Talk:Edalorhina perezi

Wiki Education assignment: Behavioral Ecology 2022
— Assignment last updated by CalJS (talk) 23:19, 16 October 2022 (UTC)

I added a section about this species' diet and made minor wording changes throughout the article to improve grammar and clarity. Otherwise, I thought this article covered the frog in a good breadth of detail.I Bet on Losing Frogs (talk) 16:49, 14 October 2022 (UTC)

Overall I think your page looks great! I fixed some spelling errors/types and linked a few wikipedia pages to terms that not everyone is going to be familiar with. I think your page would benefit from additional footnotes, especially in the characteristics section, I added a few but had some trouble finding the information in the references. Sophie Eichler — Preceding undated comment added 03:22, 20 October 2022 (UTC)

Entry Peer Review
A lot of really yummy info added to the entry! The mating and parental care sections were really well written; they had great flow. The section on description I understand its a tedium to digest for the reader and much easier to leave it as is w/ the anatomical terminology but jargon makes it impossible to read for the average reader. I made some minor grammar and wording edits in the rest of the entry. Overall solid job :)

Lead

Changed passive to active voice

Removed, “However, this was assessed in 2004, so an update is needed.” Appears to be an opinion?

Description

“The body is a concave shape” this is unclear

Removed comma splices

General grammar edits

Removed colorful words like decorated and assumptive words like random

Explain instead of using jargon e.g. dextral vent tube, terminal oral discs, filiform median ridge, etc.

Geographical Variation

I feel like this section was paraphrased instead of summarized, there is too much jargon

Habitat and Distribution, Diet, and Mating

These sections are well written, concise, and easy to read/understand. The Mating section is really well done.

Reproduction and Life Cycle

“the tadpoles grow to a total length of 10.5 mm.” removed because it appears to be discontinued Elwhoelwu (talk) 00:49, 19 October 2022 (UTC)

Peer Review comments and changes
This was a really strong, well-researched, and clear article. Well done! I had a few minor edits that were mostly for formatting or grammar/clarity.

I italicized several species names that were not previously italicized, changed the section heading “population phylogeny…” to "Taxonomy" and moved it higher up on the page. I also changed the order of some sentences to “lead” with the more important fact or subject of the sentence, or reduce the flowery-ness to just focus on the the fact. I also added a ew hyperlinks to other wikipedia entries. I also took out the word "interesting" to reduce opinions (even though I agree that the fact in question was really cool).

I had a few comments as well- see below. What is Pleistocene? More information on what this is would be helpful for readers! I think that an image would have helped break up the text in the article as well, and made it more visually engaging. Gracedekoker (talk) 15:32, 19 October 2022 (UTC)Grace Dekoker