Talk:Bellyache (Billie Eilish song)/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 08:19, 13 October 2020 (UTC)

I know you are not that active anymore but try to respond to changes once I suggest them in this review --K. Peake 08:19, 13 October 2020 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

 * Cover arts need alt text
 * Target R&B to Contemporary R&B
 * WP:OVERLINK of Billie Eilish under songwriters
 * Finneas O'Connell → Finneas under producers
 * Note that the song's title is stylised in lower case also
 * "by American singer Billie Eilish." → "by American singer Billie Eilish from her debut EP, Don't Smile At Me (2017)." with the wikilink
 * "was released on" → "was released as the EP's second single on" with the target
 * "and Finneas O'Connell, with production handled" → "and Finneas O'Connell, with production being handled" with the wikilink
 * ""Bellyache" is a midtempo electropop" → "A midtempo electropop" with the target
 * "R&B song, with hip hop," → "R&B song, it has hip hop," with the target
 * Why is there no sentence about critical reception as the last sentence of this para?
 * "The track was accompanied by a music video released" → "The song was accompanied by a music video, which was released" with the wikilink
 * "it depicts Eilish in" → "Eilish is depicted in"
 * "It entered the top 100 in" → "The song entered the top 100 of charts in"
 * "It was given double platinum certification by" → "It was certified double platinum in Australia, the United States, and Mexico by"
 * "and Mexican Association of Producers of Phonograms and Videograms, A.C. (AMPROFON)." → "and Mexican Association of Producers of Phonograms and Videograms, A.C. (AMPROFON), respectively."
 * "included the track on" → "included the song on"
 * "and 2020" → "and her 2020"

Background and release

 * "on Eilish's debut EP Don't Smile at Me through" → "from Eilish's debut EP Don't Smile at Me, through"
 * "Finneas O'Connell, the latter of which solely produced" → "Finneas O'Connell, known under his stage name of Finneas, with him solely producing"
 * "was handled by the studio personnel" → "were handled by studio personnel"
 * "stated that "Garbage", by" → "stated that "Garbage" (2013) by American rapper"
 * "for the song. "Garbage was" → "for the song: "'Garbage' was"
 * "It’s more graphic" → "It's more graphic"
 * "he’s been my" → "he's been my"
 * "A remix was" → "A remix of the song was"
 * "And that the" → "He continued, writing that the"

Composition and lyrics

 * Target midtempo to Tempo
 * Target R&B to Contemporary R&B
 * "It has influences" → "It has influences of"
 * "deep house and Latin macabre" → "deep house, and Latin macabre"
 * Target key to Key (music)
 * "at a moderate tempo" → "with a moderate tempo"
 * Remove wikilink on beats per minute
 * Wikilink acoustic guitar
 * Target chorus to Refrain
 * Target synth to Synthesizer
 * Where is the mention of synths?
 * "mentions that" → "mentioned that"
 * Wikilink pre-chorus per MOS:LINK2SECT
 * "by her childhood guilt she felt" → "by the childhood guilt Eilish felt"
 * "said that is about" → "said that the song is about"
 * "about a psychopath who kills those close to her," → "of a psychopath who kills those she is close to,"
 * "who's killed her friends" → "who has killed her friends"
 * ""Sittin' all alone..." the lyrics are not backed up by the citation
 * ""Maybe it's in the gutter..." same issue as above
 * "lyrics also reference the film" → "lyrics reference action film"
 * Add release year of the film in brackets
 * ""My V is for Vendetta..." the lyrics are not backed up by the citation

Critical reception

 * "received mostly positive reviews" → "was met with mostly positive reviews"
 * Target pop to Pop music
 * "mentions that whiile" → "noted that while Eilish's 2016 singles"
 * Remove target on pop in this sentence
 * "and mentions that it would be become" → "and admitted it would become"
 * "Mark Savage, lauded the song" → "Mark Savage lauded the song"
 * Target trap to Trap music
 * "And further mentions that" → "He elaborated, mentioning that"
 * "She concludes that it is" → "Almedia concluded by calling the song"
 * "remarked it as" → "described it as"
 * "The song placed" → "The song was placed"
 * "on Inisders Every Billie Eilish song, ranked," → "on Inisders Every Billie Eilish song, ranked list," per MOS:LINK2SECT
 * "and "dark" and that they" → "and "dark", commenting that they"
 * "and cites Eilish and Finneas" → "and prove Eilish and Finneas"

Commercial performance

 * "it peaked at number three" → "though it peaked at number three"
 * "of two million units based on sales and streams." → "of 2,000,000 certified units in the United States."
 * "number 66 on the ARIA Charts." → "number 66 on the ARIA Singles Chart."
 * "certification from the" → "certification by the"
 * "gold certification from the" → "gold certification by the"
 * "in the country." → "in the UK."
 * "platinum certification from" → "platinum certification by"

Music video

 * Img needs alt text and wikilink music video on the main text
 * "An accompanying music video for "Bellyache" was" → "An accompanying music video was" with the wikilink
 * "to Eilish's official YouTube channel" → "to Eilish's YouTube channel" with the wikilink
 * "it shows Eilish being stranded" → "Eilish is shown stranded"
 * "is dressed head to toe" → "is dressed from head to toe"
 * "It begins with Eilish walking" → "The video begins with Eilish walking"
 * Where is this sentence backed up?
 * "Eilish begins to recount" → "Eilish starts to recount"
 * "she has done." → "she has done,"
 * "forgetting about it." → "forgetting about it:"
 * "she throws dollar bills" → "Eilish throws dollar bills"

user:Kyle Peake, in the V source. The Ultimate Boss (talk) 04:50, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
 * Where is this sentence backed up?


 * "police officer eating a donut" → "police officer who is eating a donut"
 * Target Baton to Baton (law enforcement)
 * Where is this sentence backed up?
 * "Ian David Monroe writing for V magazine described" → "Ian David Monroe, writing for V magazine, described"
 * "compared Eilish's looks in the" → "compared Eilish's look in the"
 * "from the 2003 American film" → "in the 2003 American film"
 * "the choreography, saying" → "the choreography, saying that"
 * Target Complex to Complex (magazine) per MOS:LINK2SECT
 * "auctioned the yellow rain suit and jacket in February 2020 for 12,000 dollars."→ "auctioned an yellow rain suit and jacket nearly identical to the outfit worn by Eilish in the music video for 12,000 dollars in February 2020."
 * "Eilish's name is signed" → "Eilish's full name is signed"
 * Target Grammy award to Grammy Award

Live performances and other usage

 * "Eilish has performed..." remove since a section makes this obvious
 * Target acoustic to Acoustic music
 * "in the June of that year." → "in June of that year."
 * "on her live album" → "as part of her live album"
 * "In December 2019, Eilish performed "Ilomilo"..." remove this sentence as it is totally off-topic
 * "was also included on the setlist" → "was later included on the setlists"
 * "and Where Do We Go? World Tour (2020)." → "and her Where Do We Go? World Tour (2020)."
 * "Norwegian singer Sigrid, covered" → "Norwegian singer Sigrid covered"
 * "for the P3 session." → "for Sveriges Radio's P3 session." with the wikilink and target
 * "and features Sigrid" → "and noted that it features Sigrid"

Track listing

 * Retitle to Track listings

Personnel

 * Credits adapted from the album's liner notes. → Credits adapted from the EP's liner notes.
 * Use so there is the right space between credits and personnel

Weekly charts

 * The chart positions on the left should be under this sub-section, as you have the year-end charts one on the right

Year-end charts

 * Good

Certifications

 * Good

Final comments and verdict

 * but I have noticed your writing skills have improved a good amount over time, congratulations on this Wiki progress! --K. Peake 14:09, 13 October 2020 (UTC)

Kyle Peake, thank you so much for the review! Lmk if anything else needs to be done. The Ultimate Boss (talk) 04:50, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
 * Sorry about replying later; I went offline after responding to your review of "Wash Us in the Blood". ✅ for this article now though! --K. Peake 07:47, 15 October 2020 (UTC)