Talk:Fire Emblem Fates/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Cognissonance (talk · contribs) 02:54, 21 October 2016 (UTC)

Waiting so long must be a bitch. Cognissonance (talk) 02:54, 21 October 2016 (UTC)

Lead

 * "The gameplay, which focuses around" — Simplify: "The gameplay, which revolves around".

Battle system

 * top-down perspective — Link to Top-down perspective
 * third-person view — Link to Virtual camera system
 * "members of each kingdoms' royal family" — Fix punctuation: "members of each kingdom's royal family".
 * "special map tiles that enables them" — Fix grammar: "special map tiles that enable them".
 * "with swords and magic beating axes and bows, axes and bows beating lances and hidden weapons, and lances and hidden weapons beating swords and magic" — Minimize repetition by replacing "beating" with "defeating", "besting" and "overpowering".
 * online multiplayer — Link to Multiplayer video game
 * matches can be carried out with selected players — Improve prose: "matches can be carried out with select players".

Development

 * "The game was co-developed" — Minimize repetition: "It was co-developed".
 * "an alternative activity for players, and provide a means" — Improve prose: "an alternative activity for players to provide a means".
 * "map designing became a larger task that initially anticipated" — Fix grammar: "map designing became a larger task than initially anticipated".
 * "main character to marry a character of the same sex is included" — Past tense consistency: "main character to marry a character of the same sex was included".
 * "kingdoms were themed after different cultures: Hoshido was themed after Japan" — Minimize repetition: "kingdoms were based upon different cultures: Hoshido was themed after Japan".
 * "The Hoshido characters' clothing were based around Japanese culture" — Improve prose: "The Hoshido characters' clothing were influenced by Japanese culture".
 * "dark fantasy was used to emphasize" — Minimize repetition: "dark fantasy was used to highlight".

Scenario

 * "raising the game's price to that equivalent to" Fix grammar: "raising the game's price to the equivalent of".
 * "which would have been unfair to people who only wanted to play one version" — WP:POV: "which would not benefit people who wanted to play one single version".
 * "so the full summary for Birthright extended to about 500 pages as a result" — Improve prose (as a result is not needed when so is used as a conjunction): "and thus the full summary for Birthright extended to about 500 pages".
 * "Much of the character traits for the royals" — Minimize repetition: "A great deal of the character traits for the royals".
 * "One of the principle writers" — Fix grammar: "One of the principal writers".

Release

 * "both received a physical release on June 25, 2015 in Japan, and was announced for a" — Fix grammar: "both received a physical release on June 25, 2015 in Japan, which was announced for a". (Referring to physical release.)
 * Nintendo (source 51) does not link to the accurate site.

Reception

 * "Carter found Revelation a good middle ground" — Minimize repetition: "Carter considered Revelation to be a good middle ground".

Sales

 * "Shortly after pre-orders for the special edition were announced, it sold out within a day. After complaints from fans" — Minimize repetition: "Shortly after pre-orders for the special edition were announced, it sold out within a day. Following complaints from fans".
 * "Kibayashi reported via his Twitter announce that" — Improve prose: "Kibayashi reported via his Twitter that".
 * "current best-selling video game in Amazon Japan" — Fix grammar: "current best-selling video game on Amazon Japan".
 * "Birthright and Conquest came in at" — Minimize repetition: "Birthright and Conquest reached".
 * "As of March 31, 2016, the physical versions have sold" — Past tense consistency: "As of March 31, 2016, the physical versions had sold".

Overall

 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):  d (copyvio and plagiarism):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall: The issues I have with the article are minor and easy to fix.
 * Pass/Fail:
 * Cognissonance (talk) 15:58, 21 October 2016 (UTC)
 * I've done my best to sort out all the points above. The Nintendo AU reference is dead for some reason, and I've adjusted it accordingly. --ProtoDrake (talk) 16:43, 21 October 2016 (UTC)
 * (My first stub version of the article I created linked "top down perspective". I hadn't noticed when someone must have removed it over time... Sergecross73   msg me  16:47, 21 October 2016 (UTC) )
 * 1) Overall: The issues I have with the article are minor and easy to fix.
 * Pass/Fail:
 * Cognissonance (talk) 15:58, 21 October 2016 (UTC)
 * I've done my best to sort out all the points above. The Nintendo AU reference is dead for some reason, and I've adjusted it accordingly. --ProtoDrake (talk) 16:43, 21 October 2016 (UTC)
 * (My first stub version of the article I created linked "top down perspective". I hadn't noticed when someone must have removed it over time... Sergecross73   msg me  16:47, 21 October 2016 (UTC) )
 * (My first stub version of the article I created linked "top down perspective". I hadn't noticed when someone must have removed it over time... Sergecross73   msg me  16:47, 21 October 2016 (UTC) )


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):  d (copyvio and plagiarism):
 * Pass/Fail:
 * よくできました. Cognissonance (talk) 17:09, 21 October 2016 (UTC)
 * よくできました. Cognissonance (talk) 17:09, 21 October 2016 (UTC)