Talk:Esperanza Spalding/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Alanna the Brave (talk · contribs) 20:16, 20 April 2021 (UTC)

I'll be reviewing this article. Comments to follow over the next few days! Alanna the Brave (talk) 20:16, 20 April 2021 (UTC)

Alrighty -- I think the prose and MOS formatting are solid. The article is stable and neutral, and all photos are properly tagged with creative commons info. I've done a spot check of some sources. Although Earwig's Copyvio Detector flagged a couple of websites, I compared them with previous versions of the Wikipedia article and am satisfied that the external sites have copied Wikipedia (not vice versa) -- I've listed them as "backwards copies" on the Talk Page. Despite this article's strengths, however, there are still issues that need addressing: for example, some content is uncited, some citations have broken links or are missing author info, and some article information needs expanding/trimming/clarifying. Here are my initial comments below:

2004-2007

 * Was Esperanza released during this time? When did Spalding sign with Head's Up? Unclear.
 * Was she actively performing during this time, or just studying/teaching?

2008-2010

 * As per previous comments: when was Esperanza released?
 * There are a couple of uncited sentences (together) – I’ve tagged them.
 * I recommend moving the info about why Spalding plays the bass into the "Early life and education" section. Just because she's discussing it in 2008 doesn't make it especially relevant to 2008. You can probably condense the info too -- just keep the core details.
 * I think you should cut the final sentence about her being "the most searched person" on Google -- it's not a formal achievement/form of recognition, and I suspect many other artists have experienced high rates of Google searches.

2011-2015

 * What was “surprising” about Spalding’s Grammy win? --> Lead section says she was first Jazz artist to win this award. If so, please mention and include citation.
 * This section is missing some Grammy award nomination/win info related to the Radio Music Society. --> See Accolades table.
 * When was Chamber Music Society released? Unclear. If it was earlier than 2011, it should be introduced in the previous section.
 * You should add a mention of Spalding’s Soul Train and Smithsonian awards from 2012 (see article’s lead and list of accolades)
 * Three items in this section are currently uncited – I’ve tagged them.

2016-present

 * Two items in this section are currently uncited – I’ve tagged them.
 * Missing info: according to the lead section, Spalding received an honorary doctorate and gave a commencement speech at Berklee in 2018. This should be mentioned here.
 * “It is scheduled to premiere in fall 2021” --> This sentence should avoid seasonal references, as per MOS:SEASON

Artistry

 * At the moment, the first three paragraphs of this section are a slightly tangled mixture of (1) human influences and (2) musical genre influences. I think it would be helpful to more clearly separate and organize this information.
 * I’m not convinced the list of instruments is particularly useful. Do we know for sure Spalding is still using the same instruments she used in 2013? Are these particular instruments a significant influence on her musical style? If yes, the list should be expanded into paragraph-style information to make it clear why it matters. If not, I think we can cut out this list entirely.
 * Is Spalding’s mom really a musical influence?

Personal life

 * I think it’s worth cutting the info about Spalding dating Scott for four years. It has no direct relation to her work, and it’s not a current or seemingly significant relationship. Scott’s WP article contains no mention of Spalding.

Philanthropy

 * I recommend removing the photo – it only vaguely relates to the section, and it doesn’t contribute much (there are plenty of more relevant photos of Spalding elsewhere in the article).

Accolades

 * This is a fairly small table, but I’m thinking it might make more sense to organize it by year rather than type of award. It would avoid making the reader jump back and forth between different years.