Talk:Cleo Damianakes/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Bruxton (talk · contribs) 21:56, 5 March 2024 (UTC)


 * So good to find you here! I look forward to reviewing the work of one of our best editors. I work fast and will likely complete this review in a day or two. If you do not check back after I have completed I will likely ping you. In some cases I will make suggestions and many of them may be my own preference and in that case you can choose to implement or not. Bruxton (talk) 21:56, 5 March 2024 (UTC)
 * I have completed a first thorough check . Lovely article about an important illustrator. I look forward to hearing what you think about the suggestions for improvement. Bruxton (talk) 01:15, 6 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Thanks . Pinging so he is aware. (Sorry it has been just over a year since we discussed submitting for GA.) Will take a look at the comments later tonight. Cielquiparle (talk) 09:57, 6 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Thank you. I will be ltraveling tomorrow so if we have a delay I will not get back to the nomination until the 18th.

Lead

 * I see where the expansion began
 * ❌ The elements of the lead are represented and cited in the body. One of my pet peeves is citations in the lead WP:LEADCITE. Would you see if you can remove the citations from the lead?
 * Partially implemented. Removed all the citations in the first paragraph, as those are cited in the body. Kept all the citations in second paragraph for now, as those claims are not repeated in the body of the article (except for the award). We could expand the article just to avoid this, but we would lose some economy of text. Cielquiparle (talk) 05:47, 7 March 2024 (UTC)
 * See if you can move the rest as there are still four citations in the lead and we should have the information in the body. 1b on the GA review chart I am using: It complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections MOS:LEAD.  Bruxton (talk) 13:49, 7 March 2024 (UTC)
 * Per MOS:LEAD: Because the lead usually repeats information that is in the body, editors should balance the desire to avoid redundant citations in the lead with the desire to aid readers in locating sources for challengeable material. Although the presence of citations in the lead is neither required in every article nor prohibited in any article, there is no exception to citation requirements specific to leads. The necessity for citations in a lead should be determined on a case-by-case basis by editorial consensus. Complex, current, or controversial subjects may require many citations; others, few or none.. But if you really dislike it I can look at reworking the article. Just probably can't get to it until the morning, Could we have an extension until March 18 when you are back? Cielquiparle (talk) 21:26, 7 March 2024 (UTC)
 * On second thought, will discuss with @Edwardx over the weekend and go from there. Cielquiparle (talk) 04:41, 8 March 2024 (UTC)
 * I do not think it is a best practice to put citations in the lead summary but after a week of waiting it seems like something that you are not willing to change. It is a good article in all other respects and citing the lead is not prohibited so I will get over it. Bruxton (talk) 02:13, 14 March 2024 (UTC)

Grammar
"permanent collections of National Gallery of Art" consider adding a determiner like "the" before National
 * Good spot, thanks for flagging.

"Damianakes,[9][10] was founder" again consider a determiner before founder
 * Changed. Interestingly both sources cited omit the article "the" before the noun "founder" but we can add it. There is nothing in the first source that suggests that there were any other founders.

"panels in lieu of writing a thesis" consider using "instead" in place of in lieu
 * It is simpler for sure.

"Frank G. Logan prize" should Prize" be capitalied?
 * Comment. The source doesn't and I would prefer not to. In fact, upon further research it seems it generally isn't capitalized. See Logan Medal of the Arts. Cielquiparle (talk) 06:23, 7 March 2024 (UTC)

"A Farewell to Arms earned her the reputation as creator of" consider "as a creator"
 * Changed.

"Other first edition dust jackets" in this use I think first-edition is hyphenated
 * Like hyphens.

"Cleo had four sisters, Alexandra, Marie, Stephanie, and Dorothy,[9] with whom she performed Greek dance,[12] and a brother named Solon."[11] consider a minor rewrite to "Cleo had four sisters, Alexandra, Marie, Stephanie, and Dorothy,[9] with whom she performed Greek dance.[12] She also had a brother named Solon."[11]
 * Changed. This had a knock-on effect on how the sentences in that section were grouped into paragraphs. Overall an improvement.

Covers for Hemingway Good use of notes, and the inflation template

Covers for Hemingway Good understanding of WP:LQ in the section

Covers for Hemingway I cannot access the source but did the source say "I never like the jacket" or was it "liked"?
 * Thank you. This is fixed!

Images

 * There are 8 images and 7 are PD. One image File:Hemingway farewell.png is a non-free but it has the correct summary and rationale.
 * The images are relevant and needed for the article. The captions are as succinct as they need to be

Chart
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