Talk:Darejan Dadiani/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Calvin999 (talk · contribs) 20:41, 26 August 2015 (UTC)

Hi. I'm Calvin999 and I am reviewing this nomination. — Calvin999 20:58, 26 August 2015 (UTC)

are you continuing with this? sst✈ 09:19, 11 October 2015 (UTC)
 * I completely forgot I had opened this to be honest. — Calvin999  10:37, 11 October 2015 (UTC)
 * , So the question wasn't actually answered.  Calvin999, are you going to review this nomination? — Maile  (talk) 20:46, 14 October 2015 (UTC)
 * Yes I will today. — Calvin999  08:19, 15 October 2015 (UTC)


 * One connection issue
 * Add her age to the date and place of death in the Info box
 * The article title and info box says Darejan Dadiani but the lead just says Darejan?
 * was the third wife of the Georgian monarch Heraclius II and, thus, the queen consort of Kakheti and then also of Kartli in eastern Georgia. → was Queen Consort of Kakheti, and later Kartli-Kakheti in Eastern Georgia, as the wife of King Heraclius II.
 * Darejan wed Heraclius in 1750. Their 48 years of marriage produced 23 children. In the closing years of Heraclius's reign, Darejan exerted significant influence on politics and court affairs. → Darajan married Heraclius in 1750 and their marriage lasts 48 years until his death in 1798; the union produced 23 children. In the final years of her husbands reign, Darejan exerted significant influence on politics and court affairs.
 * whose progeny she tried to prevent from succeeding to the throne of Georgia. → What does progeny mean? I don't understand the sentence as a result.
 * After the Russian annexation of Georgia, Queen Dowager Darejan was deported to Russia proper in 1803. → You need to say that following his death, I kind of helped you out with my suggestion above with this, but at the moment all the sentences are bit lumped together.
 * was buried there, at the Alexander Nevsky Lavra. → and was buried at the Alexander Nevsky Lavra.
 * Lead says Katsia-Giorgi Dadiani, Early life and marriage says Katsia (Giorgi) Dadiani. Pick one and be consistent.
 * She was only 12 years old in 1750, when Heraclius, then reigning in Kakheti, chose her as his third wife, a year after his second wife, Ana Abashidze, died. → There are so many clauses here. It makes it difficult to read.
 * Is this entire section attributed just to the final citation at the end?
 * The couple's first better documented child, → This is poorly worded
 * in the period → Remove
 * In the last years of Heraclius II, → in what?
 * her influence became to be felt. → Okay?
 * In 1791 Darejan → Comma after the date
 * , George, now King George XII, → the now King George XII
 * , on one hand, and Darejan and her sons, on the other → This could be worded so much simpler
 * Another major point at issue between → Same here
 * neighbor → Should American English be being used here?
 * In 1800 one → Comma after date
 * You flick between Queen Dowager Darejan and just Darejan. Pick one.
 * Ivan Lazarev, issued → No need for the comma
 * Shouldn't Tsar be capitalised?
 * Queen Dowager and her sons → If you're going to use this, then it should be 'The Queen Dowager...'
 * Once, the general infuriated her → Way too conversational
 * reached full age. → reached adulthood

Sorry it took so long to review. i completely forgot I had even opened it. Thanks for your patience. Next time, ping me much sooner! On hold. — Calvin999 17:37, 17 October 2015 (UTC)
 * I've addressed those issues. As for progeny, its her personal children/descendants born with Heraclius. Jaqeli 20:56, 17 October 2015 (UTC)
 * Oh there seems to be an issue with the date parameter in one of the references at the bottom of the article too. — Calvin999  20:58, 17 October 2015 (UTC)
 * Done. Jaqeli 21:24, 17 October 2015 (UTC)
 * PAssing. :) — Calvin999  21:25, 17 October 2015 (UTC)