Talk:Barry (dog)/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Nikkimaria (talk) 13:35, 25 September 2010 (UTC)

Hello! I'll be reviewing this article for potential GA status. My review should be posted shortly. Cheers, Nikkimaria (talk) 13:35, 25 September 2010 (UTC)
 * I'm placing this article on hold for seven days to allow time for the below points to be addressed. Nikkimaria (talk) 01:00, 26 September 2010 (UTC)
 * Thanks for the review, I'll add notes below each line as I address them. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:10, 26 September 2010 (UTC)

Writing and formatting

 * "was a dog of a breed which was later called Saint Bernards" - linked article suggests "St. Bernard", and perhaps "the St. Bernard" rather than the plural?
 * Corrected to "the St. Bernard". Miyagawa   (talk)  09:10, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * "The first mention in the Great St Bernard Hospice archives of a dog was in 1707 which simply recorded "A dog was buried by us."" - simply said?
 * Done. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:11, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * "show that there were at least two variations of dog which lived at the hospice" -> "show that at least two variations of dog lived at the hospice". Also, variations = breeds?
 * Changed the line as suggested. Problem with identifying them as breeds was at the time the breeds of dog they used weren't named, and for all we know could have been complete mongrels as certainly from a couple of sources (which I'll work into the St. Bernard and Alpine Mastiff articles at another time) say that the monks pretty much grabbed dogs indiscriminately from the valleys when they ran out of dogs and didn't have any type of formulated breeding plan. I didn't put that level of detail in here as I thought I would have been wandering too much off topic. I've replaced variations with types as it just fits better in the sentence. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:20, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * "By 1800 it was known that a special kind of dog was being used for rescue work in the pass, but as yet did not have a name, and it was in that year which Barry was born" - grammar
 * Changed to "By 1800, in the year that Barry was born, it was known that a special kind of dog was being used for rescue work in the pass." - removed the line about not having a name as I added the line about the Küherhund afterwards and forgot to take that out. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:20, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * "weighing between 40–45 kilograms" (and similar) - if you want to include "between", you need to replace the dash with "and" or "to"
 * Cool, didn't know you could do that with the template. Done. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:26, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * "Barry was saved the lives of 40 people, but died while attempting to save his forty first" - grammar
 * Changed to "Barry saved the lives of forty people, but died while attempting to save his forty first". Dunno how that "was" snuck in there. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:30, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * Don't link the same term multiple times
 * Think I've cut it down now. Thanks for pointing it out, I think I had the Natural History Museum of Bern linked five times and hadn't noticed. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:29, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * What is "Kynology"?
 * Had to look into it, it's german for Cynology. It's the German Kennel Club, now known as Verband für das Deutsche Hundewesen. Miyagawa   (talk)  10:28, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * "when the term "St. Bernards" were first used for the breed and has been recognised since 1880" - grammar
 * Split into two sentences (and added a cite for the Swiss Kennel Club part). Miyagawa   (talk)  09:39, 26 September 2010 (UTC)

Accuracy and verifiability

 * Specific references should appear before general
 * Switched order. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:24, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * Retrieval date not needed for External links
 * Fixed. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:24, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * "Naturhistorishche Museum Der Burgergemeinde Bern" or "Naturhisorisches Museum Der Burgergeinde Bern"?
 * Fixed - it should be with the "s". Miyagawa   (talk)  09:40, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * Ref 15: published February of what year?
 * Fixed. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:39, 26 September 2010 (UTC)

Broad

 * Is any more information available about his career?
 * The only two legends attributed to him are listed, although while touching up a couple of other parts of this article I did manage to find what may have been the original source for his most famous rescue. While there is some additional details on the rescue on the Italian St. Bernard Club's website, their version talks about Barry wearing a barrel and gives some very precise information that no secondary sources just after Barry's death had - so I haven't included it as it's quite obvious that someone's made up those details at some point. All I've used that reference for is to link the Peter Scheitlin to the P. Scheitlin that the museum reference talks about, and for the quote.  Miyagawa   (talk)  11:39, 26 September 2010 (UTC)

Neutrality
No issues noted

Stability
No issues noted

Images

 * "A drawing Barry prior to the modifications conducted in 1923." - grammar
 * Fixed. Added some more context to the caption too. Miyagawa   (talk)  09:44, 26 September 2010 (UTC)


 * Check date of second image - according to the caption, the picture could not have been taken after 1998
 * That's somewhat of a conundrum for me. I've found multiple sources to say it's been removed, yet from the date of that image and others on Flickr, its still there. I've modified and added a cite to say it was removed, but that it's been replaced. Its just bizarre that the museum would go out of its way to explain that they never had brandy barrels around thier necks and then on the other hand go and put it back on the display. Miyagawa   (talk)  10:21, 26 September 2010 (UTC)