Talk:Disability Day of Mourning/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: GhostRiver (talk · contribs) 17:50, 15 March 2022 (UTC)

Hello! I'll be reviewing this article to help reduce the good article nomination backlog and to gain points in the WP:WIKICUP. Although quid pro quo is not required, if you fancy returning the favor, I have a list of articles in need of review here. —  Ghost River  17:50, 15 March 2022 (UTC)

Lede

 * "as a commemoration of" "to commemorate"
 * "by their caregivers"
 * "different to" "different from"
 * I believe "acceptable" runs afoul of MOS:QUOTEPOV
 * Thanks for picking this up, ! My activity is a bit sporadic right now, but I should be able to handle this. I'll get the first three of those, although I'm not sure what the best way to handle the last one is -- I can't think of a good rewording. Vaticidalprophet 12:00, 16 March 2022 (UTC)
 * I think saying "more socially acceptable" might work, because it doesn't take a moral stance, just reflects culture. And I'm recovering from the stomach flu myself, so it's okay if you need a little time! The article's short enough that we should both be good. —  Ghost River  15:49, 16 March 2022 (UTC)

History

 * I had an undergraduate professor who was adamant about not starting sentences with "however"
 * The second sentence is also quite long with a lot going on and can probably be split into two
 * Sounds incredibly pedantic, but "autistic" in the sentence about George Hodgins should probably link to Autism ✅
 * I don't know, I don't love the letter to the editor being used as a source, but I also know that finding reliable sources on disability advocacy before a certain point is nigh impossible because of various erasures
 * I did find this source from a local news agency to supplement the last sentence of the first paragraph
 * disability-related days Is there a better synonym for "days", or at least a descriptor? I know they're not holidays, but
 * First sentence of second paragraph should be broken up or rephrased, as "such as" is repeated twice in one sentence ✅
 * "Such simulators' "Such simulations", I think, as the experience is the really controversial element, not the specific technique (i.e. "wearing blindfolds" vs. "wearing blackout sunglasses" is not the issue, the exercise itself is) ✅

Observance

 * Should mention in this section that the day itself is on 1 March ✅
 * "In addition to the United States" "Outside of the United States" (I get that this might read as US-centric, but if the holiday originated here, I think it's alright) ✅
 * "Due to the large number of names" ✅
 * Third paragraph should be moved up, I think, because then the first two are the "how" and third and fourth are "why/who" ✅

Impact

 * "However, over time," "Over time, however," ✅
 * "under then-President Barack Obama read a statement from the President" "read a statement from then-President Barack Obama" ✅
 * reader's community Syntax is a little confusing, makes it sound as if "reader" is a synonym for an autistic person and not "someone reading the toolkit" ✅
 * "has been discussed" "have been discussed", as two phenomena are mentioned ✅
 * "how pervasive ableism is" "the pervasive nature of ableism" ✅
 * Washington Post should be italicized as the name of a newspaper ✅

General comments

 * No photos in article, so nothing to assess there
 * No stability concerns in the revision history
 * Earwig score looks good, mostly falls under WP:LIMITED
 * As an article on a holiday that began in the US, should this be in American English?

Putting on hold for now, feel free to ping me with questions and let me know when you're finished! —  Ghost River  16:09, 16 March 2022 (UTC)
 * Just a quick ping on this. I saw that an IP has addressed most of the points. —  Ghost River  16:03, 30 March 2022 (UTC)
 * Thanks for keeping this up with my spotty activity. Do you think it's good now? I've done a fair bit and I also saw the IP editing. Sorry I haven't been around much. Vaticidalprophet 19:34, 31 March 2022 (UTC)
 * I think everything is good now (or I was just overly picky the first time I gave this a look-over). Passing now. —  Ghost River  20:40, 1 April 2022 (UTC)