Talk:Bill Keating (politician)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Khazar2 (talk · contribs) 22:53, 8 July 2013 (UTC)

Hi Designate, I'll be glad to take this one. Sorry you've had to wait so long for a review. I'm hoping to complete initial comments on it tonight, but if not, they should be done in the next 1-3 days. Just as a heads-up, I plan to be mostly on wikibreak from July 12-19, so we may need to take a break mid-review. -- Khazar2 (talk) 22:53, 8 July 2013 (UTC)

Initial comments
This looks good overall and ripe for promotion. Thanks for your work to bring it to this point. I have a few quibbles, noted below, and made a few tweaks; let me know your thoughts:


 * " he immediately replaced one-third of the office's staff, including two top officials." -- this may be worded too strongly, as the source suggests some may have left voluntarily.
 * "The move was widely regarded as" -- This also seems a bit strong. The sources say " There were accusations reported in the press" and "reports of a nasty overhaul in the office ", respectively. How about "Press reports criticized the move as ..."
 * "was shot down by" -- mildly idiomatic, should probably be rewritten per WP:IDIOM
 * "Keating sits on the House Homeland Security Committee as well as the Foreign Affairs Committee" -- this could use an "as of", as this is information that might change from year to year without being updated
 * "promising to fight Don't Ask Don't Tell " -- it seems a little outdated to talk of this as an ongoing process.
 * "National Right to Carry Reciprocity Act of 2011" -- it would help clarity to add a phrase explaining what this is -- Khazar2 (talk) 23:30, 8 July 2013 (UTC)


 * Hey, thanks for taking this up. I agree with your points so far. —Designate (talk) 23:24, 9 July 2013 (UTC)
 * All your fixes look good. Let me run the final checklist. -- Khazar2 (talk) 02:00, 10 July 2013 (UTC)