Talk:E.V.O.: Search for Eden/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Someone another (talk • message • contribs • count  • [/wiki/Special:Log?user= logs ] • email) 16:52, 3 September 2011 (UTC)

OK, I'm still tweaking the article as I go along, rather than leave a laundry list of minor tasks here. GA criteria 3, 4 and 5 (breadth of coverage, neutrality and stability) are all fine so we can put them aside.

The first criteria is mostly covered ('well-written'), but I'm still working on that. There are a couple of specific points here:
 * The first citation is in the lead, and is the only one there, could this be moved into the body of the article itself please, and also could you ensure that the details linked to it are duplicated in the article itself.
 * On that same citation, could you remove the link to Hardcore Gaming 101 and collapse it back to being a reference to Retro Gamer only, it's good to be able to read the details online but I'd rather not have anyone flagging up copyright.
 * I added 'horns' to the dashing attack, but I also remember that it's possible to jump on enemies to attack them, would you consider adding this information in with a cite?
 * In Gameplay the map screen is referred to when the lack of a game-over feature is discussed, but it isn't before then, could some details about the map screen go in the previous paragraph please?

The second criteria (factually accurate and verifiable) deals with reliable sources in part b.
 * What makes the Free Information Society and AllRPG, cites 21 and 22 respectively, reliable sources?
 * I am not able, like the vast majority of users, to make head nor tail of the Japanese-language citations, and have to accept them on good faith.
 * The last sentence from Audio, starting "Like the soundtrack for the game's successor..." has no cite, could that be rectified please?

The sixth criteria, illustrations:
 * The image fair use rationales are OK but ideally could do with some bulking up, hammering home why they're so important.
 * The main gameplay image, exploring the asteroid, doesn't actually communicate a lot. There's no enemies, the setting is unusual rather than typical to the rest of the game, there's just not a lot going on there. Would it be possible to replace it with a more dynamic shot, and use the description to highlight areas of the game screen like the evo point and HP displays?

That's it for now, I must stress this is still early days for the review as there are still things I'd like to tweak, all the links need checking and I want to double check information given against sources etc., so more requests may be made before the article is passed. Thank you. Someoneanother 16:28, 5 September 2011 (UTC)
 * In progress, but on the image replacement, I like this one after doing some browsing and will likely upload that (though num 44 could work too); if you have another one in mind then let me know. Wizardman  Operation Big Bear 01:33, 7 September 2011 (UTC)
 * Anything that you think, it's just that the current one is atypical of what the majority of the game is about; chasing critters around and biting them. Someoneanother 14:57, 7 September 2011 (UTC)
 * Issues fixed, mostly. AllRPG seems like a professional source for game reviews, but I'll look for something definitive on that. Free Information Society, after re-reading it over again, I'm doubting the reliability so I'll likely remove it. Wizardman  Operation Big Bear 21:59, 9 September 2011 (UTC)
 * I think there's only 2 things left. The new screenshot could do with a more in-depth description, covering things like health etc., also it mentions "level 2" rather than the geological age where that level is set. The other thing is AllRPG. I try not to get too hung up on WP:RS, but there are several things counting against it: i) the editorial process is not laid out anywhere that I could see, despite the site being a pretty robust specialist gaming site. ii) Justin Holmes isn't listed as a staff member, anyway. iii) The article has several top-drawer magazine reviews for citations, resulting in a stark contrast, and iv) the citation is used for a single sentence, which is in no way weight-bearing. For the sake of that sentence I would strongly prefer it to be removed. That's it as far as I can see. Someoneanother 17:25, 13 September 2011 (UTC)
 * I went ahead and expanded the caption, as well as removed the sentence with that cite. Wizardman  Operation Big Bear 17:59, 13 September 2011 (UTC)
 * Sorry to be a nuisance, but "Rather than featuring the same instrumentation present in the game, the 46 Okunen Monogatari Symphonic Synth Suite soundtrack was composed of music re-recorded and arranged by Motoaki Takenouchi using a combination of electronic keyboard synth and orchestra samples to re-create it on a more sophisticated format" isn't covered by Chudah's Corner. It confirms that Takenouchi arranged the music, but doesn't mention the methods used, or the fact that they're "more sophisticated". Are you aware of where this info came from? If not I'd suggest trimming it down to stating what is stated by that source (that it was arranged by Takenouchi). Someoneanother 21:42, 13 September 2011 (UTC)
 * Removed that part. It was already in the article to begin with so I didn't think to look that over. Wizardman  Operation Big Bear 02:29, 14 September 2011 (UTC)
 * E.V.O. is now a Good Article. Thank you for your work before and during the process, thanks also to other editors who have worked on the article in the past. Someoneanother 14:57, 14 September 2011 (UTC)