Talk:Blind Willie Johnson/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Cartoon network freak (talk · contribs) 22:50, 31 October 2016 (UTC)

Coming soon... Best, Cartoon network freak (talk) 22:50, 31 October 2016 (UTC)

Lead

 * in the 1960s, due to his → remove comma
 * both efforts spearheaded by Charters → both efforts being spearheaded by Chaarters
 * practitioners of the blues → remove "blues"
 * is also highly praised → which was highly acclaimed

Infobox

 * For genres, occupations and instruments, use a flat list.
 * 1920s-1945 → 1920s–1945

Early life and career

 * instrument: a cigar → instrument—a cigar
 * Little else seems to be known about Johnson's childhood but at some point → While few other information is known about the singer's childhood, he met another blind musician at some point named...

Recording sessions

 * evangelist with "remarkable → evangelist with a "remarkable
 * most established → most-established
 * best exemplifies his unique guitar playing in regular tuning in Open D for slide → place "best" at the end of the sentence
 * and according to Harris he → and—according to Harris—he
 * according to Johnson biographer → according to Johnson's biographer
 * spectating Johnson perform → spectating Johnson performing
 * journeyed to Atlanta with Harris → add comma before "with Harris"
 * in 1932; however, Johnson → in 1932, but Johnson

Later life and death

 * of that cemetery → of the cemetery

Musical style

 * Sam Charters in the liner notes to the compilation album The Complete Blind Willie Johnson wrote Johnson, in fact, was → Sam Charters wrote in the liner notes of his compilation album The Complete... that, in fact, Johnson was
 * Johnson's style: "opposed → Johnson's style as being "opposed
 * Johnson also delivered in his → Johnson also delivered vocals in his

Legacy

 * was included because, according to Sagan → was included, as—according to Sagan—

Outcome
AWESOME article!! You did a fantastic job on it ! I've put this to allow fine-tuning edits on the page before passing to GA. Best regards and good luck, Cartoon network freak (talk) 23:00, 3 November 2016 (UTC)
 * thank you for the review. I made the changes as asked, but I have questions about the last two alterations you suggest in the lead. Shouldn't the "blues" be kept in the sentence so readers know specifically what Johnson was a "practioner" of? Also, could you re-read your fourth recommendation because I read it over and over, and it just does not make sense to me in the sentence. Other than that, I am happy to say I like how the article turned out, especially when I consider the shape it was in not too long ago. Thank you again!TheGracefulSlick (talk) 23:43, 3 November 2016 (UTC)
 * Hi there again! In the first case, I just wanted to say that you should remove overfluous "the", but I have made a mistake by writing "blues" instead. My fourth recommendation is meant to be a better solution for saying that his work was "praised", but if you think your is better, then just keep it;) Finally, I'm gladly passing this AWESOME article, and I'm going to fix the problem with "the" before enlisting this. Best regards and congrats, Cartoon network freak (talk) 06:41, 4 November 2016 (UTC)