Talk:Dr. Luigi/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Eviolite (talk · contribs) 04:12, 18 April 2022 (UTC)

Hi, I'll take this one. Please remind me if I don't get to it within ~4 days. ev iolite  (talk)  04:12, 18 April 2022 (UTC)


 * @Eviolite, courtesy ping. Panini!  • 🥪 11:59, 22 April 2022 (UTC)


 * GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * I have some prose comments below.
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):  d (copyvio and plagiarism):
 * Sources all reliable per VGRS for their usecase, no copyvio detected. Some minor issues from spotchecks discussed below.
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * Standard video game article format.
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * Looks good to me.
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * I am PerryPerryD, I am here to quickly assist this review :). Looking at the article's history, only minor reversions have taken place and no bad-faith edits have been made. I would say that this article passes Stability. PerryPerryD  Talk To Me 15:32, 22 April 2022 (UTC)
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * File:Dr. Luigi Gameplay.jpeg should use, not the one for cover art. Usage is fine. No alt text but that's not required for GA.
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:

Lead

 * What is the source for the Japanese name?
 * ✅ Sourced


 * "is the sixth in" -> "is the sixth game in" for clarity
 * ✅ I may have just forgotten "game" there.


 * You say there are four modes but list three and "various multiplayer options"; is the multiplayer one cohesive mode? If so, it should be listed as such.
 * ✅ Specified "local and online"


 * I recommend changing "that utilizes L-shaped pills" to "which utilizes L-shaped pills" and using semicolons to separate the list items as there is a commaed description of each one, which may get confusing.
 * ✅ used a semicolon per ";"


 * "This release" -> "Its release", perhaps
 * ✅ Perhapsed


 * MOS:DATECOMMA suggests putting a comma after "2013" in "December 31, 2013" (and one is used in the same situation in "Development and release").
 * ✅ ,'ed


 * "worldwide January 15, 2014" -> "January 15, 2014, worldwide" maybe?
 * ✅ Hmm, just maybe...


 * "across its various modes" reads a bit weird, maybe "regarding"?
 * ✅ Refarded


 * "It was followed by" - maybe "The game was followed by"
 * ✅ Followed

Gameplay

 * I only skimmed the source, but can't find where.
 * The first paragraph says it's about "Operation L", but doesn't reference that mode's main gimmick, and it presumably applies to the other modes too, so I think "the standard game mode, "Operation L"" should be removed.
 * ✅ Removed


 * I can't find where the Eurogamer source talks about the bottle's neck and game covering.
 * ✅ It's hard to find sources that cover simple gameplay info such as game overs, so I believe I skipped over it to return to later (and never did return). I found that Nintendo Life glanced over the subject.


 * "USGamer" should be "USgamer" in source 5
 * ✅ Lowercased


 * "that is in Dr. Mario Online Rx" -> "that is also in ..."?


 * Can you elaborate on what the "traditional Dr. Mario series rules" are?
 * ✅ Elaborated


 * "the private playing field" - "their own playing field" for clarity?
 * ✅, That's what I had originally

Development and release

 * Any details on Nintendo SPD's role in it?
 * Well, there aren't even any details on the whole game, really. This source mentioning their role is all I could find.


 * I don't see that the source says it's unchanged from Online RX, while it does say it reuses graphics and sound rather than upgrading it.
 * ✅ Reworded


 * VGRS suggests to replace Siliconera with a high quality source whenever possible, and the IGN source you use at the end of this paragraph does back the statement up, so IMO it should be replaced with that.
 * ✅ Removed

Reception

 * VG247 link is broken (has a "+" at the end of it).
 * ✅ Minused


 * I don't see that the source backs up "Operation L [is] in its successor, Dr. Mario: Miracle Cure", and I'm not sure if it should be in this section anyway.
 * ✅ Replaced source, moved to development


 * "Game Informer often played Retro Remedy instead of Operation L due in part that the randomly generated levels made the latter too difficult in most cases." - the specific reviewer should be mentioned, and maybe "due in part that the randomly generated levels made the latter too difficult in most cases" should be reworded to something like "due in part to the difficulty of randomly-generated Operation L levels". You also do mention Futter later (and link Game Informer again), so that should also be tweaked.


 * "like the last game" - clarify
 * ✅ Clarified


 * "all the mode options" - "all of the modes"?
 * ✅ Yes


 * "but the contents still worked" - should make clearer that this is still according to them, maybe "but thought that the contents still worked" or similar.
 * ✅ Reworked


 * Add a comma after "according to Kuchera"


 * Add a reference to Meyer's source at the end of the paragraph.
 * ✅ Ref'd

End matter

 * New Super Luigi U could probably do with an annotation in the "See also" section.

see the template and comments above. Regards, ev iolite   (talk)  16:51, 22 April 2022 (UTC)


 * ping correctly ev iolite   (talk)  16:52, 22 April 2022 (UTC)
 * @Eviolite, that should be everything. Panini!  • 🥪 03:03, 23 April 2022 (UTC)
 * Thank you, ; I've made a few minor copyedits on a second pass and am happy to pass this nomination now. Good work! ev iolite   (talk)  04:16, 23 April 2022 (UTC)