest there are more
 * calling rides and their engineering "concepts" is rather over-stating the case
 * "This rise would be higher than if a single attraction was unveiled" —speculation, presented as fact
 * The second paragraph of the "Themed area" section reads like a tourist brochure or press release from the operator, encouraging purchases


 * Hope this helps! --Piledhigheranddeeper (talk) 13:00, 31 May 2013 (UTC)


 * Thanks for those, I believe I have addressed all of them. Anything else that should be addressed prior to the removal of the tag? Themeparkgc   Talk  00:03, 2 June 2013 (UTC)

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