Talk:Francis Chan (bishop)/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 13:01, 17 April 2020 (UTC)

Comments
 * "Chinese Singaporean bishop" don't like these two links next door to each other, it's a little sea of blue.
 * De-linked bishop in first sentence. Linked further in lead. —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:51, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * Lead needs a little expansion.
 * Attempted an expansion – hope that's sufficient. —Bloom6132 (talk) 23:20, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * What is "A Council Father"?
 * Any bishop who attended an ecumenical council. —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:51, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * "He succumbed to terminal cancer " avoid euphemisms around death. As tragic as it was, he died.
 * Fixed. Sorry, it's just my habit of not wanting to repeat words. —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:51, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * No free image?
 * Unfortunately no. I suppose taking a screenshot of one of The Straits Times article scans would not be a free image? —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:55, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * " Gregory Yong.[15][17] Yong would later" merge -> " Gregory Yong,[15][17] who would later"
 * Merged. —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:51, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * "noteworthy friendships " what about all the other noteworthy friendships, for completeness, they ought to be mentioned here, right?
 * Wasn't able to find any other friendships in the sources I trawled through. And I presume the noteworthy people who sent messages of condolences and paid their respects as he was lying in state were doing so out of a sense of duty, not necessarily because they knew him well (if at all). —Bloom6132 (talk) 22:12, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * ""token of [their] friendship".[12][13][15][18] " four refs?
 * Used four just to be on the safe side, since that is the hook fact for this article's DYK nom right now. —Bloom6132 (talk) 22:12, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * "courtyard to this day" as of 2020. Needs a timeframe. "to this day" can easily go out of date.
 * Done. —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:51, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * Infobox: why is "Bishop of Penang" in italics?
 * I didn't place italics around that title – that's just the way the parameter appears. —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:51, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * "and was cared fo" odd.  Perhaps a  full stop. "He was cared for...
 * Split the sentence into two. —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:51, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * "night of Friday, 20 October 1967," days of the week are seldom notable.
 * Removed. —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:51, 17 April 2020 (UTC)


 * "It was there that he passed away.[1]" you already mentioned he'd died. And we don't use euphemisms about dying.  He died.
 * Changed to "died" and added the fact that he laid in state there (which wasn't mentioned earlier). —Bloom6132 (talk) 21:51, 17 April 2020 (UTC)
 * On second thought, I mentioned where his residence was and that he laid in state there in the earlier section re his death. Hope that works. —Bloom6132 (talk) 22:37, 17 April 2020 (UTC)

That's it for my first pass, I'll put it on hold while we go over these points. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 20:57, 17 April 2020 (UTC)
 * thanks very much for the review! I hope I've addressed your comments satisfactorily. —Bloom6132 (talk) 23:22, 17 April 2020 (UTC)
 * P.S. I added an important clarification footnote (note B), but that ends up shifting ref 5 and the note to the next line and leaves them standalone. I've tried testing out &nbsp, but that results in a space between the full stop and ref 5 (and lots of whitespace between "Catholic" and "priesthood". —Bloom6132 (talk) 01:40, 18 April 2020 (UTC)
 * Just viewed the article on Safari and the text appeared fine there (i.e. notes not on separate line). Seems to be only a problem on Firefox. —Bloom6132 (talk) 01:56, 18 April 2020 (UTC)

Good work Bloom6132, happy to promote this now. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 08:59, 18 April 2020 (UTC)