Talk:Brandon Graham/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: -- Will C  06:54, 14 November 2009 (UTC)


 * GA review (see here for criteria)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * It is too much about the man's career, and not enough about the person's life. More information on his childhood, personnel life, etc would be nice.-- Will C  03:54, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * I am fairly certain that I have taken more current college athletes to WP:GA level than anyone else. What you will notice about the ones I have done (Brandon Minor, Tate Forcier, Obi Ezeh, Manny Harris, DeShawn Sims, Louie Caporusso, and maybe a few others) is that I exhaust the sources finding the earliest details about their public life.  This is no different.  At this point in his life there is no readily accessible public record that predates what I am presenting.  Yes we would like to know stories about his days as an infant and toddler, but that is not possible.  Look at all the WP:FAs about athletes and try to find anywhere near as much about the high school and college careers as I present and you will be disappointed.  His personal life would be included if he had controversial events that made the news.  I have read just about every newspaper article written about this guy and further detail is not something that I think you can reasonably ask for.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 04:10, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * It would've been easier to just say "I've looked and looked, and that is all the information I have found on his life outside of football.". I would've replied "Understandable, the more information on his personnel life was ony requested so the article seemed more like a true bio and not a summary of just his career."-- Will C  04:16, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * College athletes are tough to bring up to WP:GA standard because to do a good job you have to read dozens of newspaper articles just to piece together a something about his early life. There is really not much that we can say other than that he went to an underfunded school and played football from an early age.  For athletes at this stage of life, this type of work is considered GA-level, from my experience.  I do wish I could say more about his family and non-football life.  The newpapers don't say much.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 04:25, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Understandable-- Will C  06:59, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * Pass/Fail:


 * Lead
 * Infobox
 * Would like the info sourced, since some of it may not be mentioned later.-- Will C  03:54, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Anything in the WP:LEAD should be a summary of the main text. If you notice something in the LEAD that is not in the main body, point it out that is a mistake.  It should be cited in the main body and citing it in the LEAD is unnecessary.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 04:03, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * I don't see anything about his birth in the main text from a small skim.-- Will C  04:16, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Fixed with "Born and raised in Detroit"--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 04:27, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * "Graham attempts to sack Terrell Pryor during 2008 Michigan – Ohio State rivalry game." → "Graham attempts to tackle (sack is jargon, best to avoid until it is explained in the article) Terrell Pryor during the 2008 Michigan – Ohio State rivalry encounter."
 * The alternative is tackle, which is also jargon. In either case, the word is linked which should lessen the problem. Let me know what you want.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 04:20, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Well tackle is used in many sports and used as a plain term in common life. I wouldn't see it as jargon, as much as sack. It would be more of a neutral term for ones unfamiliar with football. Best to keep it understandable to all readers so they don't have to go searching around.-- Will C  06:59, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Swapped the jargon here and in two other articles on WP that use the image.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 07:12, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Good enough I suppose.-- Will C  09:28, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Prose
 * "Brandon Lee Graham (born April 3, 1988 in Detroit, Michigan) is an American football defensive end." Ref please, mainly for the name, birth day, and birth place.-- Will C  03:54, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * O.K.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 04:14, 19 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Thanks-- Will C  09:28, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * High school
 * Fine.-- Will C  09:28, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Lloyd Carr era
 * "Although projected to as the starter, Graham played sparringly in the September 1 the opening game loss to two-time defending FCS champion Appalachian State Mountaineers." → "Although projected to as the starter, Graham played sparringly in the opening game loss to two-time defending FCS champions Appalachian State Mountaineers on September 1."-- Will C  09:28, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Not sure about the "s" added to champion, but fixed nonetheless.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 14:18, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * ""Brandon, he needs to get focused in,"" The word "in" I don't think is needed in this quote.-- Will C  09:28, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Fixed.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 14:15, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Rich Rodriguez era
 * "However, several players had more games to play so he has not clinched the championship." Seems to be borderline crystal imo. Plus isn't sourced, so best to remove until he wins it, if he does.-- Will C  09:28, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Since I gave an example of Schofield. I will link to Wisconsins page which will post their Bowl game as soon as it is announced.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR) 14:21, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * Notes
 * Fine-- Will C  09:28, 24 November 2009 (UTC)
 * External links
 * Fine-- Will C  09:28, 24 November 2009 (UTC)

Award information
If an entire list of awards is of encyclopedic value in the lead, then there is no justification for the deletion of sourced material concerning the only national player trophy won by this player in college. Unjustified deletion of sourced material is a possible violation of Wikipedia policies and WP:NPOV. Obamafan70 (talk) 04:43, 14 January 2010 (UTC)