Talk:Cliff Thorburn/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 20:57, 3 January 2021 (UTC)

Will review Thorburn's article as thanks for reviewing the 2002 Masters. MWright96 (talk) 20:57, 3 January 2021 (UTC)
 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * Pass/Fail:

Lead

 * The Reference in the lead after Thorburn's birth date is not needed there but in the prose
 * "and winning the prestigious invitational Masters three times," - the word highlighted in bold is non-neutral
 * Maybe the third and fourth paragraphs can be merged into one
 * All addressed. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:02, 4 January 2021 (UTC)

Early life

 * Any more information about his parents?
 * I've added a little based on Black Ball Farce & Cue Ball Wizards and a Guardian article. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 01:04, 5 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "He left school at the age of 16," - what school did Thorburn go to?
 * Couldn't find this information in any of the sources. I thought it might be in one of the 1950's articles about his lacrosse career, but it wasn't as far as I could see. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 01:04, 5 January 2021 (UTC)


 * Wikilink snooker on the first instance only
 * Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 01:04, 5 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "He spend time with Fred Davis and Rex Williams when they toured Canada in 1970," - typo; should be spent
 * Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:06, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "he reportedly made a maximum break of 147 against Fred Hardwick." - in a tournament match, exhibition match or a practice game?
 * The Ottawa Journal doesn't say, but I found a little article about it in Billiards and Snooker magazine for September 1970 that makes it clear it wasn't in competition. Amended the text. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 01:04, 5 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "He won the North American championship in 1971, making six century breaks during the tournament, equalling the record for century breaks in a single tournament" - repetition of both the words "tournament" and "century breaks"
 * Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:06, 4 January 2021 (UTC)

Early professional career

 * "Thorburn played John Spencer in a series of three exhibition matches in 1971, and although he lost all three matches," - repetition of "matches"
 * "and on the day he arrives," - day of his arrival,
 * "losing the quarter-final 12–19 to Eddie Charlton, and, the following year, lost 14–15 to Higgins" - repetition of "losing/lost"
 * Wikilink session on the first instance to the relevant snooker-related article
 * "winning against Willie Thorne and Graham Miles to reach the final, where he won 8–6 against Taylor." - repetition of "win/winning"
 * "Thorburn reached the final of the 1978 1978 Masters" - duplicate mention of the year "1978"
 * All addressed. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:08, 4 January 2021 (UTC)

1980 world snooker champion

 * "then lost 3–5 to Griffiths in the Quarter-final." - the word in bold doesn't need to begin with a capital letter in this instance
 * Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:02, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * wikilink interval to the relevant article
 * I couldn't find an appropriate entry in Glossary of cue sports terms, or a suitable standalone article for this. Is there any target that you can suggest please? BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:02, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "with Higgins taking the following to the make it 11–11." - following two to level at 11–11.
 * Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:02, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "before Higgins squared the match at 15–15." - equalised at 15–15.
 * Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:02, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "and made a 51 break after than to win the title." - typo; should be that
 * Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:02, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "Thorburn is generally regarded as the first player from outside Britain to win the world championship, with Horace Lindrum's win in the match 1952 World Snooker Championship usually being disregarded." - repetition of "win"
 * Done. Also removed stray "match." BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:02, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * What's the reason given for Lindrum's 1952 world championship victory being disregarded?
 * I've added a footnote to attempt to address this. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 01:16, 5 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "Thorburn decided to move back to Canada." - return
 * Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:02, 4 January 2021 (UTC)

1983 world championship maximum break

 * Wikilink table to billiards table
 * "with Thorburn emerging as the winner,13–12." - needs to be a space between the comma and the number "13"
 * "on the day that he made his maximum break." - how about on the day of his maximum break.
 * All addressed. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:13, 4 January 2021 (UTC)

1984 to 1989

 * " where he met Thorne, with Thorne winning five frames in a row after the pair had been tied at 8–8." - repetition of "Thorne"
 * Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:16, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "to win 13–8." - think there are several words missing from this sentence
 * Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:16, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * Wikilink penalty points to the relevant article on the first instance only
 * Linked to "foul" in cuegloss. Let me know if there is a better target. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:16, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * Think the second and third paragraphs should be merged together
 * Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:16, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * "In 1988 Thorburn was fined £10,000 and two ranking points," - think there's a word missing to introduce the loss of two ranking points
 * Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:16, 4 January 2021 (UTC)


 * The fourth and fifth paragraphs I believe should be merged together
 * Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:16, 4 January 2021 (UTC)

Later years

 * "In 2010, Thorburn returned to the UK to compete on the Snooker Legends Tour where he faced Alex Higgins, Jimmy White and John Parrott." - sentence is lacking a reliable source to verify that it's correct
 * Reworded and added a source. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:31, 4 January 2021 (UTC)

Personal life

 * You can mention that he is an 1995 inductee of the BC Sports Hall of Fame with the appropriate reference
 * Added. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 00:06, 5 January 2021 (UTC)

Performance and rankings timeline

 * There needs to be some text above the table so that the reference is not a floating one
 * Removed floating ref. Refs pending for New Zealand Masters, Pot Black (most years), and 2 x Canadian Professional Championship. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:24, 4 January 2021 (UTC) Added refs for previously-unsourced results. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 23:00, 4 January 2021 (UTC)

Ranking finals: 10 (2 titles, 8 runners-up)

 * Same issue as the one in the above sub-section
 * Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:28, 4 January 2021 (UTC)