Talk:Daruvar Agreement/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Khanate General (talk · contribs) 21:36, 15 December 2013 (UTC)


 * Will review in the next few days.--Khanate General ☪ talk project mongol conquests 21:36, 15 December 2013 (UTC)

General

 * No disambiguation links.
 * No neutrality issues.
 * Copyright tags for the pictures look fine.
 * No missing in-line citations.
 * No original research.
 * Article is stable.
 * "the Sector West" Remove the "the". Proper names only need definite articles if it's a shorthand like "the Amazon", if it contains nouns that are normally common nouns like "the United Sates", or if there's a tradition of using it like "the Ukraine". That's not the case for Sector West. This is also proven by a search on GBooks.
 * The lead should sum up more of the aftermath, including what happened with Fischer.

Background

 * "As a consequence of organisational problems and breaches of ceasefire the UNPROFOR, did not start to deploy until 8 March." Comma should be before "UNPROFOR". Unless there's a verb miss between "ceasefire" and "the"?
 * "a diplomatic recognition" Remove the "a". "Diplomatic recognition" is not countable.
 * "A part of the western Slavonia" Remove the "the".
 * "A part of the western Slavonia, encompassing an area extending approximately 90 by 45 km was designated as the UNPA of Western Slavonia" In the sentence, "encompassing an area extending approximately" is a paranthetical phrase, so there should be a comma after "km".
 * "—approximately a third of the UNPA located in the south," When enclosing a parenthetical phrase with an emdash, the emdash needs to be on both ends. The comma should be replaced with the emdash, or vice versa.

Cooperation schemes

 * "unaccessible" is misspelled.
 * "Sector west suffered from severe shortage of fuel" Proper name. West should be capitalized.
 * "to propose a degree of cooperation between local authorities on either side in the area" Wouldn't an agreement by definition require the participation of both sides? Replace "either" with "both"?
 * "RSK-held part o the Sector West" Replace "o" with "of".
 * "a wider support for the cooperation". Remove the "a", support is not countable.

Aftermath
Thank you for your time and effort. I believe I have addressed all the issues you raised above except the two marked separately requesting your feedback. Cheers--Tomobe03 (talk) 10:58, 20 December 2013 (UTC)
 * "to admission of admission of" "Admission of" repeated twice.
 * "unfeasibility" is misspelled.
 * Hm, I checked this one but I'm not quite sure what do you mean?--Tomobe03 (talk) 10:58, 20 December 2013 (UTC)
 * It's complicated. Turns out it's a rare variant that fell out of American usage in the 1970s. "Unfeasible" had been dominant since the 16th century, but its popularity dropped in the latter half of the 20th century. It's less common, but not wrong. My mistake, so I struck it out.--Khanate General ☪ talk project mongol conquests 12:17, 20 December 2013 (UTC)
 * "only, failed to note existence" Conjunction missing between the comma and "failed".
 * "Moreover, Fischer, Zabala and Platzer were criticised by the UN, citing their excessive assertiveness in the matter." Why was it considered too assertive?
 * The sources don't say. They do say it was considered excessively assertive, but not why.--Tomobe03 (talk) 10:58, 20 December 2013 (UTC)
 * That's fine. The article still meets the GA criteria.--Khanate General ☪ talk project mongol conquests 12:28, 20 December 2013 (UTC)
 * Excellent work. This article passes as a GA. Congratulations.--Khanate General ☪ talk project mongol conquests 12:28, 20 December 2013 (UTC)