Talk:Fakhr al-Din Iraqi/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Mike Christie (talk · contribs) 16:21, 21 August 2022 (UTC)

I'll review this. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 16:21, 21 August 2022 (UTC)

Image is appropriately tagged; sources are reliable.
 * "which is mostly written in the form of a ghazal". Suggest "most of which were written in the form of a ghazal".  Similarly in the body you have "The divan of Iraqi is mostly written in the form of a ghazal": suggest "The divan of Iraqi is mostly written in the form of ghazals".
 * "the leader of the Multani branch of the Suhrawardiyya": suggest "a Sufi sect" or "a Sufi order" at the end of the sentence, to help readers avoid having to click through.
 * "Iraqi settled in Konya": not a well-known location, so perhaps "in what is now Turkey"? Or "in Anatolia", as you have it in the body?
 * Done. Added the latter. --HistoryofIran (talk) 22:25, 21 August 2022 (UTC)


 * "Although the work was written in same style of Iraqi's era" is Chittick arguing that the divan may have been composed later, or just the introduction?
 * The latter. I've made it more clear now. --HistoryofIran (talk) 22:36, 21 August 2022 (UTC)


 * "Many of the stories in the Muqaddima give context for Iraqi's ghazals, but lacks historical importance": what do you mean by "lacks historical importance"?
 * Changed it a bit, thoughts? --HistoryofIran (talk) 00:50, 24 August 2022 (UTC)


 * 'They focus a lot on Iraqi's shahidbazi ("perhaps excessively" according to Feuillebois), i.e. "one who gazed upon the image of the divine witness in the faces of boys."' Is there a link for shahidbazi?  I am not at all sure what the quote is trying to say by "in the faces of boys".  Is this a reference to homosexuality?  Or to the innocence of children?  Or something else?
 * Rewrote it, should make sense now. . --HistoryofIran (talk) 00:56, 24 August 2022 (UTC)


 * Presumably the Nafahat al-uns and the Habib al-siyar have biographical information about Iraqi, but we don't say that.
 * Respectfully, the section is about the historiography of Iraqi, so surely it is relevant? This bit not only refers to the Nafahat al-uns and Habib al-siyar, but also later sources in general, which should adress what is left. --HistoryofIran (talk) 01:02, 24 August 2022 (UTC)
 * Sorry, I don't think I was clear -- what I meant was that I suspect the sentence should read "Later sources rely heavily on the information from the Muqaddima for their biographical details about Iraqi. These sources include..."  I don't think it's clear as written what it is these sources are relying on the Muqaddima for. Mike Christie (talk - contribs -  library) 01:11, 24 August 2022 (UTC)
 * Like this? --HistoryofIran (talk) 01:26, 24 August 2022 (UTC)

I'll read through again when you've addressed these; I think a bit more copyediting is needed. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 16:41, 21 August 2022 (UTC)
 * Hi again Mike. Thank you very much for yet another review! --HistoryofIran (talk) 22:25, 21 August 2022 (UTC)

Last fix looks good; passing. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 01:40, 24 August 2022 (UTC)
 * Incidentally, I'm not at all sure I'm getting the alphabetization right when I add these to the GA pages -- please correct any mistakes I make. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 01:44, 24 August 2022 (UTC)