Talk:Daisy Jugadai Napaltjarri/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: –– Jezhotwells (talk) 11:33, 1 April 2010 (UTC)

I shall be reviewing this article against the Good Article criteria, following its nomination for Good Article status.

Checking against GA criteria

 * GA review (see here for criteria)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS):
 * The Lead seems a little brief, even though this is a short article. Perhaps a mention of her role at the Women's Centre, painting of dreamings, use of acrylics, etc. ✅
 * Way too brief, what was i thinking? Expanded (though still short). hamiltonstone (talk) 06:12, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
 * Life: Daisy Jugadai has an older sister, artist Molly Jugadai Napaltjarri. Her childhood was spent at both Haasts Bluff and a nearby camp, Five Mile, while she was schooled at Papunya. She married Kelly Multa, and they had a daughter Agnes. They lived on an outstation, Kungkayunti, but Daisy moved back to Haasts Bluff when Kelly died.  I find this a bit clumsy, please consider re-arranging. At the moment attention is transferred to the sister, then presumably we are back to the artcile subject, but this is not clear. ✅
 * Reordered, and some more detail added. hamiltonstone (talk) 03:26, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
 * Background: Spinifex, clarify is this the grass or the Spinifex people - perhaps a wikilink, or just a mention of spinfex grass if that is what it is. ✅
 * linked. hamiltonstone (talk) 03:26, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
 * Career: The Hermannsburg School is wikilinked, but we should not assume that readers will click on every wikilink, perhaps a few words to explain that this is an 1930s movement established in the Alice Springs area. ✅
 * Done. hamiltonstone (talk) 03:26, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
 * Nangara (also known as the Ebes Collection) I think Nangara needs some explanation. Fine, the refernce suffices. ✅
 * Don't know what I can offer here: "Nangara" is simply the name of the collection (as I understand it). What kind of explanation did you have in mind? hamiltonstone (talk) 03:26, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
 * I made one minor copy-edit to improve the flow.
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * All online references check out. Assume Good Faith for offline
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * We only have commentary from one critic, Morag Fraser. Is there not more?
 * This reference gives some commentary and also the fact that her mother and sister are artists, which fact does not appear in the article.
 * I don't know if you can access this article:                Daisy Napaltjarri Jugadai, 1955-2008,  Strocchi, Marina.   Art and Australia v. 46 no. 1 (Spring 2008) p. 61  2008  Australian painter Daisy Napaltjarri Jugadai died in 2008.  Jugadai painted lush landscapes that were infinitely complex in color and structure, although they are often referred to as nav̈e.  She mixed many colors to meticulously record the vegetation of specific sites, adding fine details with a matchstick.  This may well have more information. ✅
 * I have added a little more from both Martin and from Strocchi in Art and Australia. I am not aware of any other sources containing critical commentary. There are a number of reference books on Australian Indigenous Art that i checked but had nothing. hamiltonstone (talk) 05:57, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * On hold for seven days, some prose needs fixing, perhaps a little more eresearch, a few explanations. 12:30, 1 April 2010 (UTC) ✅
 * Thanks for your hard work, I am more than happy to pass this as an interesting good article. –– Jezhotwells (talk) 16:53, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
 * Pass/Fail:
 * On hold for seven days, some prose needs fixing, perhaps a little more eresearch, a few explanations. 12:30, 1 April 2010 (UTC) ✅
 * Thanks for your hard work, I am more than happy to pass this as an interesting good article. –– Jezhotwells (talk) 16:53, 2 April 2010 (UTC)

Thanks Jez - i'll get on to it in next couple of days. offline now. hamiltonstone (talk) 21:06, 1 April 2010 (UTC)