Talk:Cyclone Gwenda

List of comments from FAC review

 * Suggest change to lead sentence. Severe Tropical Cyclone Gwenda was the most intense Australian tropical cyclone on record, with a barometric pressure of 900 hPa (mbar). Its extremely high initial energy also caused it to weaken quickly once it made landfall in Western Austrlia 18 hours after its winds peaked.  Then make a new paragraph, continue as it is.  This way you have a paragraph that summarizes the article, and two more paragraphs that go into slightly greater depth for the lead.


 * Severe Tropical Cyclone Gwenda originated from a weak tropical disturbance that formed on 1 April --shouldn't this be originated in?
 * No because it did originate from a weak tropical disturbance.Jason Rees (talk) 17:10, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
 * Gwenda began to undergo a period of explosive intensification.[1] Its forward motion significantly decreased as it turned due south before...began to undergo? how about "began explosive intensification" or just "intensified" as a pipe link to explosive intensification.  or how about Explosive intensification began ....

"Although classified as the strongest known Australian cyclone by the Bureau of Meteorology, the operational intensity of the storm was slightly lower."


 * Lower than what?


 * Already suffering from the effects of Cyclone Vance two weeks earlier, which had destroyed or severely damaged 40% of the homes in Exmout... Residents of Western Australia already suffered from the effects of Cyclone Vance, which had struck the region two weeks earlier. In such areas as Exmout, Vance had destroyed or severely damaged 40 percent of the homes.  Consequently, residents heeded warnings from...


 * In the paragraph that begins with Despite the cyclone's strength, its effects were relatively minor. But then you go right into discussing its strength. Port Hedland recorded winds up to ....  So and so else recorded.... Rainfall exceeded in, well above average.

Then, new paragraph, despite these indicators of the cyclone's strength, its effects were relatively minor. Then, what were the effects and damages.

It seems to me that the prose is not ready for prime time. Just MHO. Auntieruth55 (talk) 17:06, 2 February 2010 (UTC)