Talk:Bilingual kylix by the Andokides painter

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Carsonsisk.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 18:00, 17 January 2022 (UTC)

Peer review 1
Great article. Well organized and reliable information. It seemed unbiased and fair and very intriguing. Saw a few errors with commas in the second paragraph but other than that it really was a great piece.

Peer review 2
Hi Carsen, I’m Elizabeth from Greek Art and Archaeology class. You have a very well-written article here. I love your introduction paragraph, so nice job with that! I like how you discuss the technique in detail and the figures depicted on the kylix. I have a few suggestions for improvement if you want to use them: Your article would be stronger if you linked some of the topics you talk about to other Wikipedia pages, like “red figure technique” and “Siphnian Treasury.” (Do this through the link button in edit mode.) Also, try to relate the figures on the kylix more to the subject of warfare as it relates to ancient Greek culture. It would also be nice to have a description of what normal kylikes look like and are used for. Tiny grammar things: Your title needs a space in between Andokides and Painted; re-read and check for commas you may be missing like before conjunctions; and the phrase “…can be traced through the subject of the struggle for…” is awkward and could be rephrased. Other than that, you did a great job and I love your last sentence. ElizabethAcors (talk) 16:53, 3 November 2017 (UTC)

Comments from Prof. Paga
Hi Carson - this is a solid article! There are a few things you could do to improve it: Jpaga (talk) 14:20, 21 November 2017 (UTC)
 * Be careful about what tense you use, past vs. present (ex: "created" but then "produces" in the first paragraph)
 * Make the connection to your group's theme more explicit. Just reading your article, I had no idea which group you were in.  You need to make the connection to warfare in Greek art much more clear and specific.  This might mean including more information and description of the kylix, information about the tondo of the cup, or more information about hoplite warfare / shields / trumpeters / etc.