Talk:Briarcliff High School

Untitled
This article is vague, poorly written, and overly self-promotional. I say this as a person that went to Briarcliff High School. As of July 2008, there is nothing of any real substance on this page, but instead some self-congratulatory nostalgic blather about past athletic teams that Briarcliff (not to mention the wider world) has already forgotten. For the most part, this article could stand to be totally re-written. —Preceding unsigned comment added by 76.74.90.189 (talk) 20:45, 8 July 2008 (UTC)

More information
I don't know where to put this, but it should be noted somewhere in the article about the open room in the school called the Maresca where students study surrounded by teacher's offices. Citation: --  ɱ    (talk  ·  vbm)  22:15, 27 January 2015 (UTC)
 * Somewhere in the Courses section, probably. It seems most related to the actual classes/studying students at this school might do. Bob Amnertiopsis ∴ChatMe! 05:43, 28 January 2015 (UTC)
 * Thanks mate; I'm surprised anyone read this, nonetheless answered. Most of my Briarcliff work is independent and requires pursuing answers and review assistance from others, and I've written quite a few questions and comments on the Briarcliff articles' talk pages, ones that might only get replies years from now.-- ɱ    (talk  ·  vbm)  05:56, 28 January 2015 (UTC)
 * As for the information here, it might best fit in in "Courses", but I don't think it fits very well there. Someday I might create a "Profile" or "Overview" section; for now I've been stuffing all that in the lead. Such a section could easily also mention the Maresca.-- ɱ    (talk  ·  vbm)  05:59, 28 January 2015 (UTC)
 * I keep all the pages I've reviewed for GA on my watchlist which is pretty much the only reason I was able to respond so quickly. It feels like the Maresca fact would fall under the purview of an Academics section (which is a titch broader than Courses) or maybe a Facilities section (which is sort of covered in History right now). Bob Amnertiopsis ∴ChatMe! 15:41, 28 January 2015 (UTC)
 * Thanks; I added it and will clean up a bit more later.-- ɱ    (talk  ·  vbm)  16:24, 28 January 2015 (UTC)

Copy edit
As I go through the article, I will place any major concerns here. I will also make notes regarding the Featured Article checklist. Please remember, however, that I am not one of the FA reviewers, but rather just trying to find what I can before you send it over to the eagle-eyed folks at FA. -Pax85 (talk) 05:14, 12 June 2015 (UTC)

Featured article checklist
1a. Well-written - Overall, very good, although I provided comments where I thought necessary below. Be sure to watch tenses too, as the history section, particularly towards the end got a bit confusing.

1b. Comprehensive - Everything is here, although the sports details need to be verified and made viewable in the article. The last paragraph in the theater section can probably be split and expanded into awards and past production practices. I would recommend placing the awards last in the section.

1c. Well-researched - Definitely well-researched, but could use some updating in some spots, such as for the administration and the currently-hidden sports text.

1d. Neutral - Seems fine

1e. Stable: Article content seems subject to no edit wars, and has been stable with few major edits over the past 5 months.

2a. Lead: Overall, seems to be a very good summary of the article. Can the administration information be updated in the first paragraph, or somehow reflected that the same administration is still in place? For example, "Since 2014, the principal has been..." The current wording leaves it a bit ambiguous since we are well into 2015. Also, the wording in the first sentence of the second paragraph gets a bit awkward. Unless you want to mention test scores specifically, I think you should say this: "Briarcliff is noted for outstanding student achievement and academic accomplishments", and proceed with the rest of the list from there.

2b. Appropriate structure - As I mentioned below, I think a bit of restructuring for the extracurricular activities may be very helpful, using Stuyvesant High School as an example. This will lend the article to easier expansion in the future, and help keep everything organized. 2c.

3. Media - All seems OK here. All media is either free-use, or has been deemed appropriate under fair-use conditions.

4. Length - The length could be a bit longer, but this will be helped with some expansion the sports section, theater section, and other smaller recommendations. Try to be exhaustive but not wordy!

History
The topic sentence for the second paragraph seems a bit out of place, since the article focuses on facilities up to this point. I'm not sure it needs to be mentioned here at all, but could be mentioned in an "extracurriculars" section. I think a terrific example of how to handle extracurriculars can be found in this featured article. It might mean a bit of restructuring after the copy edit is finished, but the actual content should remain relatively unscathed; it will also result in more room for logical expansion.

Towards the end, it gets a bit confusing, as the article moves between present and past events. Try to keep the entire history section in past tense, and if you need to move to the present, make sure dates and times of construction are very clear. For example, the article mentions that the new hockey field will be finished by Labor Day. I assume it meant Labor Day 2015, but I am not sure.

The History section was very extensive, but most of it was about building improvements, which can get a bit dry. What about history of the people and programs themselves? -Pax85 (talk) 04:51, 14 June 2015 (UTC)

The early 1980s witnessed the rise of advanced science and math teaching at Briarcliff High School. Though there was declining enrollment and a developing recession, spirits remained high. Physics teacher Mr. Eisencraft [?] besides being featured in a Scientific American article, taught advanced Physics, as well as regular (Regents) Physics. We had, at the time, usually two A.P. courses offered: one by Dr. Farrell on American History, and the other, Calculus. However, for the 1981 - 1982 school year, a third was added: A.P. Biology, led by the jovial Mr. Bruce Renee. And an Astronomy class was introduced in 1980/81, taught by Earth Science instructor Mr. Tom Maguire. (...) The school, physically, was somewhat backward and un-updated, as there was no auditorium for example, and the lone computer room was quite small. Yet it was reasonably standard for a small NYC suburban school district at the time. Nonetheless there was a sense that BHS was maturing, intellectually, as there was growing academic rigor and excitement present. Additionally, an intelligent, young mathematics and computer instructor had been recently introduced: one Mr. Raihl. My brother and I would ironically joke that we were "relaxing with Raihl" when taking one of his classes (from an SCTV scit): in actuality, it proved quite different as he placed you to work. He was very informed, and his PreCalculus classes would feature large sections devoted to advanced Math.

If someone could supply me with the correct spelling of all these good teachers, I would be pleased to introduce a segment about this era into the main article. It did seem, then, that the emphasis was straight science, but this should not be surprising! These few years witnessed the developing Space Shuttle program, the Mt. St. Helens explosion in Washington, the Voyager spacecraft visits to Jupiter and Saturn, Dr. Carl Sagan and his "Cosmos" science documentary, PBS's continuing "NOVA" telecasts, and America's growing fascination with the computer. The Chemistry instructor at the time was Mr. Starr.

All in the math and science programs were very solid instructors. The whole school was like this, but it was the variety and interest in science at the time, and developing courses, that made this era unusual and notable. Seniors would often take science electives to pad their applications to College, but some Juniors also attended. (John G. Lewis (talk) 16:14, 2 June 2016 (UTC))

I'll try to place something up this winter, re what BHS was like 40 years ago. I was the class of 1982. (John G. Lewis (talk) 06:41, 7 October 2018 (UTC))


 * It would need to have reliable sources, not your own recollections. Yetishawl (talk) 16:25, 7 October 2018

(UTC)


 * Fine... But I am a source for this topic. What do you expect me to do, quite...?  I wrote more colorfully than I would otherwise, above, yet if you do not want an addition by me here, very well.  Btw. there was a second biology teacher at the school then who was a favorite with students: one Mr. Chervin.  I actually had him for 10th grade biology.  A very nice and humble man, and his classes truly were 'relaxing.'  Mr. Bruce Renee was hired circa 1980, and generally handled the more advanced classes in Biology.  Mr. Star was the Chemistry teacher, and his classes were very solid.  To reiterate, all science teachers at Briarcliff H.S. at the time were excellent.  (John G. Lewis (talk) 17:28, 20 February 2019 (UTC))

Enrollment
Everything looks good, just need to update for current stats, if available.

Theater
The last paragraph seems like it is two different subjects. It starts out mentioning awards, then moves into extent and methods of production. Can these be split and expanded?

Sports
Can we get more information? I notice there is a large block of hidden text... Also, the chart is very cramped, but I imagine that will be fixed once that text is made visible.

Under basketball, it mentions Lombardi. Is this bit necessary, since there is no context?

Final Thoughts
Overall, wonderful article. I think there are a few things to look at before FA, but certainly nothing insurmountable. If you have any questions, or would like any help now that the copy edit is complete, please let me know! -Pax85 (talk) 01:24, 16 June 2015 (UTC)

External links modified
Hello fellow Wikipedians,

I have just added archive links to 1 one external link on Briarcliff High School. Please take a moment to review my edit. You may add after the link to keep me from modifying it, if I keep adding bad data, but formatting bugs should be reported instead. Alternatively, you can add to keep me off the page altogether, but should be used as a last resort. I made the following changes:
 * Attempted to fix sourcing for http://www.usnews.com/education/best-high-schools/new-york/districts/briarcliff-manor-union-free-school-district/briarcliff-high-school-13535

When you have finished reviewing my changes, please set the checked parameter below to true or failed to let others know (documentation at ).

Cheers.—cyberbot II  Talk to my owner :Online 11:56, 30 March 2016 (UTC)

External links modified
Hello fellow Wikipedians,

I have just modified one external link on Briarcliff High School. Please take a moment to review my edit. If you have any questions, or need the bot to ignore the links, or the page altogether, please visit this simple FaQ for additional information. I made the following changes:
 * Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20131215181054/http://www.pnwboces.org/CELandHR/PDF/2012-13CEL_PreviewProgramOfferings.pdf to http://www.pnwboces.org/CELandHR/PDF/2012-13CEL_PreviewProgramOfferings.pdf

When you have finished reviewing my changes, you may follow the instructions on the template below to fix any issues with the URLs.

Cheers.— InternetArchiveBot  (Report bug) 16:09, 25 July 2017 (UTC)