Talk:Black-chinned sparrow/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 18:30, 3 May 2021 (UTC)

Comments That's it for a first pass, so on hold for now. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 10:23, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * Just having that one ref in the lead is odd, could easily be moved into the main body.
 * That comes from the DYK requirement that the common name be referenced on its first appearance. Shall I remove it? MeegsC (talk) 13:00, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * Yeah, as long as the name is referenced in the main body, it doesn't need to be in the article. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 13:03, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * Okay – moved that ref down into the taxonomy section.
 * "small parties" I like it, but groups would seem more appropriate?
 * Changed to groups.
 * "other Spizella species" shouldn't the fact that it itself is a member of the spizella species be noted earlier?
 * The scientific name is Spizella atrogularis, which is right at the beginning. Should I explain that more directly?
 * I don't see why not. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 13:03, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * Added genus to first sentence.
 * You link egg but not rufous or nestling. I would do it the other way round.
 * Unlinked egg. Changed "rufous" to "reddish-brown" and wikilinked "nestling".
 * "huge range" huge seems odd to me, perhaps vast?
 * Changed to very large.
 * Arizona black-chinned sparrow etc should be created as plausible redirects to this article.✅
 * "7.75 in (19.7 cm)" this is very precise, all black-chinned sparrows have identical (to the nearest 1/100th of an inch!) wingspans?
 * removed the convert templates and converted to fractions to reduce precision in measurements; modified some other convert templates to a single significant figure
 * "notched tail.[4][17] The tail is proportionately" merge, i.e. "notched tail which is proportionately" ✅
 * "Recently fledglings may" that's a dab page.
 * Fixed: linked to fledgling (birds).
 * What's a scapular?
 * Linked.
 * "It has two song types.[19] The song" song or songs?
 * I removed the comment about two song types. The only article I found this info in didn't explain it further.
 * ping pong -> table tennis.
 * Not sure about this one. It's an American bird, and the Americans call it ping-pong.
 * Really?? Even in things like the Olympics?  The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 13:03, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * Undoubtedly in the Olympics it's called "table tennis". To be honest, I never saw an Olympic-level table tennis match until I moved to the UK. It never made the US coverage. Maybe that's changed now. But certainly it's more widely known (among those who aren't club/Olympic/professional players anyway) as ping pong.
 * Where are the synonyms in the infobox referenced? They're not mentioned in the article.
 * D'oh! Added ref.
 * "and Utah, [21] and" no space before ref. ✅
 * "in edge habitat" what is "edge habitat"?
 * I've wikilinked it. Is that enough, or should I explain it here instead?
 * "Chihuahuan Desert " capital D. ✅
 * "Brewer's or chipping sparrows" that's overlinked. Is there a separate article for Brewer's sparrows?
 * Removed second link to chipping sparrow. Brewer's is already linked higher up too.
 * " it is an inconspicuous species" vs "males pick conspicuous, exposed perches" hard to align the two.
 * I'm not sure how to change the wording here. Generally, it's very inconspicuous: it usually stays in deep cover. However, hormones are a wonderful thing, and during the breeding season, the males sit right up on top of bushes to sing. It's about the only time it's easy to see them!
 * I guess it's just worth emphasising that the male's conspicuous behaviour is as a result of mating season? The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 13:03, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * How does it look now?
 * get->obtain. ✅
 * "declined at a rate " presumably this was an average rate.
 * The source article says The 56 BBS routes in the United States which encounter this species produce a statistically significant trend for the 1966-2003 period of -5.1% population change per year. Though they don't specifically say "average", I'll add it to our article, on the basis that they looked over a range of years.
 * Ref 6: pp. ✅
 * Ref 39: p? ✅
 * ISBNs should be consistently formatted.
 * Updated the single 10-digit ISBN.
 * Thanks for the review . I think I've addressed your concerns, except (perhaps) for "ping pong". MeegsC (talk) 13:00, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * Couple of replies. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 13:03, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * - better? MeegsC (talk) 13:38, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * nice work, I enjoyed reading the article and I'm happy to promote now my nitpicks have been addressed. Cheers. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 14:47, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
 * Thanks for the review, and for helping to make the article a better one! MeegsC (talk) 09:53, 5 May 2021 (UTC)