Talk:George Jameson (RNZAF officer)/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk · contribs) 13:17, 4 December 2022 (UTC)

I'll take a look at this shortly. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 13:17, 4 December 2022 (UTC)

Prelim

 * The only duplicated link is DSO in the lede, which can probably be kept
 * No edit wars
 * Image is correctly licenced
 * Earwig reports copyvio unlikely

Lede and infobox

 * Suggest adding his middle name to the lede
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 06:39, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Move night-fighter link to first mention in lede
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 06:39, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Link sortie
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 06:39, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Suggest adding how/when he got the DFC to the lede
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 07:31, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Service number can be added to infobox from London Gazette
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 06:39, 10 December 2022 (UTC)

Early life

 * Ref. #4 seems to link to the wrong newspaper article, it discusses his DFC not his education
 * It's easy to miss, but it is near the end of the article (3rd para from the bottom). Zawed (talk) 06:42, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Can you provide any dates for the education?
 * No, the only source for the education only identifies the schools, not the years attended. Zawed (talk) 06:42, 10 December 2022 (UTC)

Second World War

 * "Jameson received his flight training"
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 06:59, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Link flying ace
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 06:59, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "Posted to No. 125 Squadron" based where?
 * Have added. Zawed (talk) 06:59, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "in November he was awarded..." this sentence needs a rejig, doesn't work later on
 * Oops, sorted. Zawed (talk) 06:59, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "with the assistance of radar Jameson shot up"
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 06:59, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * How exactly is radar helping him shoot an aircraft engine? Did it perhaps tell him where the aircraft was?
 * Have rephrased this. Zawed (talk) 06:59, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "flying operations"?
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 06:59, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Do we know which OTU it was?
 * No, the source only gives the briefest of details. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * A more particular date would be useful for the OTU, you've leaving me to guess anywhere between February and December!
 * Again, minimal detail from the source on this. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "Norman Crookes" give Crookes his rank if possible - would be useful to mention somewhere that both his planes are double seaters
 * Rank added and mention of the Mosquito being a two-seater added. Zawed (talk) 06:59, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "Crooks combined" sp?
 * Rephrased. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "A Ju 88 was destroyed" this doesn't actually make it clear that Jameson was the one to do the destroying
 * Rephrased Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Link anti-aircraft gun
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Temporary situation or temporary station?
 * Whoops, should be station. Fixed. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "This second Ju 88" technically this is the third Ju 88
 * It was meant in the context of the second actually detsroyed, but regardless I have rephrased this. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Link sortie
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "he was able to score hits"
 * The number of times I have read this, you think I would have spotted this missing word...fixed. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Link cockpit
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "a Ju 88 was destroyed over Avranches" again, not made clear this is Jameson's work
 * Rephrased. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "September 1944" repeated year
 * Deleted. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "The same month..." too much "sortie" in this sentence!
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * Give the acres number a conversion, probably to hectares?
 * Done. Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)


 * "memorabilia" seems a little tacky, could you describe it better?
 * How about wartime effects? Zawed (talk) 08:15, 10 December 2022 (UTC)