Talk:Deus Ex: Human Revolution/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Famous Hobo (talk · contribs) 03:37, 21 August 2016 (UTC)

Oh boy, this is one huge article. But hey, someone's got to take up the review, so I figured I might as well. Since this article is big, this may take me a while to review. Famous Hobo (talk) 03:37, 21 August 2016 (UTC)
 * You know, I'm a terrible person. I knew that I was missing something. Alright, enough messing around, let's get this done.

Lead
 * Deus Ex: Human Revolution is a cyberpunk-themed action role-playing video game—combining first-person shooter, stealth and role-playing elements—developed by Eidos Montreal and published worldwide by Square Enix in August 2011 for Microsoft Windows, PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360. Hmm, this opening line is a really bulky read for a non-gamer. You may want to cut some things. For example: Cyberpunk themed isn't a conventional video game genre, and it's not needed in the first sentence, besides the plot paragraph pretty much tells the reader it's cyberpunk. Also, I'd remove the "combining first-person shooter, stealth and role-playing elements", as for a non-gamer reader, these are just a bunch of terms in a row that make no sense, and each has to individually be clicked on to learn what they are. Usually in the lead sentence for video game articles, it's okay just to include the overarching genre, then go into more detail in the gameplay section.
 * Development of Human Revolution started in 2007 with a small team within the fledgling Eidos Montreal studio, after multiple aborted attempts to create a sequel at original developer Ion Storm following the 2003 release of Deus Ex: Invisible War. Instead of started, try began

Gameplay
 * The game's environments, ranging from open world hubs to more scripted environments, are explored in first-person, although actions such as hiding behind cover, conversing with non-playable characters (NPCs), and some attack animations switch to a third-person view. Link open world, first person, and third-person view.
 * Augmentations must be turned on or off manually, with some being automatically mapped to hotkeys or controller buttons such as cloaking. Honestly, is this important enough to mention? This seems a bit game guidey to me.
 * the pathway is accessed from the O/S port by opening "directory" nodes to reach the Registry. What is an O/S? Also, why is registry in uppercase?

Plot
 * Alongside this, global megacorporations have come to eclipse government authority in power and influence, while private military forces dwarf the sanctioned armies of first world countries. Link first world
 * Augmentations also come with the necessity of taking Neuropozyne, a limited and expensive immunosuppressant drug that stops the body rejecting the technology. Link Immunosuppressive drug

Development
 * After the release of Invisible War, multiple attempts were made to develop a second sequel, even after Spector left Ion Storm. Why not just say sequel? For example, Gears of War 3 is the sequel to Gears of War 2, not the second sequel to Gears of War (well, technically it is, but most people just say it's the sequel to the second game)
 * Another aborted attempts, intended as the fourth Deus Ex project following Insurrection, led to the development of Project Snowblind. Grammar mistake, shouldn't it just be Another aborted attempt?
 * The prospective development of Deus Ex 3 was halted when, following further staff departure and financial difficulties, the studio's owner Eidos Interactive closed them down in 2005. So I'm confused, was Ion Storm going to pick the second project dubbed Deus Ex 3 before they got shut down, or are you just referring to the sequel as Deus Ex 3. If it's the latter, then say "The prospective development of the third Deus Ex game was halted..."
 * The early period was devoted to reading books as research before performing brainstorming sessions to create the game's basic concepts. What kind of books? It's a little ambiguous, and I doubt they read Pride and Prejudice as research
 * One of the things established early on was that it would be an ambitious project and they needed to bring the key staff on board as early as possible. I always hated the use of "things", try goals
 * One of the things they started with was playing the first two games, determining what they liked and disliked about the original Deus Ex, and how they could carry over or improve these points. One of their first decisions was to remain true to the series' core values, despite Human Revolution being essentially a series reboot. Three straight sentences begin with "One of", try rewording it.
 * When presenting their project to Eidos management, they presented multiple sheets of their concept, and after two days they were given the go-ahead. Don't use presenting twice in the same sentence. Try "When pitching their project to Eidos management, they presented multiple sheets of their concept, and after two days the game was green-lit."
 * Despite the initial intentions and an early tech demo going smoothly, the engine quickly proved to be inadequate to the team's needs as Eidos Montreal and Crystal Dynamics were pulling the engine's needs in different directions. Again, try not to use "needs" twice in the same sentence.
 * These included Rainbow Six: Vegas for the cover system and tactical combat; 'F.E.A.R. for the design of AI... You left a ' before F.E.A.R.
 * Interactive hacking was one of the earliest things the team had decided upon, alongside not including quick time events. Link quick time events
 * They were designed to involve tension, and require a survey of both the surroundings and the security system while at the same time providing rewards. Perhaps switch "involve" to "invoke"?
 * The Children of Men was used to capture the setting and resultant chaotic drama, Bioshock gave them a reference for the handling of mature themes... Delink Bioshock, as it was already linked
 * while the original Deus Ex used technological elements common at the time it was made such as 4:3 screen ratio monitors and landline telephones... I think it might be a good idea to link 4:3 to aspect ratio, since some people might not know what that is
 * McCann, when comparing Human Revolution with his prior work on Ubisoft's Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell: Double Agent, stated that the latter could be scored more like a feature film due to its linear nature, while Human Revolution's non-linear approach to both gameplay and story. I've read this sentence multiple times, and I think you may be missing something. Either that, or I'm an idiot.
 * Vocals also evoked slight religious overtones, which again connected to the use of the number three. You need to go into greater detail about how the religious overtones connect to three. Off the top of my head, it may be connected to the Trinity, but I'm not sure. However, if the source doesn't go into more detail, then it's fine to leave it as is.
 * Original Sound Version's Gideon Dabi, commenting on the game's music prior to the album's commercial release, was highly positive about McCann's work, calling it "a tremendous upgrade over its predecessors" and praising its low-key impact. What makes Original Sound Version a reliable source?

Release
 * Could you write a sentence or two about the plot of The Missing Link?
 * So did nothing come of the film adaptation? I thought it was still in production

Reception
 * My only issue is with the Director's Cut. Did any reviewers comment on the audio commentary? From what I remember, that was kind of a big deal back when it was released. Then again, my memories about the Director's Cut are a bit hazy.

Legacy
 * Wouldn't the section title "Sequels" be better? When I think legacy, I think how the game has impacted the industry or other aspects of gaming, like Grand Theft Auto III.

So now the review is done. Seriously, I do apologize for the lengthy delay of the review, no excuses there. I'll leave this on hold for now, but although the standard waiting time for reviews on hold is seven days, since I let this review sit for so long, you can take all the time you need. Famous Hobo (talk) 23:17, 12 October 2016 (UTC)
 * I've addressed as many points as possible. What I couldn't elaborate, I've removed as it's not essential to the prose. Original Sound Version has been accepted in other GA reviews as a source of independent reviews for commercial game soundtracks. As to the Director's Cut, what's there is what's there, they didn't really go into the special features. --ProtoDrake (talk) 07:33, 13 October 2016 (UTC)

I have the impression that nothing is getting done here. Cognissonance (talk) 00:08, 27 October 2016 (UTC)
 * Your right, this should have been done a long time ago. ProtoDrake, it's been a long time coming, and you've been a saint about this. Here you go, passing. Famous Hobo (talk) 00:12, 27 October 2016 (UTC)