Talk:Crave (Madonna and Swae Lee song)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Kyle Peake (talk · contribs) 14:44, 10 June 2020 (UTC)

Been in the nominations list for a few weeks now, will review this one soon! --Kyle Peake (talk) 14:44, 10 June 2020 (UTC)

Infobox and lead
✅
 * Use bullet points instead of hlist in the infobox
 * Is how I left it OK? let me know--Christian (talk) 22:46, 13 June 2020 (UTC)
 * No, you should remove flatlist and just use bullet points since that is advised and definitely works. --Kyle Peake (talk) 07:10, 14 June 2020 (UTC)
 * Source for the recording date?
 * There aren't any verifiable sources as to the places/studios the album/songs were recorded or when
 * Remove the recording date then since it is WP:OR --Kyle Peake (talk) 06:40, 14 June 2020 (UTC)
 * like this?
 * That's fine, just need to fix the refs --Kyle Peake (talk) 09:57, 15 June 2020 (UTC)
 * Target hip hop to Hip hop music
 * Credit Madonna under Writer(s) as Madonna Ciccone and remove wiklink on her per WP:OVERLINK
 * Link to the video in here instead of External links
 * "Madonna featuring American rapper" → "Madonna, featuring American rapper"
 * "from her fourteenth studio album" → "from the former's fourteenth studio album"
 * "was released as the album's second official single" → "was released for digital download and streaming as the album's second [[Single (music)|single" with the targets as instructed, plus mention the labels this was through
 * ""Crave" was written by Madonna, Lee and Starrah," → "The song was written by the two artists and Starrah," plus this sentence should be the second of the lead instead of the single one, which should be third
 * "production was in charge of" → "production was handled by"
 * Target Mike Dean to Mike Dean (record producer)
 * "It has been noted as" → "The song has been noted as"
 * Target hip hop to Hip hop music
 * Target ballad to Sentimental ballad
 * "with lyrics that talk about desire" → "with the lyrics talking about desire"
 * "wrote for the album" → "wrote for Madame X
 * "but she put it on hold" → "but she put the work on hold"
 * Wiklink Lisbon
 * "she came to the conclusion" → "Madonna came to the conclusion"
 * "she needed a male voice on the track" → "a male voice was needed for inclusion"
 * "approached Lee to sing with her" → "approached Swae Lee to sing with her"
 * "It received generally positive reviews" → ""Crave" received generally positive reviews"
 * "there were some who found it forgettable" → "there were some who found the song forgettable"
 * "In the United States, "Crave" became" → "In the United States, it became"
 * Mention that the peak position was number 11 somewhere here
 * "on the official sales chart" → "on the UK Singles Sales chart" with the target
 * "A music video," → "An accompanying music video," with the wikilink
 * "Madonna and Lee singing the song" → "Madonna and Swae Lee singing the song"
 * Target New York to New York City
 * "A remix created by Tracy Young was performed on" → "A remix of the song was created by Tracy Young and performed during" with the wikilink removed

Background and composition
✅
 * "He has good energy"." → "He has good energy."" since this is from a bunch of full sentences so needs the punctuation inside per WP:QUOTEMARK
 * Remove wikilink on Lisbon, Portugal and solely wikilink Lisbon to itself
 * "seeking a top football academy" → "when seeking a top football academy"
 * Mention David's surname
 * "artists, painters and musicians, who" → "artists; painters and musicians, who"
 * "In these sessions, they" → "In the sessions, they"
 * "bring food, sit around the table and" → "bring food and sit around the table, and"
 * "had previously worked on her albums" → "had previously contributed to her albums"
 * "she wrote for the album, but she put it on hold" → "she wrote for Madame X, but had put it on hold"
 * "When she revisited all the songs" → "When Madonna revisited all the songs"
 * "she listened to "Crave" again" → "she listened to the track again"
 * "thought she needed a male voice on the track" → "thought a male voice was needed on it"
 * "and asked American singer and rapper Swae Lee to" → "and asked Swae Lee to" since you have already introduced him
 * "her, as she liked his voice" → "her due to liking his voice"
 * "Lee said he was very excited when Madonna approached him;" → "Of Madonna having approached him, Swae Lee said he was very excited,"
 * Target L.A. to Los Angeles
 * "it was cool"." → "it was cool."" since that's a sentence
 * "was written by Madonna, Lee and" → "was written by Madonna, Swae Lee and"
 * "was in charge of the singer, Mike Dean and" → "was in charge of the second of the three, Dean, and"
 * Target hip hop to Hip hop music
 * Target ballad to Sentimental ballad
 * "featuring acoustic guitar, and hand-clap" → "that features acoustic guitar and hand-clap"
 * "according to Madonna, is about" → "according to Madonna, the song is about"
 * [1][11] should both solely be at the end of the sentence since it's only two refs
 * "It presents influence from Lisbon's" → "It takes influence from Lisbon's" with the wikilink
 * "that the record was created" → "that the album was created"
 * "She "sighs and sings" → "Madonna "sighs and sings"
 * "until Lee joins her" → "until Swae Lee joins her"
 * Target chorus to Refrain
 * "with both singing" → "as both sing"
 * "noted that sonically, "Crave" was" → "noted that "Crave" is sonically"
 * Add [] around both (2012) and (1998), since neither of them are written out in the review

Critical reception
✅
 * "received generally positive reviews" → "was met with generally positive reviews"
 * "Also from Rolling Stone, Emily" → "Also from the magazine, Emily"
 * "referred to it as" → "referred to the song as"
 * "praising Lee's" → "praising Swae Lee's"
 * "called it a" → "called the song a"
 * This is too much quoting for NME review; maybe switch the "and yet sounds nothing like it" into your own words, ending the quote here
 * Target rhythmic to Rhythmic contemporary
 * "For Jeremy Helligar, from Variety, it" → "Jeremy Helligar from Variety stated it"
 * Slant Magazine quoting should be reduced and put in own words for bits
 * "Sean Maunier, from" → "Sean Maunier, for" to avoid repetitive wording
 * "and ethereal [...] sounds like it" → "and ethereal", saying that the song "sounds like it"
 * Change US Weekly to Us Weekly
 * "album track "Crazy", "have" → "fellow album track "Crazy" both "have"
 * "Writing for The Guardian, Ben Beaumont-Thomas" → "For The Guardian, Ben Beaumont-Thomas"
 * "opined it was one of the album's moments" → "opined that it was one of the moments on Madame X"
 * "deemed it "a misty ballad" → "deemed the song "a misty ballad"
 * Target drum programming to Programming (music)
 * Remove Medium as that violates WP:SELFPUB
 * "Jamie Tabberer was more critical;" → "Jamie Tabberer was more critical:"
 * "said it sounded like a" → "said the track sounded like a"
 * "dismissed it as "a naked attempt" → "dismissed the track as "a naked attempt"

Commercial performance
✅
 * "highest debut on the Billboards" → "highest debut on Billboards"
 * "number 19 on the week dated June 8, 2019" → "number 19, for the issue dated June 8, 2019"
 * "her second appearance for this decade" → "her 2nd appearance in the 2010s decade"
 * "The next week, the song climbed to" → "The next week, the song climbed four places to"
 * "It then climbed to its peak" → "The song then climbed to its peak"
 * "and her largest hit there since" → "and her largest hit on it since"
 * "also topped the" → "also topped the US"
 * "on the week dated November 16, 2019, becoming her" → "for the issue date of November 16, 2019, becoming Madonna's"
 * "on the official sales chart, spending only one week" → "on the UK Singles Sales chart and lasted for one week" with the target
 * "on the singles downloads chart" → "on the UK Download chart"
 * "on the week starting on" → "for the week starting on"
 * "staying inside the chart for one week" → "staying inside the Scottish Singles Chart for one week"
 * "On France's download chart, the song" → "On the French downloads chart, the song"
 * "it reached number 28 on its national chart" → "the song reached number 28 on the Single Top 40" with the target
 * "also peaked at number 19" → "further peaked at number 19"
 * "on the foreign language songs chart in China" → "on Billboard China's foreign language songs chart"

Music video and live performance

 * Img needs alt text
 * "music video. Madonna's hand reaches" → "music video, featuring Madonna's hand reaching" with the wikilink
 * Put a full-stop at the end of the main text
 * "while a rough unfinished cut" → "while a rough, unfinished cut"
 * [7][41] put in numerical order
 * Wikilink alter ego
 * "danger, I crave it"." → "danger, I crave it."" since that's sentences
 * "which eventually makes its way to Lee" → "with the pigeon eventually making its way to Swae Lee"
 * "The clip then shows the singer" → "The clip then shows Madonna"
 * "with footage of a shirtless Lee on a rooftop filled with pigeon coops" → "with footage of Swae Lee shirtless on a rooftop that is filled with pigeon coops"
 * [42][8] put in numerical order
 * "The final scene is of the two reunited in" → "The final scene shows the two of them reunited on"
 * "for each other's hand" → "for each other's hands"
 * "as two pigeons fly away" → "while two pigeons fly away"
 * "praised the video for being simpler" → "praised the music video for being simpler"
 * "for previous single" → "for Madonna's previous single"
 * "Billboard called the video" → "The staff of Billboard called the visual"
 * Target pigeon keepers to Pigeon keeping
 * "According to Idolator's Mike Wass, "the sleek" → "According to Wass, "the sleek"
 * "and said it was the singer's" → "and he said it was Madonna's"
 * "daughters Estere and Stella" → "daughters Estere and Stella Ciccone"
 * Wikilink on sequins
 * The last sentence is confusing; was there more than one performance of this song then?
 * Lee Joined Madonna for the performance of the song on that specific show
 * Oh this is fine, but you should mention the date at an earlier point. --Kyle Peake (talk) 16:39, 11 June 2020 (UTC)

✅

Track listing
✅
 * Change Stream to Digital download / streaming
 * Use the ref cited under May 10, 2019 instead of the Spotify one since that is unreliable and the former backs it up
 * Use a different ref for the MNEK Remix per ditto
 * Keep wikilink on Swae Lee but remove them from the artists listed under remixes since that's part of the title

Credits and personnel
✅
 * Wikilink Madonna
 * Target vocals to Singing
 * Target Mike Dean to Mike Dean (record producer)

Charts

 * Whole section is good

Release history

 * Format → Format(s)
 * Refs should have their own col and be centered
 * Remove second target on Digital download
 * Remove wiklink on Remix
 * Add the MNEK Remix here under an appropriately order placement
 * I don't get this last point, could you elaborate?
 * The MNEK remix had its separate release, so shouldn't it be included here too? --Kyle Peake (talk) 15:37, 13 June 2020 (UTC)
 * I think it's more appropriate to keep it under the Tracklist section, but let me know --Christian (talk) 22:44, 13 June 2020 (UTC)
 * Yeah you can do that since it's just one remix. --Kyle Peake (talk) 06:40, 14 June 2020 (UTC)

Final comments and verdict

 * but the changes shouldn't be too hard for you to fix. --Kyle Peake (talk) 09:15, 11 June 2020 (UTC)

I have corrected all the points, if I am missing one please let me know. --Christian (talk) 14:59, 15 June 2020 (UTC)
 * You have missed a few, which I have planked the not done template on. --Kyle Peake (talk) 15:18, 15 June 2020 (UTC)
 * will get to do them today, if not, tomorrow.--Christian (talk) 15:24, 15 June 2020 (UTC)
 * ✅! --Kyle Peake (talk) 18:46, 18 June 2020 (UTC)