Talk:Battle of McDowell/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Peacemaker67 (talk · contribs) 05:37, 2 May 2020 (UTC)

Interesting little skirmish. I take it you are focussing mainly on Confederate victories? I have a few comments: That's all I have. Placing on hold for the above to be addressed. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 07:05, 3 May 2020 (UTC)
 * suggest adding the contemporary ranks of all commanders throughout, including in the lead (ie "Brigadier Generals Robert Milroy and Robert C. Schenck" etc)
 * I think I've caught all of them
 * "After McDowell, Jackson would defeated Union"
 * Done
 * "the Union high command ordered the majority o ut f Banks' command"
 * Done
 * the link to Richard Garnett is to a disambiguation page
 * Fixed
 * "the Union high command"
 * Fixed
 * suggest "that had been dispatched moved out earlier" if that is what is meant?
 * Done
 * "In April, Jackson would received"
 * Done
 * "and would be reinforced"→"and it was expected that he would be reinforced"
 * "departed their camps in the area of West View"
 * Fixed
 * "A road known as the Parkersburg and Staunton Turnpike ran through the area" could you say which direction it ran?
 * Added
 * where it kept up a regular fire? Battle hasn't been joined at this stage, so unless they were firing before the battle commenced, I suggest splitting this into the deployment of the guns here and moving this sentence fragment to the Battle section
 * The sources seem to indicate that they were firing before the battle started, for some odd reason. I guess since they had a decent idea that the enemy was out there somewhere, the just decided to lob some shells around and hope they hit something
 * "32 Ohio Infantry" etc is an odd usage, any reason you aren't using the ordinals? ie 32nd, you do later
 * Fixed, as well as with the other two regiments in the sentence
 * The Opposing forces section needs a cited summary of each order of battle, ie "The Union forces consisted of: one brigade under Milroy comprising seven regiments of infantry, two batteries of artillery and a cavalry regiment; and a brigade under Schenk comprising three infantry regiments, one artillery battery and one cavalry regiment." same for the Confederates
 * Added
 * given you will now have introduced the Confederate brigade commanders in the section above, just use surnames thereafter
 * Done
 * "from whence to which they could observe"
 * Done
 * "Confederate 's plans"
 * Done
 * "his line of on Sitlington's Hill"
 * Fixed
 * "conceal the Union position troops"
 * Done
 * suggest "The fighting became very fierce was very heavy" to avoid the duplication of "fierce"
 * Done
 * The Confederates would then received further reinforcements
 * Done. I have a bad habit of using would in such contexts.
 * "The fighting would ended around 9:00 pm"
 * Done
 * "Bull Pasture River.Jackson" needs a space
 * Done
 * " Brigadier General Johnson"
 * Removed the superfluous rank
 * "Jackson would continued his Valley campaign"
 * Fixed
 * "and he would then defeated Banks' main force"
 * Fixed
 * one citation is to Cozzens 1998, but I think this is supposed to be 2008?
 * Fixed
 * Tanner needs a location
 * I don't own the book, so I had to do some research online, but I think I have the right location.
 * what is the source of the information on File:Jackson Valley Campaign Part1.png?
 * I have no idea. It appears to have been in the article for over a decade, and the creator didn't state where they got their information from.  Removed.
 * - Thanks for the review. I believe I've handled everything, is there anything additional or something I missed? Hog Farm (talk) 19:45, 3 May 2020 (UTC)
 * This article is well-written, verifiable using reliable sources, covers the subject well, is neutral and stable, contains no plagiarism, and is illustrated by acceptably licensed images with appropriate captions. Passing. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 03:12, 5 May 2020 (UTC)