Talk:Banished (video game)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 18:02, 29 December 2016 (UTC)

I'll have this done within the hour. JAG UAR   18:02, 29 December 2016 (UTC)

Initial comments

 * "Banished received mixed reviews on release" - italics needed
 * ✅ -ferret
 * "with reviewers praising graphics and early difficulty" - praising its graphics, and isn't it meant to be "easy" instead of early difficulty? Unless it's referring to the difficulty in the early parts of the game
 * ✅ Tweaked. Intent to indicate early gameplay. -ferret
 * "The player must assign citizens to various jobs such as a builder or fisherman" - such as building and fishing
 * ✅ -ferret
 * " Additional citizens come from two sources, the birth of children" - I think linking children could be overlinking
 * ✅ -ferret
 * The third paragraph of the gameplay section would need to be paraphrased so it doesn't rely on a single quote. How about The citizens of the society act as the player's primary resource. Keeping them healthy, happy and well-fed are pivotal to making the town prosper. Hazards in the game come in the form of harsh weather conditions, fires, depression, starvation, an ageing population. (I would have replaced it with this outright, but I posted it here first just in case you wanted to change/correct anything)
 * ✅ -ferret
 * "Development of Banished began in August 2011 and has been developed solely by Luke Hodorowicz" - was (correct tense)
 * ✅ -ferret
 * "Hodorwicz said that the Anno series" - needs italicisation
 * ✅ -ferret
 * "PC Gamer interviewed Hodorowicz in December 2013" - italics needed
 * ✅ -ferret
 * I've merged the two choppy sentences of the development section into a larger paragraph, if that's OK
 * Thumbs up -ferret
 * "Support for mods was announced in July 2014" - have they been released yet?
 * ✅ -ferret
 * "noting that Banished felt more like a" - italics
 * ✅ -ferret
 * "Polygon scored the game 7.5 out of 10.0, noting that Banished felt more like a "survival simulation" than a city-building simulation. While praising the games graphics and animations, they noted that the game struggled with giving players solid feedback on the results of their actions" - Charlie Hall is the reviewer from Polygon, so I would add his name in the prose to avoid personifying a website: Charlie Hall from Polygon scored the game... and Hall also praised the game's graphics and animations, noting that it struggled with...
 * ✅ -ferret
 * Same thing with Eurogamer, Dean Paul is the reviewer and the prose should read like Dean Paul from Eurogamer and Paul noted that having to build structures
 * ✅ -ferret
 * "PC Gamer gave the game a score of "70/100"" - needs italicising, and why is the score in quotes?
 * ✅ -ferret
 * " IGN provided an 8.3/10 score, noting that Banished suffered " - Rowan Kaiser is the reviewer from IGN, and Banished needs italicising
 * ✅ -ferret
 * "The Escapist gave the game 3.5/5 stars" - I think this is a magazine, so this too needs italicising
 * ✅ -ferret

This article looks solid. It is comprehensive for the subject and is informative. I recommended a few changes to the prose, particularly the third paragraph of the gameplay and using the names of reviewers. Once all of the above are clarified this should be good to go. JAG UAR   18:31, 29 December 2016 (UTC)
 * First pass of recommendations completed. Still need to check on status of mods. -- ferret (talk) 18:42, 29 December 2016 (UTC)
 * Mod support updated. -- ferret (talk) 23:42, 29 December 2016 (UTC)
 * I've read through the article again and it has been improved, so I'm happy that this meets the GA criteria now. Well done!  JAG  UAR   23:44, 29 December 2016 (UTC)