Talk:Blow Your Mind (Mwah)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 08:58, 31 July 2020 (UTC)

So I'm reviewing one of your articles once again; thought I'd do this since you have three song nominees currently pending review. --K. Peake 08:58, 31 July 2020 (UTC)

Infobox and lead
✅
 * Infobox looks good, apart from the lack of streaming under release formats
 * "and it's producer Jon Levine." → "and its producer Jon Levine."
 * "It was released through" → "The song was released for digital download and streaming through" with the appropriate targets
 * Target single to Single (music)
 * "and impacted contemporary hit radio" → "and later impacted contemporary hit radio"
 * ""Blow Your Mind (Mwah)" is an" → "It is an"
 * Target tropical to Tropical music
 * Target synths to Synthesizer
 * "was met with generally positive reviews" → "received generally positive reviews"
 * "gave Lipa her first US Billboard Hot 100 entry, where it reached number 72." → "her first US Billboard Hot 100 entry by reaching number 72."
 * "number 23 at US Pop Radio" → "number 23 on the US Mainstream Top 40 chart" with the appropriate wikilink since that is its name
 * "It received a gold and platinum certification" → "It was certified gold and platinum in the US and the United Kingdom"
 * "The song additionally entered..." remove this sentence
 * "London's Barbican Centre and features" → "London's Barbican Centre, and features" with the wikilink
 * "posing and walking around the area." → "posing in the area, as well as walking around."
 * "The video is a" → "According to Lipa, the video is a"
 * "Lipa also promoted the single with live performances at BBC Radio 1's live lounge" → "Lipa further promoted the song in 2016 with live performances for BBC Radio 1's Live Lounge" with the wikilink
 * "and Karma Kid as well as an acoustic" → "and Karma Kid, as well as an acoustic" with the target

Background and release

 * "Levine also handling the production." → "Levine solely handling the production."
 * "Lipa was inspired after" → "Lipa was inspired for the song after"
 * "on 26 August of that year as the fifth single" → "and streaming two days later as the fifth single" with the targets
 * "her eponymous debut studio album, along" → "Dua Lipa, along"
 * "The song impacted" → "The song was serviced to"
 * Add what dates the radio releases were
 * "was also serviced to that radio format in" → "was released via the same radio format in both"
 * "released 2 June 2017." → "released on 2 June 2017."
 * Target acoustic to Acoustic music
 * "Night Moves and Black Saint" → "Night Moves, and Black Saint"
 * Mention the release dates of the acoustic version and remixes; maybe write the acoustic was simultaneous with the initial single release and then state the release date exactly of the remixes ep?
 * Target handclaps to Clap
 * Targeted to Clapping, Clap is a disambiguation page. LOVI  33  16:46, 2 August 2020 (UTC)

✅
 * That's fine, my bad with the mistake initially sorry. --K. Peake 17:38, 2 August 2020 (UTC)

Music and lyrics

 * Target synths to Synthesizer on the audio sample text
 * Sure you shouldn't expand the sample's text?
 * Do you mean TimedText? If so, added. LOVI  33  17:26, 2 August 2020 (UTC)
 * That is a neat addition, though I meant to expand the main text possibly? --K. Peake 17:38, 2 August 2020 (UTC)
 * It's already pretty long but I'll expand it, adding all the production elements mentioned in the paragraphs. LOVI  33  17:43, 2 August 2020 (UTC)


 * "nu-disco song with tropical beats and" → "nu-disco song, with tropical beats alongside"
 * "and span from" → "and range from"
 * Doesn't the lyrics sentence belong in the ending para instead?
 * Usually yes, but I was analyzing the lyrics from every part of the song so for the first paragraph, I just wrote it for the song as a whole, then the other paragraphs are about the different parts of the song.: verse, chorus, pre-chorus. LOVI  33  17:26, 2 August 2020 (UTC)

✅
 * "synths and echoing tribal drums." → "synths, and echoing tribal drums."
 * Target verse to Verse (music) per MOS:LINK2SECT
 * "at one time she wasn't." → "at one time she was not."
 * Wikilink pre-chorus
 * "was crazy for it as well as commenting how people think she's" → "was crazy for it, as well as commenting that people think she has"
 * "have just gotten bigger." → "have only gotten bigger."
 * "Vocally, she blows a kiss" → "Vocally, Lipa blows a kiss"
 * "in the heat of an argument," → ""in the heat of an argument,""
 * "meaning they've chosen her because they wouldn't" → "meaning that they have chosen Lipa because they would not"
 * "Lipa addresses the person, stating" → "Lipa addresses the lover, showing that"

Critical reception

 * "Idolator's Rachel Sonis labeled it "feisty" and went on to say" → "Sonis labeled it "feisty" and said"
 * "state that it" → "state that the song"
 * "and "infectious"" → "and "infectious.""
 * "Mike Nied of the same website labelled it" → "Mike Nied, also of Idolator, labelled the song"
 * "Raúl Guillén of Jenesaispop however enjoyed" → "However, Raúl Guillén of Jenesaispop enjoyed"
 * "writing it's" → "writing that it is"
 * "named it the 73rd best song of 2016, praising it's combination" → "later named it the 73rd best song of 2016, praising the combination"
 * "calling it's chorus "casual and fresh" and" → "calling the chorus "casual and fresh," while"
 * "in-your-face" and" → "in-your-face" as well as"
 * "called the song" → "viewed the song as"
 * "criticized it's lack of longevity writing its" → "criticized the lack of longevity, writing that it is"
 * "Rick Pearson for" → "Rick Pearson from"
 * "as well as comparing it" → "and compared it"
 * "and wrote it" → "and wrote that it"
 * "concluded by stating "[t]here isn’t" → "concluded by stating, "[t]here isn't"
 * "Billboard called the song" → "The staff of Billboard called the song"
 * Shouldn't the closing para be ordered so the positive reviews come before mixed/negative ones?
 * Re-ordered. LOVI  33  17:40, 2 August 2020 (UTC)

✅

Commercial performance
✅
 * "In the United Kingdom, "Blow Your Mind (Mwah)" debuted at" → ""Blow Your Mind (Mwah)" debuted at"
 * "becoming her second entry on the chart" → "becoming Lipa's second entry on the chart,"
 * Add release year of the song in brackets
 * "reached a peak of 30 and lasted for an additional eight weeks after that." → "reached a peak of number 30 and lasted for an additional eight weeks afterwards."
 * "the song received a platinum certification from the" → "the song was certified platinum by the"
 * "for selling over 600,000 units." → "for selling 600,000 units in the UK."
 * "to eventually peak at" → "and eventually peaked at"
 * "The single was more successful" → "The song was more successful"
 * "and reached a peak of 15." → "and later reached a peak of number 15."
 * "in Australia, where it reached a peak of 59." → "of Australia, on which it reached number 59."
 * "In the United States, "Blow Your Mind (Mwah)"" → "In the US, "Blow Your Mind (Mwah)""
 * "and only lasted one week." → "though the song only lasted one week."
 * "it reached number 23 on US Pop Radio," → "it reached number 23 on the US Mainstream Top 40 chart," with the wikilink
 * Remove target on Billboard
 * "the song received a gold certification from the" → "the song was certified gold by the"
 * "for selling over 500,000 units." → "for sales of 500,000 certified units in the US."

Background
✅
 * Wikilink music video
 * "and filmed in London's Barbican Centre." → "and filmed at the Barbican Centre in London."
 * "Tawan Kedkong as well as Lipa's friends" → "Tawan Kedkong, and Lipa's friends"
 * "Lipa stated" → "Lipa stated that"
 * "It’s like the girl" → "It's like the girl"

Synopsis and reception

 * "through a megaphone with" → "through a megaphone, accompanied by" on the img main text with the wikilink, plus are you sure she was not singing?
 * "speaking" → "singing". LOVI  33  18:05, 2 August 2020 (UTC)


 * "The video opens with Lipa" → "The music video opens with Lipa"
 * "the girls were noted for having individualistic appearances." → "the girls appear in a manner that was noted for being individualistic."
 * The bench statement does not appear to be backed up, unless it has been worded differently and I did not look properly
 * "They chew gum" → "The group chew gum"
 * "blow bubbles as" → "blow bubbles, as"
 * This sentence appears not to be backed up; I will not instate this for every sentence that has not been done so, I assume you can back any unsourced ones up yourself
 * "where Lipa walks backwards singing" → "where Lipa walks backwards while singing"
 * Target rainbow flag to Rainbow flag (LGBT)
 * "and signs that say" → "alongside signs that say"
 * "and "You Can Sit With Us."" → "and "You Can Sit With Us"."
 * "goes to a roof top where" → "go to a roof top on which"
 * "with the song's title" → "with the song's title on it"
 * "Mike Nied of Idolator called the visual a" → "Nied called the visual a"
 * "V, viewed it" → "The staff of V viewed the video"
 * "Bianca Gracie stated the" → "Bianca Gracie stated that the"
 * "In Coup De Main Magazine, Rose Riddell" → "In Coup De Main Magazine, Rose Riddell"
 * "DIY stated that the video makes London look like paradise." → "The staff from DIY stated that the video makes London look like a paradise."
 * My mistake for the unsourced ones. I sourced it all at the end because I didn't want to repeat the same citation so many times. It is the I Want My Pop Culture source. Should I add it in everywhere that applies? LOVI  33  18:05, 2 August 2020 (UTC)

✅

Credits and personnel
✅
 * Promonews should be italicised
 * Use so there is the right space between credits and personnel

Live performances
✅
 * "in 2016 and 2017 as well as the" → "in 2016 and 2017, respectively, as well as at the"
 * "in BBC Radio 1's live lounge," → "on BBC Radio 1's Live Lounge," with the wikilink
 * "On 13 October, she performed" → "On 13 October of that year, she performed the song"
 * "she performed the song" → "Lipa performed the song"
 * "On 29 November 2016, she performed the song on American talk show Today." → "She performed the song for American talk show Today on 29 November 2016."
 * "She also performed the song in a session" → "Lipa performed the song during a session"
 * "she performed it in" → "she performed it for"

Track listings
✅
 * Maybe add streaming to the titles of the digital downloads?
 * Remove target on EP

Credits and personnel
✅
 * Use spaced ndash so there is the right space between credits and personnel
 * Sub-sections should be sub-headings instead

Weekly charts

 * Target Gaon to Gaon Music Chart
 * Remove Ukraine per WP:CHARTS
 * Are you sure the Venezuela chart is English?
 * "Venezuela English" → "Venezuela"

✅

Year-end charts

 * Good

Certifications
✅
 * Only double-dagger should be cited at the bottom of the table

Release history
✅
 * Add streaming next to digital download with the target
 * Digital download (second mention) → Digital EP
 * Remixes EP → Remixes

Final comments and verdict

 * Unfortunately did not finish this today, sorry but I am really tired though will definitely wrap up the review tomorrow. --K. Peake 21:10, 31 July 2020 (UTC)
 * after taking a look through at what was remaining. --K. Peake 07:03, 1 August 2020 (UTC)
 * Hey, thanks so much for reviewing this article. I have addressed all your comments. Is there anything else you need me to do? LOVI  33  19:55, 2 August 2020 (UTC)
 * Much thanks, I fixed the issue with the ref in the music video section and you can take a look at that here. ✅ time for this article now though after that brief copy editing! --K. Peake 20:27, 2 August 2020 (UTC)