Talk:Chen-Lu Tsou/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: ImmortalWizard (talk · contribs) 16:14, 9 January 2019 (UTC)

Phew, after over half a year this will reviewed. I will use the next couple of days to thoroughly go through the process following WP:GAC. I might need more time than usual since it contains sources from another language and also because I am no expert in biology. Disclaimer: I am a 2019 WikiCup participant. I assume good faith and might trust the nominator and other editors regarding the reliability of the sources. If needed, I might question the sources and it would '''highly appreciated if the the nominator can verify/proof unaccessible and foreign language references.  Immortal  Wizard  (chat) 16:14, 9 January 2019 (UTC)

Lead

 * Provide wikilink to biochemist. All the related biographies I visited has it. Unfortunately, it seems like this occupation is not well known apparently, although I might be wrong.
 * Linked. -Zanhe (talk) 19:53, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * Why is his name spelled/pronounced in English? Ok, the reason might be quite obvious.But at least a source which clarifies this will be very useful. Which leads me to question, why is his original chinese name spelled in english in the first place?
 * "Zou Chenglu" is the standard pinyin spelling of his name and is widely used in Chinese sources. However, he began publishing in the 1940s under the nonstandard romanization Chen-Lu Tsou, before pinyin was invented, and that's the name he was known for in the West. -Zanhe (talk) 19:53, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * It's never mentioned in the body about him being appointed as professor.
 * Added to the body. -Zanhe (talk) 19:53, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * Might be useful to make another paragraph regarding his behavior during cultural revolution and his action against "unhealthy practices", considering they are given weight in the body.
 * Added. -Zanhe (talk) 19:53, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "He was a professor of the Shanghai Institute of Biochemistry and later a professor and Deputy Director of the Institute of Biophysics, Chinese Academy of Sciences (CAS). Tsou was an academician of the CAS and The World Academy of Sciences (TWAS)." The second sentence could be reworded a little bit since it looks like almost a repetition of the first.
 * Edited. -Zanhe (talk) 19:53, 17 January 2019 (UTC)

Early life and education

 * "Tsou was born on 17 May 1923 in Qingdao, Shandong Province, with his ancestral home in Wuxi, Jiangsu." - I would have Qingdao, Shandong instead of them being separately wikilinked. The same goes with the other city (Wuxi) mentioned. Also, province should be all small letters. By the way, why is his ancestral home significant? Did he spend any time there? Any expansion from the source will the appreciated. It might be significant in Chinese culture (which is true in my culture as well), but here in English wikipedia an explanation will be very useful.
 * Delinked provinces. In Chinese culture, one's ancestral home is far more important than the birth place, and many Chinese sources and English translations simply say he was from Wuxi (as is the common practice in China). I'm mentioning both because I've seen situations where discrepancy in sources can cause confusion. -Zanhe (talk) 20:11, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * Wikilink Cambridge's Department of Metallurgy to the page Department of Materials Science and Metallurgy, University of Cambridge, if it is the right one.
 * Linked. -Zanhe (talk) 20:11, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * I think it's better to move everything about his wife from this, the lead and the career section to the family section. It is unnecessary and might be distracting for some readers at this point of the article.
 * Moved to "family" section. -Zanhe (talk) 20:11, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * Wikilink World War II
 * Linked. -Zanhe (talk) 20:11, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "during the World War II" sounds better than "before the end of World War II."
 * Changed. -Zanhe (talk) 20:11, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "After the war, Tsou won a government scholarship to..." probably received will be a better word choice than won.
 * Changed to "was awarded". The government scholarships were highly competitive, and I feel "received" does not reflect that. -Zanhe (talk) 20:11, 17 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "He was at first bound for the University of Birmingham, but on the recommendation of Wang Yinglai, he was accepted by the University of Cambridge to study under David Keilin, who had been Wang's doctoral advisor, at the Molteno Institute for Research in Parasitology." - rephrase needed. Also I would recommend cutting the sentence in half.
 * Shortened and revised. -Zanhe (talk) 20:11, 17 January 2019 (UTC)

Career

 * "Tsou's doctoral thesis was properties of the haemprotein cytochrome c;" - shouldn't it be "was based on the properties", since the source never mention the title?
 * Edited. -Zanhe (talk) 19:17, 18 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "Tsou's doctoral thesis was properties of the haemprotein cytochrome c; his research is considered a first step towards the eventual discovery of protein's structure." - Along with my previous comment, it would be beneficial for the readers, both experts and casuals to have an explanation on why is it considered important. This has to do with WP:NPOV. A number of options are open here: a)explain his research a little bit from the source, b)simply cite the author and journal in text like "According to...", or c)really explain thoroughly what he did and why the research is widely acclaimed. For the last option, you might need additional sources where it states that for an ideal FA.
 * Added "according to Edward Slater. -Zanhe (talk) 19:17, 18 January 2019 (UTC)


 * wikilinking chemical modification will be useful for readers
 * Linked. -Zanhe (talk) 19:17, 18 January 2019 (UTC)


 * Academician needs wikilink
 * Linked. -Zanhe (talk) 19:17, 18 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "It was in the midst of the Cultural Revolution, when scientific activity was frozen in the anti-intellectual political atmosphere." - is it related to the previous statement? Make sure to connect it properly to justify it's existence. Also, please have look if it's supported by the source.
 * The Cultural Revolution was a traumatic period for science and culture in China, when all research ground to a halt and many intellectuals were persecuted. It's important to mention the period to account for the hiatus of research in his prime. -Zanhe (talk) 05:25, 20 January 2019 (UTC)


 * wikilink if "National Natural Science Prize" is related to "State Science and Technology Prizes"
 * Linked. -Zanhe (talk) 19:17, 18 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "When American biochemist Emil L. Smith, a fellow alumnus of the Molteno Institute, visited Tsou following Richard Nixon's 1972 visit to China, Tsou used reagent bottles filled with water to maintain a pretense of scientific research" - why is it so relevant? explanation required
 * See my comment above about the Cultural Revolution. He was so ashamed of not being able to do research that he tried to pretend doing it. This is given substantial coverage in his obituary by Slater. -Zanhe (talk) 05:25, 20 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "He won the National Natural Science Prize First Class three times and Second Class three times." nice way to conclude but I would add something like "By the end of his career"
 * Added. -Zanhe (talk) 19:17, 18 January 2019 (UTC)

Campaign against "unhealthy practices" in science

 * The subheading is too big and I would replace this with something like "Non-scientific legacy" or "Active work on academics"
 * Shortened to "activism". -Zanhe (talk) 05:29, 20 January 2019 (UTC)


 * Also I personally think it would be better to have as a sub section under career, or entirely under career without subheading.
 * Changed to subsection. -Zanhe (talk) 05:29, 20 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "pseudoscience" might require wikilink
 * Linked, pseudoscience and academic fraud. -Zanhe (talk) 05:29, 20 January 2019 (UTC)


 * cell formation might require wikilink
 * Linked. -Zanhe (talk) 05:29, 20 January 2019 (UTC)

Family

 * Looks fine, although I would like this to be merged with death as one.
 * Merged into "Personal life" section. -Zanhe (talk) 05:32, 20 January 2019 (UTC)

Death

 * Change "Tsou suffered from cancer in old age, but continued working until the last day of his life. He died in Beijing on 23 November 2006, at the age of 83." to "Despite suffering from cancer, Tsou continued to do his work until his death. He died in Beijing on 23 November 2006, at the age of 83.", to avoid bias and have as neutral language as possible.
 * Changed. -Zanhe (talk) 05:32, 20 January 2019 (UTC)

Final comments and results
Uh, I'm finally done reviewing! Had a lot of fun and learnt a lot. I'll keep this on hold for 7 days. I am willing to give extra time if the nominator wishes. In the meantime, I will be awaiting and might review again if significant changes are made. Thanks!  Immortal  Wizard  (chat) 19:30, 9 January 2019 (UTC)
 * 7 days have passed, do you want more time?  Immortal  Wizard  (chat) 19:14, 16 January 2019 (UTC)
 * Sorry for not responding sooner. I just returned from my winter break a couple days ago, with lots of backlogged tasks to take care of. I was planning to start working on this today, and will probably need a day or two to finish. Thanks for your patience. -Zanhe (talk) 19:43, 16 January 2019 (UTC)
 * ok I'll come back in a few days.  Immortal  Wizard  (chat) 19:50, 16 January 2019 (UTC)
 * Thanks for your thorough review and for your patience. I've finally finished revising the article according to your suggestions, and have written my responses directly under your comments. Please check them out. -Zanhe (talk) 05:52, 20 January 2019 (UTC)
 * Looks good to me. Passing this.  Immortal  Wizard  (chat) 16:55, 21 January 2019 (UTC)