Talk:Eden Hazard/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Lemonade51 (talk · contribs) 00:38, 18 December 2011 (UTC)


 * Lead
 * "In 2005, he ventured to France." That implies it was a risk; consider "he moved to France"?
 * Done.  JS   Rant Away 03:39, 18 December 2011 (UTC)


 * Personal life
 * "He grew up in a football dominant family." 'Football dominant' isn't a term as far as I'm aware, though I understand what you mean.
 * "Carine, and father,"... Remove apostrophe after Carine.
 * 'most hated rivals'...how about "biggest rivals". 'Hate' is a strong word after all.
 * "On 19 December, Belgian and French media announced that she had given birth to a baby boy", 19 December 2054? 2011?
 * Done with issues related to Personal life section.  JS   Rant Away 03:39, 18 December 2011 (UTC)


 * Lille
 * Need en dash on three-year.
 * "After-wards, he was relegated back to the amateur level...", Afterwards doesn't need a dash. I would suggest you use another synonym: 'Following the match', 'After the match', 'Subsequently' because 'afterwards' in this case can be misconstrued. Also replace 'relegated' with 'demoted'.
 * "...one goal helping the reserve team finished in fifth place..."; past principle not needed - ...Should be "finish in fifth place".
 * "Hazard finished his amateur career with 11 appearances and one goal helping the reserve..." - put an apostrophe after goal.
 * Done with issues related to Lille section.  JS   Rant Away 03:39, 18 December 2011 (UTC)


 * 2008–09 season
 * "For the 2008–09 season, Hazard switched to the number 26 shirt"; What was his shirt number before? I would advise you to replace 'switched' with 'given the shirt number 26' as amateur footballers may not have fixed numbers.
 * "His positive performances" → "assured performances"
 * "game-winning goal"... - how about 'match-winning'?
 * "Hazard started eight and contributed to the team finishing in 5th place"...I have no problem with the sentence, just maybe spell out 5th as 'fifth' for consistency perhaps.
 * Done with issues related to 2008–09 season section.  JS   Rant Away 03:39, 18 December 2011 (UTC)


 * 2009–10 season
 * "Notable clubs included English clubs..." How about starting off the sentence with "These included English clubs Arsenal..."
 * "A month later, Hazard was instrumental in Lille's 5–1 thrashing of Czech club Slavia Prague as he was partly responsible for the opening goal after slicing through" - replace 'after' with an em dash.
 * "Hazard began the 2009–10 season on a quick note scoring in the Lille's first competitive match of the season"... two things: 1) Replace 'quick' with 'positive' and 2) remove 'the' from Lille; the club's name isn't a definitive article.
 * Derby du Nord has already been wiki linked under 'Personal life'.
 * "The victory helped the club achieve stability in the league by keeping them in the UEFA Champions League places and, also, ended a disaster of a week which saw Lille suffer elimination from both of France's cup competitions." Doesn't make any grammatical sense. I would suggest breaking the sentence into two if you can.
 * "He is the first player, since the award's inception" → "He became the first player since its inception in 1994 to win the award twice."
 * Done with issues related to 2009–10 season section.  JS   Rant Away 03:39, 18 December 2011 (UTC)


 * 2010–11 season
 * "Following the international break, Hazard re-captured his scoring form"... Recaptured doesn't need a dash.
 * "Hazard began the 2011 portion of the season"... Ambiguous. What defines a portion in a league season? More so, a year? Consider "At the turn of the calander year, Hazard began...".
 * "...Lille eight points clear as league leader in the table" → "...Lille eight points clear at the top of the league table."
 * Done with issues related to 2010–11 season section.  JS   Rant Away 03:39, 18 December 2011 (UTC)


 * 2011–12 season
 * "Three days later" → How about "Three days after"
 * "Fours days later" → "Four days later"
 * "In his second career Champions League appearance"...I'm not sure if it's necessary to mention that. Maybe "Against Turkish outfit Trabzonspor on [insert month and date], Hazard assisted Lille's only goal..."
 * "game-winning goal" → how about 'match-winning'?
 * "Due to his increase participation with Lille's first team"...'Due to' is used in the previous sentence. Rephrase.
 * Could include desire to join Chelsea — Preceding unsigned comment added by 86.147.118.85 (talk) 22:24, 28 May 2012 (UTC)
 * Done with issues related to 2011–12 season section. —  JS   Rant Away 02:00, 19 December 2011 (UTC)


 * Senior
 * "Although, Hazard is still eligible to represent Belgium on youth level"...remove comma.
 * Done —  JS   Rant Away 02:00, 19 December 2011 (UTC)


 * Youth
 * "Hazard bypassed the Belgian under-18 team and began earning call-ups to the under-19 team in October 2007." Need reference on that.
 * Couldn't find a source stating he bypassed the under-18 team, so I rephrased the sentence. —  JS   Rant Away 18:42, 19 December 2011 (UTC)
 * That'll do for now. — Lemonade51 (talk) 19:14, 19 December 2011 (UTC)


 * Comments
 * If you were considering this for WP:FAC, then I suggest you may need to get this peer reviewed because prose might be the big problem. Having said that and giving it a read through today, I think it's perfectly acceptable for GA status. Broad in its coverage, netural with good sources and nice array of images. Plus there is always room for improvement. Good job. — Lemonade51 (talk) 19:14, 19 December 2011 (UTC)
 * Thanks. I appreciate your help. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Joao10Siamun (talk • contribs) 19:26, 19 December 2011 (UTC)