Talk:Champagne Problems (Taylor Swift song)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: TechnoSquirrel69 (talk · contribs) 00:00, 1 March 2024 (UTC)

I'm happy to take this one! Expect a review in the next few days. —TechnoSquirrel69 (sigh) 00:00, 1 March 2024 (UTC)

Alright, here comes the review! Please respond with ✅, ❌, or something similar to that effect, without crossing any of my comments out. You can also pose any general questions you have in below.

Lead

 * I have reservations on the use of technical terms here; see my comment below.
 * The statement about the Eras tour is not reflected anywhere in the body of the article. I would move the statement along with its citation further down.
 * The statement that the song was recorded at Kitty Committee is unsourced.
 * ✅ all three.  ℛonherry  ☘  12:08, 5 March 2024 (UTC)

Background and release

 * "Taylor Swift" is an excessive link.
 * Comment: It is the first mention of Swift within the article body. It should be hyperlinked, should it not?  ℛonherry  ☘  12:15, 5 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Considering this is the creator of the song, whose name is right there in the title of the article, I would say no. However, you're free to disagree with me on this point, and I won't push it if you'd like to keep the link. —TS


 * The sentence beginning "In September 2020," feels pretty original research-y to me given that it's cited to the primary source on Disney+. Where is the subjective phrasing of "assembled" and "secluded" coming from? Also,
 * I've added source for that.  ℛonherry  ☘  12:15, 5 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Thanks, this looks good to me. —TS


 * Why is this discussion of a documentary about Swift's previous album in this article? Is it directly relevant to the subject in any way?
 * The song is part of the album that was recorded the same evening as the documentary.  ℛonherry  ☘  12:15, 5 March 2024 (UTC)


 * Decider is run by the New York Post, which is designated as a generally unreliable source. This needs to be removed or replaced.
 * This has yet to be addressed. —TS
 * ✅ —TS
 * The quote beginning "I say it was a surprise..." is far too long to be encyclopedic. Same goes for the quote of the lyrics further down. These two should be paraphrased, shortened, or removed — and I'd highly recommend removing the lyrics. In general, I'd be wary of relying too much on the artist's opinions of their work that they share in interviews, as it tips the scales of undue weight a little too much in that direction.
 * ✅. Don't know who added it. The last time I read this article and decided to nominate it for GA, this prose was not there.  ℛonherry  ☘  12:17, 5 March 2024 (UTC)
 * ✅. Don't know who added it. The last time I read this article and decided to nominate it for GA, this prose was not there.  ℛonherry  ☘  12:17, 5 March 2024 (UTC)


 * This whole second paragraph feels a bit out of place in a section titled "Background and release". I'd recommend shortening it significantly and merging it down into.
 * What makes Justrandomthings a reliable source? It appears to be a blog, which is considered generally unreliable due to being self-published.
 * I have the same reservations as before about using an extended quote from Swift to describe the song ("two longtime college sweethearts..."). I have additional reservations about citing a tweet from Swift in this context.
 * "Champagne" is an excessive link.
 * ✅ all of the above, except those I've commented on.  ℛonherry  ☘  12:29, 5 March 2024 (UTC)

Composition and lyrics

 * The subjective descriptors "weepy" and "spacious" should not be written in Wikipedia's voice, and need inline attribution to the writers of those articles. ("[Reviewer] felt that the song was '[descriptor], or something to that effect.) Rinse and repeat for the rest of this section.
 * The second half of that sentence ("oompah piano chords that interlace...") is too closely paraphrased.
 * "Apologetic" is not verified by the source.
 * "Champagne Problems" also sees the narrator addressing → The narrator addresses
 * There are two relatively bare lyric quotes cited to Elle. Rather than including entire lines of the song here, it would be more informative to write about what the reviewers said about them, or how they were interpreted.
 * What makes MusicNotes a reliable source? More broadly, how is the inclusion of the tempo and vocal range encyclopedic?
 * ✅ all.  ℛonherry  ☘  12:40, 5 March 2024 (UTC)
 * What makes MusicNotes a reliable source? More broadly, how is the inclusion of the tempo and vocal range encyclopedic?
 * ✅ all.  ℛonherry  ☘  12:40, 5 March 2024 (UTC)

Critical reception

 * This section mostly reads like a series of "[A] said [B]" statements that don't connect to each other in a logical manner. Just like in any other section of the article, related information should be organized together in series, and the reviewers' opinions can still be shared without using excessive quotations. I'd highly recommend reading this essay, which is a useful list of mistakes to avoid in reception sections. This is going to require a substantial rewrite, so I'll withhold some of my other comments about this section until later so as not to waste your time.
 * Remove the peacock term " hit".
 * The second half of that sentence ("with the latter being..." reads quite awkwardly, could you rephrase it?
 * "Billboard " and "bridge" are duplicate links.
 * ✅ all.  ℛonherry  ☘  13:13, 5 March 2024 (UTC)

Miscellaneous

 * The entirety of is missing inline citations. Thankfully, most of the references can just be copied from, though.
 * File:DomPerignonChampagne.jpg is licensed under CC BY 2.0, no issues. See my comment above about the appropriateness of its usage.
 * ✅ both.  ℛonherry  ☘  13:13, 5 March 2024 (UTC)

Discussion
Thanks for your patience, Ronherry! I have various concerns about this article as it pertains to the criteria which will require a fairly involved series of changes and improvements. However, I feel like these issues are workable, and if you're willing to put slightly more effort into this review than you might normally expect from a GAN review, I'm willing to work with you to get this article to GA level instead of just failing this nomination outright. Let me know if you have any questions! —TechnoSquirrel69 (sigh) 06:37, 4 March 2024 (UTC)


 * Pinging you to let you know I've responded to your comments!  ℛonherry  ☘  13:14, 5 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Hey Ronherry; sorry to keep you waiting, but I've been a little busy this week. I may have more time to do a second round of this review over the weekend. I appreciate you for getting back to me so quickly! —TechnoSquirrel69 (sigh) 05:14, 7 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Thanks once again for your patience with me, Ronherry; it's been a bit of a crazy week! Nice work on this so far, and here are some follow-up comments to your changes, some of which I've left inline above.
 * In the lead, "portrayal... of mental health" is not supported by any claims in the body.
 * The list of countries where the song charted seems too detailed for the lead. Just mentioning that it charted in multiple countries should suffice.
 * In, use of the term "lauded" is not neutral; the source doesn't go much further than a short description of the song, so a word like "" would be more appropriate.
 * The first paragraph of is still unsourced.
 * I'm not convinced needs bullet points per MOS:PARA.
 * —TechnoSquirrel69 (sigh) 18:34, 11 March 2024 (UTC)
 * ✅ all.  ℛonherry  ☘  08:41, 13 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Thanks! I've responded to some of your questions inline above, you might want to take a look at that. I also added some new comments in . —TechnoSquirrel69 (sigh) 14:49, 13 March 2024 (UTC)
 * I've addressed those new comments as well, thank you.  ℛonherry  ☘  09:33, 16 March 2024 (UTC)
 * @Ronherry: I'm still seeing some pending issues, such as the The Long Pond Studio Sessions relation to the song, and all of the reference formatting issues I brought up in . Could you take closer look at those and get back to me? —TechnoSquirrel69 (sigh) 15:19, 16 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Done, both the sessions' relation to the song, and the references' formatting, except the one thing where I requested some aid from you. Thanks.  ℛonherry  ☘  18:22, 23 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Really nice work on this nomination over the past few weeks, Ronherry! I appreciate your patience with the delays and your perseverance to get through some of the more involved changes. From a nomination I was initially unsure of, you've really tightened everything up, and I'm pleased to this as a good article. Congratulations! Don't forget that you have seven-day window to nominate the article at Did you know? to have a hook appear on the Main Page! —TechnoSquirrel69 (sigh) 19:54, 23 March 2024 (UTC)