Talk:Circle of Poison

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Stacy Alabre. Peer reviewers: Speed.z, Csirabella.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 19:05, 17 January 2022 (UTC)

Removed section
Just noting here (and pinging so they can see it). I've removed the section on American Exports of Powerful Pesticides, as it had a number of problems with tone and scope. It was unclear to me how the paragraphs were related to the section title, as the first and the second moved from export to import. The third was largely about global sales of pesticides of which many must be american but it may be something better covered in the article on the green revolution or pesticide resistance. I was also concerned about the tone of certain sentences--notably those which suggested to the reader that a Faustian bargain is in the works. Remember that a reader comes to the encyclopedia for a general reference, not to be convinced one way or another on a particular topic. The remainder of the article has some issues with tone as well.

I think the rest of the article could be improved a bit by changing one detail: the article as written assumed an American reader--the term itself is largely specific to the US (mainly discussed by american writers WRT american laws etc.) so the article itself doesn't need to cover other countries but try writing it as though you were writing about a term which is used in the political discussion in a different country. It's not easy, but it's a good exercise. Adam (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:35, 19 February 2016 (UTC)

Review
Looking good! I did some copyediting and left a few templates. Next steps could include and making sure it's not a Wikipedia:Orphan. -Reagle (talk) 20:38, 25 February 2016 (UTC)

Citation needed
This is such a great topic, and I really appreciate all the research you've done! You'll notice I left a citation needed tag on the 2nd to last sentence. I think that the last sentence -- "Chemical manufacturers report annually to the EPA which compounds have been exported, and the quantities exported, but this report does not tell where particular compounds are shipped" -- perhaps explains that the shipping data is hard to obtain. If so, I think you should draw that line more clearly. Also, the EPA report sentence only notes that the shipping data is missing, where the preceding sentence states "It is difficult to obtain accurate, current information regarding which compounds are being sold and where they are being shipped". Where is the proof that it is difficult to obtain accurate, current information on which compounds are being sold? If one of your sources says that it is in fact difficult to obtain this data, you should definitely include that as a citation. AmandaRR123 (talk) 16:14, 29 February 2016 (UTC)

Peer Review
Hey Stacy,

As Amanda said, this is a really great topic. I'm frankly very surprised that there wasn't a Wikipedia article already about the subject. This is a very dense subject, which probably made it very difficult to summarize concisely. As a result, there were several sentences that were difficult to understand, especially for somebody who doesn't know much about the subject. I did my best to rework some of these parts throughout the article. However, there were some I couldn't do much for because I didn't know enough about the subject (eg. Permit government to refuse the import of certain hazardous pesticides, including restricted-use pesticides and those which are conditionally registered or are the subject of cancellation proceedings.[needs copy edit]). I found it confusing that the circle of poison prevention act would permit the government to reuse hazardous pesticides. Perhaps that is the case and it is just shocking to me. But, I wasn't sure if the wording of the sentence was causing me to misunderstand what you were trying to say. Aside from that, there were a lot of terms that you brought up in your article that I'm guessing the average person wouldn't understand. You could go back and briefly explain these, but I just inserted Wiki links to other pages. This hopefully will eliminate any confusion to your readers and also ensure that your article is not an orphan. That's all I've got. Great job and keep up the good work!! Zach Speed (talk) 21:13, 3 March 2016 (UTC)

Before Leahy
It probably should be mentioned that a first attempt to stop the export of banned chamicals was undertaken by the carter administration, ending up with an executive order by Carter that was later rescinded by Reagan.See for instance:
 * https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/lifestyle/1981/10/05/those-pestilent-pesticides/80fabc19-307d-481b-8a70-b37cddad78ed/

--Kmhkmh (talk) 06:31, 20 October 2019 (UTC)