Talk:Blair Swannell/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Brad78 (talk) 13:02, 30 August 2010 (UTC)

Some initial thoughts
 * Personal history
 * I know his date of birth is in the lead and infobox, but is there any reason not to include it in the first line of the personal section? It looks a bit vague just to list his year of birth there.
 * Removed. ✅ FruitMonkey (talk) 21:13, 30 August 2010 (UTC)
 * Do you know if he had any siblings?
 * Found that info. ✅ FruitMonkey (talk) 21:13, 30 August 2010 (UTC)
 * Why did he make his first trip to Australia? Is there any significance to this? I suspect so given his links later in life.
 * Article now states 'as a mate on a schooner'. It was his occupation. FruitMonkey (talk) 09:06, 31 August 2010 (UTC)


 * Rugby career
 * I suspect Tests is correct with a capital, but I'm unsure Third in Third Test should be capitalised.
 * It changes from book to book and site to site, but have made lower case. ✅ FruitMonkey (talk) 09:06, 31 August 2010 (UTC)
 * Do you have any stats for his career
 * We have found statistics for his Northampton career, but although appearing pretty solid is not acceptable by Wikipedia standards. We could place them in, but would be unable to attach a source. FruitMonkey (talk) 17:35, 31 August 2010 (UTC)


 * Unsourced sections
 * There were previously two "citation needed" tags which need addressing.
 * Both addressed. One by removal (until we can re-find) the source, and the second reworded and cited. ✅ FruitMonkey (talk) 09:06, 31 August 2010 (UTC)
 * I've added a third such tag which probably needs a reference.
 * Reference given for the match. ✅ FruitMonkey (talk) 21:15, 30 August 2010 (UTC)
 * The second paragraph of the rugby career section is entirely unreferenced.
 * References added. ✅ FruitMonkey (talk) 09:06, 31 August 2010 (UTC)


 * Chronology
 * I understand why you've written this into two succinct sections. However, I'm not sure it works flitting from early army career to his later army career and death then back to rugby career in the middle. Do you have any thoughts on this?
 * It's difficult to cog the work together, but we have now moved the Gallipoli campaign to the end. So at least the article finishes with his death. Is this more acceptable? FruitMonkey (talk) 06:59, 2 September 2010 (UTC)

Here's my first thoughts on the review. I hope you can look at these suggestions or make some changes. Brad78 (talk) 13:19, 30 August 2010 (UTC)


 * GA review (see here for criteria)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * see comments above about unsourced sentences/passages
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * see couple of comments above about extra information, though I doubt this is going to be key to a pass/fail
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * Brad78 (talk) 13:25, 30 August 2010 (UTC)
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * Brad78 (talk) 13:25, 30 August 2010 (UTC)
 * Brad78 (talk) 13:25, 30 August 2010 (UTC)

Looks really good. Thanks for getting back on all my queries, and for the expansion. Couple of final points: Once, they're done, I'll come back for one final look. Brad78 (talk) 23:07, 2 September 2010 (UTC)
 * Should it be SS Afric or SS Africa?
 * Some of the reference titles are all in caps. Even if that's the title of the web page, it should be lower case as per WP:ALLCAPS.
 * Yeah, FM's edit got me there too - it is SS Afric. Shows up in the service record: go to page 44 - I also searched for the actual ship by that name, and it confirmed the name. The hastily converted a vessel to be a troop transport, and it was subsequently sunk by a torpedo in the Mediterranean. I was not sure what policy was with ALL cap titles in citations. I will change them to lower case. Thanks for taking the time to review the article. SauliH (talk) 06:01, 5 September 2010 (UTC)

Thanks to you both for all the work, and some great expansion during the GAN process. This is a very tidy, interesting piece of work especially on a player from the past. You've done some great research on it, and you should both be proud of this piece of work.

Everything above is now in order, and all the GA criteria have been passed. I'm not sure how much more work would needed to get this to FAC, but perhaps it might be worth a shot, even as simply a peer review or suggestions at the appropriate projects (military history and rugby union) to see what else can be achieved.

Thanks very much for a lovely piece of work and your help in the GA process. Brad78 (talk) 20:55, 5 September 2010 (UTC)