Talk:Christmas Queens 2/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 17:29, 16 December 2020 (UTC)

We had discussed the prospect of me potentially reviewing one of your articles this winter in the past; I will now do it! --K. Peake 17:29, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Thank you! --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 18:33, 16 December 2020 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

 * Recording date is not sourced anywhere in the body
 * I don't even remember adding 2016 to the infobox. I have no idea when the album was recorded so --- Another Believer  ( Talk ) 21:50, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Target holiday to Holiday music
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 21:57, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "by various artists, released by" → "by various artists. It was released by" since the opening para is currently too short at only two sentences
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 21:57, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "The 30-track album is a sequel" → "Consisting of 30 tracks, the album is a sequel"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 21:57, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Add release year of Christmas Queens in brackets
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 21:57, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "contestants as well as" → "contestants alongside"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 21:57, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "for "Working Holiday" featuring" → "for "Working Holiday", which features"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 21:57, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "and Manila Luzon, a web series called" → "and Manila Luzon. A web series was released for it, titled"
 * But doing this makes the second sentence grammatically incorrect. See below comment. --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 22:04, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * That is reasonable, but still change "called" to "titled" in the above manner though. --K. Peake 09:25, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:27, 17 December 2020 (UTC)


 * "and a tour with December shows" → "and a tour by various artists with December 2016 shows"
 * I implemented your preferred wording here but kept a single sentence instead of splitting into 2, in order to keep the text grammatically correct. Does this work for you? --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 21:57, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Why are the countries not ordered alphabetically?
 * They are ordered chronologically. --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 21:57, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * You should add a sentence after this one about the album's critical reception, writing: "Christmas Queens 2 received..."
 * I just added "received a mixed critical reception" ahead and the chart placement claim because there aren't really overarching opinions, I would say. Critics more or less said things they liked and didn't like about individual performers, more than provide commentary on the album as a whole. Would you agree? --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 22:04, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Yes, it is fine to not give an overview when it is extremely hard to. --K. Peake 17:00, 17 December 2020 (UTC)


 * "Christmas Queens 2 reached a peak position of number two" → "It peaked at number two"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 21:57, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
 * You still need to change to "peaked at" to be less wordy. --K. Peake 09:25, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:27, 17 December 2020 (UTC)

Composition

 * "The 30-track compilation features" → "Christmas Queens 2 is a 30-track compilation album that features"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "performing collectively as the" → "who perform collectively as the"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "material[2] "tailored to" → "material,[2] "tailored to"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Wikilink traditional folk per MOS:LINK2SECT
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Bossa Nova should not have the target on when it is part of the song title
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Add "on Christmas Queens 2." at the end of the sentence paid reference to above since it is the start of a new para
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "precedes Sharon Needles's" → "precedes Sharon Needles'"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Wikilink disco
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * ""O Holy Night" (featuring Thorgy Thor on violin) is followed by Ivy Winters on" → ""O Holy Night", which features featuring Thorgy Thor on violin, is followed by Ivy Winters performing"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "runs approximately one hour long" → "runs for approximately one hour"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)

Release and promotion

 * "The album was released by" → "Christmas Queens 2 was released by"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:52, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Add the appropriate citation(s) at the end of the second sentence
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:52, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "debuted on Billboard on November 25." → "debuted through Billboard on November 25, 2016."
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:52, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Target Santa to Santa Claus
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:52, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "Glenn Garner said," → "Glenn Garner said of the video," to be specific
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:52, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Wikilink hoarse voice
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:52, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "The web series Christmas Queens was announced in early November;" → "A web series for Christmas Queens 2 entitled Christmas Queens was announced in early November 2016;"
 * Done, except I left out "for Christmas Queens 2" because I'm not certain the series is specific to this album. --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:52, 17 December 2020 (UTC)

Tour and live performances

 * "performed in a" → "performed on the album's"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "from December 3–8." → "from December 3–8, 2016." or something similar if this reads awkwardly
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "Shows were later" → "Shows for the tour were later"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "who also described" → "who also analyzed"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Mention the release year of "All I Want for Christmas Is You"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Target skivvies to Undergarment
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "and assless chaps he called" → "and assless chaps which he called"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "(described as" → "that was described as"
 * I think the parenthetical is better here, otherwise the sentences becomes a bit of a run-on and hard to follow. --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "smokes pot") as well as" → "smokes pot" as well as"
 * I think the parenthetical is better here, otherwise the sentences becomes a bit of a run-on and hard to follow. --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "He wrote," → "He wrote that"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Wikilink kitschy
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Target minimal to Minimal music
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "from both Christmas Queens albums in" → "from the first two Christmas Queens albums for" since you have mentioned all three of them earlier in this section
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "November and December 2016." → "November and December of 2016."
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Should "A Royal Holiday" really have speech marks around it?
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:06, 17 December 2020 (UTC)

Reception and chart history

 * Retitle to Reception, as that can refer to both critical and commercial reception comfortably
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "Joe Lynch of Billboard wrote," → "Lynch wrote of Christmas Queens 2,"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "which he said was" → "which he said is"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Target synth to Synthesizer
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "Sean Maunier of Metro Weekly called the compilation" → "Maunier called the compilation"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * The img of Thorgy Thor should be at the top of this section because it will be closer to the tour with that positioning
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Wikilink ode
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "with some songs that" → "noting that some songs"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "some of the interludes" → "a number of the interludes" to avoid repetitive wording
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "He thought that Jackie Beat" → "He thought Jackie Beat"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Target dance to Dance music
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "funny attitude". He then summarized" → "funny attitude", before summarizing"
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * "matching the performance of the original Christmas Queens." → "matching the debut and peak of its prequel."
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)

Track listing

 * Use hlist to separate artists when there are multiple ones for a song, rather than commas
 * Why? WikiProject_Albums/Album_article_style_advice doesn't suggest this... --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:40, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Oh, my bad; I was just used to seeing things the way I suggested but you needn't change the track listing then. --K. Peake 17:00, 17 December 2020 (UTC)

Charts

 * See MOS:TABLECAPTION
 * I'm not sure what's needed here. I'm looking at the GAs on your profile page and I'm not seeing a difference. --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:14, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * You should add a caption saying "Chart performance for Christmas Queens 2. --K. Peake 17:00, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * , ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 17:36, 17 December 2020 (UTC)


 * US Comedy Albums → US Comedy Albums (Billboard)
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:38, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * The ref should be next to the chart's name rather than having its own column
 * ✅ --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 15:38, 17 December 2020 (UTC)

Final comments and verdict

 * until you have fixed the issues, but I definitely have faith in you to do so. Was great to review one of your articles for the first time since the summer; one thing I did notice was how great the addition of images was throughout! --K. Peake 09:25, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * , Thanks for reviewing. Done with Round 1 of addressing your concerns. --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 16:33, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * Very timely response, but I replied where things still need covering! --K. Peake 17:00, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * , Have another look? --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 17:44, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * ✅ now after I took another look and did some minor copy editing to add some moderate finishing touches, congrats on this GA and I heavily applaud not just your response time but how you address the comments in such a constructive manner! --K. Peake 18:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
 * , Thanks so much! --- Another Believer ( Talk ) 18:47, 17 December 2020 (UTC)