Talk:Christian Brothers High School (Sacramento, California)

Assess
This is a start on this school article. Further advice is available at the school project page.
 * 1) Add some topics (like history, notable alumni, etc)
 * 2) Keep adding references
 * 3) Add pictures
 * 4) Ask for an assessment at the schools project.EagleFan (talk) 21:47, 8 August 2009 (UTC)
 * Well done on, intentionally or not, helping to clear the list at WP:WPSCH/AR. Camaron · Christopher · talk 09:56, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

NPOV section athletics
I added this template warning because this newly added section does not provide a neutral point of view.

Current revision: "Christian Brothers High School is a member of the CIF Sac-Joaquin Section and participates in the Sierra Valley Conference. Through participation in athletics, student athletes will have the opportunity to develop physically, emotionally, socially, and spiritually. They will recognize the presence of God in oneself and others during competition. Student-athletes, coaches, and parents are called upon to work together in a true spirit of sportsmanship."

Suggested revision: "Christian Brothers High School is a member of the CIF Sac-Joaquin Section and participates in the Sierra Valley Conference."

Thank you. - Stillwaterising (talk) 01:29, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
 * Concur. It appears that some alums or current students are at work. --Morenooso (talk) 04:12, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

Further issues of neutrality
Parts of this article do not provide a neutral point of view, and, occasionally, liken to something of an advertisement. A few examples:


 * The 24-acre campus is characterized by openness and beauty.
 * The CBHS graduate is intellectually competent, well-rounded, empathetic, introspective, and caring.
 * At Christian Brothers, there are constant opportunities to display your artwork, including the La Salle Art Exhibit, the High School Self-Portrait Show at the 20th Street Art Gallery in downtown Sacramento and the Empty Bowls Luncheon, among others.
 * KBFT has brought and will continue to bring high quality scholastic broadcasting to the Christian Brothers Community.

Further, emphasis on competitive accomplishments of various school-affiliated groups are unnecessary, and only add to problem of neutrality:


 * In 2009 the Christian Brothers boys rugby team ranked #2 in the nation.
 * The CB girls volleyball team ranked #1 in Northern California and #2 in the state. —Preceding unsigned comment added by 98.238.238.91 (talk) 06:54, 20 July 2010 (UTC)


 * A shorter more encyclopaedic article is better than one long advert. I did a copyright violation check and couldn't find anything, however a lot of the article needed a full re-write to be encyclopaedic and some of it was so full of jargon that a general audience would never understand it anyway. I have removed the most offending sections. CT Cooper · &#32;talk 09:44, 20 July 2010 (UTC)