Talk:Battle of San Lorenzo

Copyedit notes
Hi

During the copyedit some points came to light:

Prelude:
 * "One column was led by San Martín, and the other by Justo Germán Bermúdez" - was this one column of royalist and one of "Argentinian"? (I suppose that should be "del Platoan" but that sounded wrong)
 * "This allowed Montevideo to endure" & "Montevideo organized a navy to destroy" & "Buenos Aires dismantled them" - If Montevideo/Buenos Aires can mean "a person", "city" or "region" then it should state which is meant here.

Battle:
 * "Escalada had made other actions against the royalists before this battle." - Is this sentence necessary? It seems to have no reason for being mentioned, such as "and so knew what to expect" or "and had made plans accordingly" etc.

Songs:
 * "weld-yellow" - needs explaining more?

Chaosdruid (talk) 04:14, 23 February 2011 (UTC)


 * The two columns are both from the United Provinces, as the pincer movement involves a two-colums attack rather than a single strong attacking line. But I acknowledge my mistake: I forgot to mention Zabala, leader of the royalists, in the lead. By the way, the term "Argentine" should be used with caution, the United Provinces are a predecesor state of Argentina, but not Argentina yet.
 * I don't understand the second point. Montevideo and Buenos Aires are, for the grammar purposes, nouns. "endure", "organize", "dismantle", are the verbs that these nouns perform. Is any of those verbs exclusive for the use of people and not cities, or the other way?
 * "Weld-Yellow" is one of the colours of the Flag of Spain. I think it seems evident from the context, but I linked the article for more clarification. MBelgrano (talk) 01:28, 24 February 2011 (UTC)
 * Hi again - the second point is me trying to work out who or what it is that the noun is referring to. Did someone called Montevideo, or did the city called Montevideo, or did the region called Montevideo do those things. Many readers will have heard of the city and would probably assume it was "This allowed the city of Montevideo to endure", "The city of Montevideo organised a navy" and "The city of Buenos Aires dismantled them". However it could have been a person or region named "Montevideo" who had done these things. It should be made clear which one it was that did these, "This allowed the city of Montevideo to endure" and "The citizens of Montevideo" - as for the last one "Buenos Aires dismantled them" was it the council and the militia?, did all the citizens participate?, etc.
 * I hope that makes my point a little more clear.
 * I have taken the liberty of linking the term weld-yellow. The concern was that it seems the usage of "weld" itself implies yellow. I say this because the flag page says it was red-weld which means red-yellow in effect. Chaosdruid (talk) 02:21, 24 February 2011 (UTC)


 * I have added a map of the zone, to help understanding the geographical side of the battle, and remind which are the cities involved here. MBelgrano (talk) 20:25, 25 February 2011 (UTC)

External links modified
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 * Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20101209085906/http://www.rgcgsm.ejercito.mil.ar:80/Dest_San_Lorenzo_Funciones.html to http://www.rgcgsm.ejercito.mil.ar/Dest_San_Lorenzo_Funciones.html
 * Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20101213081711/http://www.rgcgsm.ejercito.mil.ar:80/Dest_San_Lorenzo.html to http://www.rgcgsm.ejercito.mil.ar/Dest_San_Lorenzo.html
 * Added tag to http://www3.hcdn.gov.ar/folio-cgi-bin/om_isapi.dll?clientID=181029&advquery=1153-D-00&headingswithhits=on&infobase=tp.nfo&record=
 * Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20101209084856/http://www.rgcgsm.ejercito.mil.ar:80/Dest_San_Lorenzo_Pino_Hist.html to http://www.rgcgsm.ejercito.mil.ar/Dest_San_Lorenzo_Pino_Hist.html
 * Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20101028140435/http://www.sanmartiniano.gov.ar:80/textos/parte2/texto039.php to http://www.sanmartiniano.gov.ar/textos/parte2/texto039.php

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External links modified
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